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Old 04-30-2005, 12:14 PM   #1
baddog
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baddog's tip of the day for single guys

I should preface this by stating that I am not sure what kids these days are taught. I know when I was a young lad I was taught to never leave heavy machinery running unattended. This morning I learned that rule is not limited to heavy machinery.

Do not leave blenders unattended either. Especially if they are loaded with all kinds of tasty fruit, like raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, bananas, pears, because there is a very good chance that it will vibrate to the end of the counter and go crashing to the floor spreading a huge, gooey, purple mess all over your kitchen.

Second tip: when cleaning said mess remember that in this gooey mess are shards of glass, or very sharp plastic . . depending on the make of blender.

More tips as they develop.
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Old 04-30-2005, 12:15 PM   #2
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that sucks hardcore

did the blender break ?
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Old 04-30-2005, 12:16 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nofx
that sucks hardcore

did the blender break ?

oh yeah
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Old 04-30-2005, 12:20 PM   #4
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Bolt blender to the counter.
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Old 04-30-2005, 12:20 PM   #5
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Old 04-30-2005, 12:22 PM   #6
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why does this only apply for single guys? do you assume if you're in a relationship you got someone to do the dirty work for you? ;)
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Old 04-30-2005, 12:24 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by baddog
I should preface this by stating that I am not sure what kids these days are taught. I know when I was a young lad I was taught to never leave heavy machinery running unattended. This morning I learned that rule is not limited to heavy machinery.

Do not leave blenders unattended either. Especially if they are loaded with all kinds of tasty fruit, like raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, bananas, pears, because there is a very good chance that it will vibrate to the end of the counter and go crashing to the floor spreading a huge, gooey, purple mess all over your kitchen.

Second tip: when cleaning said mess remember that in this gooey mess are shards of glass, or very sharp plastic . . depending on the make of blender.

More tips as they develop.
so what were you trying to make ? besides a mess
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Old 04-30-2005, 12:27 PM   #8
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lol Damn Baddog sorry about the blender
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Old 04-30-2005, 01:07 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by Vladimir
why does this only apply for single guys? do you assume if you're in a relationship you got someone to do the dirty work for you? ;)
would there be any other reason to be in a relationship?
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Old 04-30-2005, 01:08 PM   #10
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so what were you trying to make ? besides a mess

a smoothie
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Old 04-30-2005, 01:09 PM   #11
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lol Damn Baddog sorry about the blender

yeah, too bad about the blender . . . but I really wanted a smoothie
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Old 04-30-2005, 01:15 PM   #12
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would there be any other reason to be in a relationship?
that´s so true!...
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Old 04-30-2005, 01:19 PM   #13
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that stuff is a pain in the ass to clean up, i did that twice last year
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Old 04-30-2005, 01:31 PM   #14
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that sucks hardcore

did the blender break ?

No, he makes a habit out of adding "shards of glass, or very sharp plastic" to each smoothie.

Think....THEN post.
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Old 04-30-2005, 01:33 PM   #15
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No, he makes a habit out of adding "shards of glass, or very sharp plastic" to each smoothie.

Think....THEN post.

the glass and plastic is added for roughage
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:13 PM   #16
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Dammt hat sucks, well good luck with the next blender maybe she will stick around a lil longer ;) the new ones come with lil suction cups on the bottom to hold it to the counter
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:14 PM   #17
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Hope u unplugged before the clear up lol..........can just see u with an afro!
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:16 PM   #18
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that sucks
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:20 PM   #19
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common sense is often not that coomon
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:28 PM   #20
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Aww Baddog, that sucks! I hope there was no blood involved!
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:31 PM   #21
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why does this only apply for single guys? do you assume if you're in a relationship you got someone to do the dirty work for you? ;)
Because a woman would know better (even if they do only have half a brain - as my daddy always teases!)
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:38 PM   #22
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at least you clean it up and dont leave it for someone else too
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:48 PM   #23
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Dammt hat sucks, well good luck with the next blender maybe she will stick around a lil longer ;) the new ones come with lil suction cups on the bottom to hold it to the counter

I will definitely look for that feature on the next one
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:50 PM   #24
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Hope u unplugged before the clear up lol..........can just see u with an afro!

Well, I guess if the cord was +5' long this could be an issue, but as it was only 2' or 3' it made sure to unplug itself before it came crashing to the floor
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:53 PM   #25
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at least you clean it up and dont leave it for someone else too
I did not feel like buying a dog just to get rid of the mess
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:56 PM   #26
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How long do you blend your smoothies?
It seems like long enough to vibrate off of the counter would be quite a bit long

Personally I would wait until I could hang around for that couple of minutes before even starting it
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Old 04-30-2005, 04:57 PM   #27
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I did not feel like buying a dog just to get rid of the mess
Dogs don't digest glass any better than humans
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Old 04-30-2005, 05:01 PM   #28
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No, he makes a habit out of adding "shards of glass, or very sharp plastic" to each smoothie.

Think....THEN post.
more like I was asking if the whole thing broke or just the glass/plastic blending top part... if the base is still good, you could just get a new part.
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Old 04-30-2005, 08:49 PM   #29
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yo baddog i want a blog trade! www.pimpfromhell.com
email me please. wolly [a] hoehoehoe.net
or icq 293-689-049
or just reply here ;)
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Old 04-30-2005, 10:15 PM   #30
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more like I was asking if the whole thing broke or just the glass/plastic blending top part... if the base is still good, you could just get a new part.
oh . . . I don't know, I just tossed it . . . I was pissed. I will get one of those new fangled ones with the suction cups . . . now that I think about it, the base must have had something break, because when I put it back on the counter it tilted radically
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Old 04-30-2005, 10:20 PM   #31
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Personally I would wait until I could hang around for that couple of minutes before even starting it

Well, I was giving it a head start while I peeled an orange to add to it . . . was only about 5' away, but wasn't paying attention as I really didn't think it would fall . . . . not like it is the first time I have done this
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Old 04-30-2005, 10:36 PM   #32
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Duct tape fixes everything ;)
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Old 04-30-2005, 11:11 PM   #33
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Old 04-30-2005, 11:12 PM   #34
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baddog,

Your post is one of the very best dating profiles I've ever read. You all know I have reason to have read more than my share, but you may not know that I've also written quite a few.

What baddog has achieved here is something all you men with prospects of gettin' yerselves sum should take a moment to consider closely. This is what they call in the online dating jargon the "Heart of Golden Thumbs" approach.

Go back and read it. Observe the tone, the voice, the sheer heroism he conveys for having survived a trivial household fracas. What baddog understands so well, is that women LOVE a man's various inefficencies and deficiencies around the house. The house, as regards what they consider it's most essential functions (the "keeping" of it, as it were) is THEIR territory. And a man who gives such clear evidence, as baddog has given here, that he is WITHOUT WOMAN and MAKING A MESS OF HIS HOUSE, is as good a pussy-gettin' signal as any in nature.


j-


PS: That should also clarify the presence of the word "single" in the title, for the fellow who asked.
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:23 AM   #35
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buy a better blender next time. only the el-cheapoz vibrate and move like that
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:30 AM   #36
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buy a better blender next time. only the el-cheapoz vibrate and move like that
Hmmm, I have worked in many kitchens where some of the blenders vibrated like crazy and cost over $1K each. Fortunatley they had suction cups to hold them in place.
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:34 AM   #37
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buy a better blender next time. only the el-cheapoz vibrate and move like that

Please direct me to an electric motor with blades that does not vibrate, with or without food in it.

Or are you suggesting I should get a nuclear powered one?
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:45 AM   #38
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baddog,

Your post is one of the very best dating profiles I've ever read. You all know I have reason to have read more than my share, but you may not know that I've also written quite a few.

What baddog has achieved here is something all you men with prospects of gettin' yerselves sum should take a moment to consider closely. This is what they call in the online dating jargon the "Heart of Golden Thumbs" approach.

Go back and read it. Observe the tone, the voice, the sheer heroism he conveys for having survived a trivial household fracas. What baddog understands so well, is that women LOVE a man's various inefficencies and deficiencies around the house. The house, as regards what they consider it's most essential functions (the "keeping" of it, as it were) is THEIR territory. And a man who gives such clear evidence, as baddog has given here, that he is WITHOUT WOMAN and MAKING A MESS OF HIS HOUSE, is as good a pussy-gettin' signal as any in nature.


j-


PS: That should also clarify the presence of the word "single" in the title, for the fellow who asked.

If you can insure it won't be rejected, I will be sure to use it on my SexSearch profile.
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:47 AM   #39
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would there be any other reason to be in a relationship?
Uhm...for sex?
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:49 AM   #40
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Is this going to be a series? ;)
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:54 AM   #41
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Uhm...for sex?

pssst . . . I discovered a long time ago that you don't need to have a relationship to have sex
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:55 AM   #42
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Is this going to be a series? ;)

that is entirely possible
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Old 05-01-2005, 12:57 AM   #43
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pssst . . . I discovered a long time ago that you don't need to have a relationship to have sex
hehe. smartass.
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Old 05-01-2005, 01:00 AM   #44
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pssst . . . I discovered a long time ago that you don't need to have a relationship to have sex
Dammit man, stop telling the womenfolk all our good singleguy secrets!
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Old 05-01-2005, 01:01 AM   #45
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hehe. smartass.

so many comments seem appropriate here . . . but I will save them for ICQ
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Old 05-01-2005, 01:04 AM   #46
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Well, I was giving it a head start while I peeled an orange to add to it . . . was only about 5' away, but wasn't paying attention as I really didn't think it would fall . . . . not like it is the first time I have done this
jesus fucking christ what the hell kind of caligula smoothie was that - raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, bananas, pears wasnt enough, just had to have the fucking orange in there too huh?

heres a good one - frozen naners, bloobs and strawberries in apple juice with protein powder yummy
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Old 05-01-2005, 01:06 AM   #47
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Dammit man, stop telling the womenfolk all our good singleguy secrets!

believe me, I was thinking about this continuing series of "tips for the single guy" and telling myself, "no, you can't tell them that one;" and . . . "no, that one probably should not be put up on a public forum either."

Guess they will have to wait for the book.
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Old 05-01-2005, 01:06 AM   #48
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jesus fucking christ what the hell kind of caligula smoothie was that - raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, bananas, pears wasnt enough, just had to have the fucking orange in there too huh?
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Old 05-01-2005, 01:07 AM   #49
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jesus fucking christ what the hell kind of caligula smoothie was that - raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, bananas, pears wasnt enough, just had to have the fucking orange in there too huh?

heres a good one - frozen naners, bloobs and strawberries in apple juice with protein powder yummy

I was hungry . . . .and I don't do frozen fruit
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Old 05-01-2005, 01:08 AM   #50
CDSmith
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Good thing you didn't have 4 or 5 shots of vodka in there, that would have been a shameful waste.

Shameful!
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