Now this is Funny!!!!!! - GoFuckYourself.com

Odie · 03-31-2005, 02:56 PM

This is sad but TOO FUNNY. Definitely a LOL. Enjoy!!
>
>
>
> >Bricklayer's Accident Report ~
> >
> >Possibly the funniest story in a while. This is a bricklayer's
> >accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian
> >equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board. This is a true story.
> >
> >Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure....
> >------------------------
> >
> >Dear Sir:
> >
> >I am writing in response to your request for additional information
> >in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the
> >cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust
> >the following details will be sufficient.
> >
> >I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was
> >working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I
> >completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when
> >weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.
> >
> >Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower
> >them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of
> >the building on the sixth floor.
> >
> >Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung
> >the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and
> >untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the
>bricks.
> >
> >You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I
> >weigh 175lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so
> >suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.
> >Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.
> >
> >In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was
> >now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed. This explained
> >the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the
> >broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.
> >
> >Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until
> >the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.
> >Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and
> >was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to
> >experience a great deal of pain.
> >
> >At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit
> >the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the
> >weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer
> >you again to my weight.
> >
> >As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the
> >building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.
> >
> >This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several
> >lacerations of my legs and lower body.
> >
> >Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the
> >barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into
> >the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
> >
> >I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks,
> >in pain unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind
> >and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin
> >its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
> >
> >I hope this answers your inquiry.
> >
> >Bill Fuller
> >
>I was having a bad day until I read this....

ronaldo · 03-31-2005, 02:59 PM

Have you heard the song "The Bricklayer?"

It's even funnier put to music.

http://paul.merton.ox.ac.uk/work/bricklayer-song.html

Download it. You won't regret it.

ronaldo · 03-31-2005, 03:01 PM

If you can't find it, and want to hear it Odie, hit me up and I'll get it to you.

body · 03-31-2005, 03:02 PM

yupp, thats funny

Furious_Female · 03-31-2005, 03:02 PM

OMG lolol wow

groark · 03-31-2005, 03:03 PM

My father was bricklayer

Odie · 03-31-2005, 03:04 PM

omg Ronaldo I almost peeed myself ahahahahahahahahaha....

Manowar · 03-31-2005, 03:06 PM

axelcat · 03-31-2005, 03:09 PM

lolololololol

wildone · 03-31-2005, 03:11 PM

hahaha

i think the best line is, "Here my luck began to change slightly."

Odie · 03-31-2005, 03:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by groark

My father was bricklayer

ahahha...that's back breaking work..I still can't stop laughing...

Chichio · 03-31-2005, 03:21 PM

And it sounded like such a good idea at the time.

Odie · 03-31-2005, 03:27 PM

I just heard the song ROFL!!

I hope everyone had a good laugh like I did!! It totally made my day! ahahahahhaha It's amazing how one dreary day can turn into such a wonderful day from one good laugh!!

I hope everyone has a wonderful day!!

Deepai · 03-31-2005, 03:30 PM

thats so bad, it can't be real... either way

Screaming · 03-31-2005, 03:32 PM

wow just fucking wow

03-31-2005, 03:37 PM

oh my fucking god

woj · 03-31-2005, 03:39 PM

Odie · 04-01-2005, 10:41 AM

bump for the April Fools out there b/c I KNOW there are ppl THAT dumb out there...lmao

Tala · 04-01-2005, 10:48 AM

OMG!

ROFLMFAO

That's fucking hilarious!

foxylady · 04-01-2005, 10:50 AM

lol

sickkittens · 04-01-2005, 10:59 AM

Too bad something like that was never caught on tape.

GatorB · 04-01-2005, 11:01 AM

Somebody failed basic physics in school.

Platinum Red · 04-01-2005, 11:43 AM

omg that is too damn funny in a sad way

Barefootsies · 04-01-2005, 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Odie

This is sad but TOO FUNNY. Definitely a LOL. Enjoy!!
>
>
>
> >Bricklayer's Accident Report ~
> >
> >Possibly the funniest story in a while. This is a bricklayer's
> >accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian
> >equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board. This is a true story.
> >
> >Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure....
> >------------------------
> >
> >Dear Sir:
> >
> >I am writing in response to your request for additional information
> >in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the
> >cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust
> >the following details will be sufficient.
> >
> >I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was
> >working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I
> >completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when
> >weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.
> >
> >Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower
> >them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of
> >the building on the sixth floor.
> >
> >Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung
> >the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and
> >untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the
>bricks.
> >
> >You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I
> >weigh 175lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so
> >suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.
> >Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.
> >
> >In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was
> >now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed. This explained
> >the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the
> >broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.
> >
> >Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until
> >the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.
> >Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and
> >was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to
> >experience a great deal of pain.
> >
> >At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit
> >the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the
> >weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer
> >you again to my weight.
> >
> >As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the
> >building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.
> >
> >This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several
> >lacerations of my legs and lower body.
> >
> >Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the
> >barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into
> >the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
> >
> >I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks,
> >in pain unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind
> >and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin
> >its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
> >
> >I hope this answers your inquiry.
> >
> >Bill Fuller
> >
>I was having a bad day until I read this....

funny sire.

thefool · 04-01-2005, 11:56 AM

LOL after reading that I don't feel so stupid. (he after all, was a professional too). I've been doing several home improvement projects. Painted the entire upstairs (ranch), tore up carpets, installed new light fixtures, bathroom faucets, and once I'm done with the basement, gonna tear the carpet out of the kitchen and put in new tile.

So today, I'm in the basement, which 1/3 of is now 85% my soon to be den (16 x 21). Well, I wanted a phone line. So I bought some wire & tried to tap into the phone jack. For some reason, one would assume, the wires are color coded and you'd just match them up. Upon doing so (thank god I'm not using dial-up) all the phones in the house started to ring, nonstop. Horrible static, ringing, etc. I took the new wires out, and started again, spending about 45 mins, doing every color combination possible. Its just not working... so my BROTHER... who's a GENIUS! Takes a shot at it. Same thing, so he's moving wires, etc. NOW... boy genius gets annoyed. I said, look theres a spot where theres electrical tape, maybe we can splice in there and not at the wire box. Same thing, annoying ringing & static & feedback. Then my brother got frustrated and pulled all the wires out of the wire box, and at this point, theres no phones working in any room. I'm going to go down and try to remember what colors were where, when we started

At least when I ran all the electrical wiring and installed the new breakers, it went smooth LMAO

Anyone here work for the phone company?? lol

Odie · 04-01-2005, 01:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thefool

LOL after reading that I don't feel so stupid. (he after all, was a professional too). I've been doing several home improvement projects. Painted the entire upstairs (ranch), tore up carpets, installed new light fixtures, bathroom faucets, and once I'm done with the basement, gonna tear the carpet out of the kitchen and put in new tile.

So today, I'm in the basement, which 1/3 of is now 85% my soon to be den (16 x 21). Well, I wanted a phone line. So I bought some wire & tried to tap into the phone jack. For some reason, one would assume, the wires are color coded and you'd just match them up. Upon doing so (thank god I'm not using dial-up) all the phones in the house started to ring, nonstop. Horrible static, ringing, etc. I took the new wires out, and started again, spending about 45 mins, doing every color combination possible. Its just not working... so my BROTHER... who's a GENIUS! Takes a shot at it. Same thing, so he's moving wires, etc. NOW... boy genius gets annoyed. I said, look theres a spot where theres electrical tape, maybe we can splice in there and not at the wire box. Same thing, annoying ringing & static & feedback. Then my brother got frustrated and pulled all the wires out of the wire box, and at this point, theres no phones working in any room. I'm going to go down and try to remember what colors were where, when we started

At least when I ran all the electrical wiring and installed the new breakers, it went smooth LMAO

Anyone here work for the phone company?? lol

ahahahahha lmao...see you need to call a professional...

Odie · 04-01-2005, 01:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tala

OMG!

ROFLMFAO

That's fucking hilarious!

I knew you'd like that Tala!!!

gangbangjoe · 04-01-2005, 01:13 PM

heard it before

still funny

Odie · 04-01-2005, 01:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gangbangjoe

heard it before

still funny

I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.

tranza · 04-01-2005, 01:39 PM

That can't be true! Seems like a "Home Alone" scene!

03-31-2005, 02:56 PM	#1
Odie Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The WATER BABY! Posts: 7,040	Now this is Funny!!!!!! This is sad but TOO FUNNY. Definitely a LOL. Enjoy!! > > > > >Bricklayer's Accident Report ~ > > > >Possibly the funniest story in a while. This is a bricklayer's > >accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian > >equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board. This is a true story. > > > >Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.... > >------------------------ > > > >Dear Sir: > > > >I am writing in response to your request for additional information > >in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the > >cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust > >the following details will be sufficient. > > > >I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was > >working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I > >completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when > >weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs. > > > >Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower > >them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of > >the building on the sixth floor. > > > >Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung > >the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and > >untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the >bricks. > > > >You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I > >weigh 175lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so > >suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. > >Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. > > > >In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was > >now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed. This explained > >the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the > >broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form. > > > >Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until > >the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. > >Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and > >was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to > >experience a great deal of pain. > > > >At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit > >the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the > >weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer > >you again to my weight. > > > >As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the > >building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. > > > >This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several > >lacerations of my legs and lower body. > > > >Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the > >barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into > >the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked. > > > >I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, > >in pain unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind > >and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin > >its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs. > > > >I hope this answers your inquiry. > > > >Bill Fuller > > >I was having a bad day until I read this.... __________________ Odie [email protected] Are you Mobile???? MMACanada ICQ # 166208354 See Who I Am At AdultWhosWho.com!

03-31-2005, 03:02 PM	#4
body Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 5,014	yupp, thats funny __________________ The Goddess Of Steps

03-31-2005, 03:02 PM	#5
Furious_Female Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Upstate, New York Posts: 8,187	OMG lolol wow __________________ Skype: j3nn.com ICQ 160370494 My current favorite high-converting sponsor: CrakRevenue

03-31-2005, 03:04 PM	#7
Odie Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The WATER BABY! Posts: 7,040	omg Ronaldo I almost peeed myself ahahahahahahahahaha.... __________________ Odie [email protected] Are you Mobile???? MMACanada ICQ # 166208354 See Who I Am At AdultWhosWho.com!

03-31-2005, 03:11 PM	#10
wildone Registered User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: VA, USA Posts: 32	hahaha i think the best line is, "Here my luck began to change slightly." __________________ ICQ: 196355256 BLOG: Smut Rookies MGP: Seth's Movies

03-31-2005, 02:59 PM	#2
ronaldo Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: ICQ#: 272000271 Posts: 5,475	Have you heard the song "The Bricklayer?" It's even funnier put to music. http://paul.merton.ox.ac.uk/work/bricklayer-song.html Download it. You won't regret it.

03-31-2005, 03:01 PM	#3
ronaldo Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: ICQ#: 272000271 Posts: 5,475	If you can't find it, and want to hear it Odie, hit me up and I'll get it to you.

03-31-2005, 03:03 PM	#6
groark So Fucking Banned Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Germany Posts: 1,966	My father was bricklayer

03-31-2005, 03:06 PM	#8
Manowar jellyfish Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 71,528

03-31-2005, 03:09 PM	#9
axelcat Adult Locals Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: West Coast Posts: 25,450	lolololololol

03-31-2005, 03:21 PM	#12
Chichio Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Seattle Posts: 1,467	And it sounded like such a good idea at the time. __________________ Exclusive Asian Content Program - FlyHighCash

03-31-2005, 03:27 PM	#13
Odie Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The WATER BABY! Posts: 7,040	I just heard the song ROFL!! I hope everyone had a good laugh like I did!! It totally made my day! ahahahahhaha It's amazing how one dreary day can turn into such a wonderful day from one good laugh!! I hope everyone has a wonderful day!! __________________ Odie [email protected] Are you Mobile???? MMACanada ICQ # 166208354 See Who I Am At AdultWhosWho.com!

03-31-2005, 03:30 PM	#14
Deepai Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Seattle, WA. Posts: 1,583	thats so bad, it can't be real... either way __________________ SOULCASH BULLFIGHTER THE BAND

03-31-2005, 03:32 PM	#15
Screaming I can change this!!!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 18,972	wow just fucking wow __________________

03-31-2005, 03:37 PM	#16
buddyjuf Guest Posts: n/a	oh my fucking god

03-31-2005, 03:39 PM	#17
woj <&(©¿©)&> Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Chicago Posts: 47,882	__________________ Custom Software Development, email: woj#at#wojfun#.#com to discuss details or skype: wojl2000 or gchat: wojfun or telegram: wojl2000 Affiliate program tools: Hosted Galleries Manager Banner Manager Video Manager Wordpress Affiliate Plugin Pic/Movie of the Day Fansign Generator Zip Manager

04-01-2005, 10:41 AM	#18
Odie Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The WATER BABY! Posts: 7,040	bump for the April Fools out there b/c I KNOW there are ppl THAT dumb out there...lmao __________________ Odie [email protected] Are you Mobile???? MMACanada ICQ # 166208354 See Who I Am At AdultWhosWho.com!

04-01-2005, 10:48 AM	#19
Tala Fucked if I know Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Do you have a flag? Posts: 23,368	OMG! ROFLMFAO That's fucking hilarious! __________________ ICQ: 11120676 \| Google: mindcrime \| Skype: suitemindcrime\|E-Mail: mindcrime AT gmail.com\|PR girl with great writing skills for hire!!!! Contact me to work for YOU!\|TECHIEMEDIA? 24/7 support from some of the best techs in the biz. Tell Jim that I sent you.

04-01-2005, 10:50 AM	#20
foxylady Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 1,829	lol __________________

04-01-2005, 10:59 AM	#21
sickkittens I am a meat popsicle. Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 25,100	Too bad something like that was never caught on tape. __________________ HIGHEST PAYOUTS FOR NO-CONSOLE TOURS IN THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY! THIS SIG CAN BE YOURS FOR $200 - ICQ: 78881543

04-01-2005, 11:01 AM	#22
GatorB The Demon & 12clicks Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: SallyRand is a FAGGOT Posts: 18,208	Somebody failed basic physics in school.

04-01-2005, 11:43 AM	#23
Platinum Red Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: In heart of Toronto Posts: 517	omg that is too damn funny in a sad way __________________ Platinum Red any questions - [email protected] ICQ # 167818595

04-01-2005, 11:56 AM	#25
thefool Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: ICQ 341530034 Posts: 1,593	LOL after reading that I don't feel so stupid. (he after all, was a professional too). I've been doing several home improvement projects. Painted the entire upstairs (ranch), tore up carpets, installed new light fixtures, bathroom faucets, and once I'm done with the basement, gonna tear the carpet out of the kitchen and put in new tile. So today, I'm in the basement, which 1/3 of is now 85% my soon to be den (16 x 21). Well, I wanted a phone line. So I bought some wire & tried to tap into the phone jack. For some reason, one would assume, the wires are color coded and you'd just match them up. Upon doing so (thank god I'm not using dial-up) all the phones in the house started to ring, nonstop. Horrible static, ringing, etc. I took the new wires out, and started again, spending about 45 mins, doing every color combination possible. Its just not working... so my BROTHER... who's a GENIUS! Takes a shot at it. Same thing, so he's moving wires, etc. NOW... boy genius gets annoyed. I said, look theres a spot where theres electrical tape, maybe we can splice in there and not at the wire box. Same thing, annoying ringing & static & feedback. Then my brother got frustrated and pulled all the wires out of the wire box, and at this point, theres no phones working in any room. I'm going to go down and try to remember what colors were where, when we started At least when I ran all the electrical wiring and installed the new breakers, it went smooth LMAO Anyone here work for the phone company?? lol __________________ NF pays $50 for each new join!

04-01-2005, 01:13 PM	#28
gangbangjoe Ronin Join Date: May 2004 Location: Live by the code Die by the code Posts: 17,693	heard it before still funny __________________ NichePay - $30 on all trials - Killer Ratios .................................................. Female Ejaculation - Hairy - Shemale Puffy Nipples - Huge Clits - And More! ..................................................

04-01-2005, 01:39 PM	#30
tranza ICQ: 197-556-237 Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: BRASIL !!! Posts: 57,559	That can't be true! Seems like a "Home Alone" scene! __________________ I'm just a newbie.