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Old 03-31-2005, 02:56 PM   #1
Odie
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Now this is Funny!!!!!!

This is sad but TOO FUNNY. Definitely a LOL. Enjoy!!
>
>
>
> >Bricklayer's Accident Report ~
> >
> >Possibly the funniest story in a while. This is a bricklayer's
> >accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian
> >equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board. This is a true story.
> >
> >Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure....
> >------------------------
> >
> >Dear Sir:
> >
> >I am writing in response to your request for additional information
> >in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the
> >cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust
> >the following details will be sufficient.
> >
> >I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was
> >working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I
> >completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when
> >weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.
> >
> >Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower
> >them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of
> >the building on the sixth floor.
> >
> >Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung
> >the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and
> >untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the
>bricks.
> >
> >You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I
> >weigh 175lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so
> >suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.
> >Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.
> >
> >In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was
> >now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed. This explained
> >the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the
> >broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.
> >
> >Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until
> >the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.
> >Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and
> >was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to
> >experience a great deal of pain.
> >
> >At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit
> >the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the
> >weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer
> >you again to my weight.
> >
> >As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the
> >building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.
> >
> >This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several
> >lacerations of my legs and lower body.
> >
> >Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the
> >barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into
> >the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
> >
> >I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks,
> >in pain unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind
> >and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin
> >its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
> >
> >I hope this answers your inquiry.
> >
> >Bill Fuller
> >
>I was having a bad day until I read this....
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Old 03-31-2005, 02:59 PM   #2
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Have you heard the song "The Bricklayer?"

It's even funnier put to music.

http://paul.merton.ox.ac.uk/work/bricklayer-song.html

Download it. You won't regret it.
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:01 PM   #3
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If you can't find it, and want to hear it Odie, hit me up and I'll get it to you.
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:02 PM   #4
body
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yupp, thats funny
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:02 PM   #5
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OMG lolol wow
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:03 PM   #6
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My father was bricklayer
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:04 PM   #7
Odie
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omg Ronaldo I almost peeed myself ahahahahahahahahaha....
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:06 PM   #8
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:09 PM   #9
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lolololololol
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:11 PM   #10
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hahaha

i think the best line is, "Here my luck began to change slightly."
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:13 PM   #11
Odie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by groark
My father was bricklayer
ahahha...that's back breaking work..I still can't stop laughing...
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:21 PM   #12
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And it sounded like such a good idea at the time.
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:27 PM   #13
Odie
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I just heard the song ROFL!!

I hope everyone had a good laugh like I did!! It totally made my day! ahahahahhaha It's amazing how one dreary day can turn into such a wonderful day from one good laugh!!

I hope everyone has a wonderful day!!
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:30 PM   #14
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thats so bad, it can't be real... either way
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:32 PM   #15
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wow just fucking wow
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:37 PM   #16
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oh my fucking god
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Old 03-31-2005, 03:39 PM   #17
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Old 04-01-2005, 10:41 AM   #18
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bump for the April Fools out there b/c I KNOW there are ppl THAT dumb out there...lmao
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Old 04-01-2005, 10:48 AM   #19
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OMG!

ROFLMFAO

That's fucking hilarious!
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Old 04-01-2005, 10:50 AM   #20
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lol
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Old 04-01-2005, 10:59 AM   #21
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Too bad something like that was never caught on tape.
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Old 04-01-2005, 11:01 AM   #22
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Somebody failed basic physics in school.
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Old 04-01-2005, 11:43 AM   #23
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omg that is too damn funny in a sad way
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Old 04-01-2005, 11:44 AM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Odie
This is sad but TOO FUNNY. Definitely a LOL. Enjoy!!
>
>
>
> >Bricklayer's Accident Report ~
> >
> >Possibly the funniest story in a while. This is a bricklayer's
> >accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian
> >equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board. This is a true story.
> >
> >Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure....
> >------------------------
> >
> >Dear Sir:
> >
> >I am writing in response to your request for additional information
> >in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the
> >cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust
> >the following details will be sufficient.
> >
> >I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was
> >working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I
> >completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when
> >weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.
> >
> >Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower
> >them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of
> >the building on the sixth floor.
> >
> >Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung
> >the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and
> >untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the
>bricks.
> >
> >You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I
> >weigh 175lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so
> >suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.
> >Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.
> >
> >In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was
> >now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed. This explained
> >the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the
> >broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.
> >
> >Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until
> >the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.
> >Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and
> >was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to
> >experience a great deal of pain.
> >
> >At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit
> >the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the
> >weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer
> >you again to my weight.
> >
> >As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the
> >building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.
> >
> >This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several
> >lacerations of my legs and lower body.
> >
> >Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the
> >barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into
> >the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
> >
> >I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks,
> >in pain unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind
> >and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin
> >its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
> >
> >I hope this answers your inquiry.
> >
> >Bill Fuller
> >
>I was having a bad day until I read this....
funny sire.



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Old 04-01-2005, 11:56 AM   #25
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LOL after reading that I don't feel so stupid. (he after all, was a professional too). I've been doing several home improvement projects. Painted the entire upstairs (ranch), tore up carpets, installed new light fixtures, bathroom faucets, and once I'm done with the basement, gonna tear the carpet out of the kitchen and put in new tile.

So today, I'm in the basement, which 1/3 of is now 85% my soon to be den (16 x 21). Well, I wanted a phone line. So I bought some wire & tried to tap into the phone jack. For some reason, one would assume, the wires are color coded and you'd just match them up. Upon doing so (thank god I'm not using dial-up) all the phones in the house started to ring, nonstop. Horrible static, ringing, etc. I took the new wires out, and started again, spending about 45 mins, doing every color combination possible. Its just not working... so my BROTHER... who's a GENIUS! Takes a shot at it. Same thing, so he's moving wires, etc. NOW... boy genius gets annoyed. I said, look theres a spot where theres electrical tape, maybe we can splice in there and not at the wire box. Same thing, annoying ringing & static & feedback. Then my brother got frustrated and pulled all the wires out of the wire box, and at this point, theres no phones working in any room. I'm going to go down and try to remember what colors were where, when we started At least when I ran all the electrical wiring and installed the new breakers, it went smooth LMAO

Anyone here work for the phone company?? lol
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Old 04-01-2005, 01:06 PM   #26
Odie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thefool
LOL after reading that I don't feel so stupid. (he after all, was a professional too). I've been doing several home improvement projects. Painted the entire upstairs (ranch), tore up carpets, installed new light fixtures, bathroom faucets, and once I'm done with the basement, gonna tear the carpet out of the kitchen and put in new tile.

So today, I'm in the basement, which 1/3 of is now 85% my soon to be den (16 x 21). Well, I wanted a phone line. So I bought some wire & tried to tap into the phone jack. For some reason, one would assume, the wires are color coded and you'd just match them up. Upon doing so (thank god I'm not using dial-up) all the phones in the house started to ring, nonstop. Horrible static, ringing, etc. I took the new wires out, and started again, spending about 45 mins, doing every color combination possible. Its just not working... so my BROTHER... who's a GENIUS! Takes a shot at it. Same thing, so he's moving wires, etc. NOW... boy genius gets annoyed. I said, look theres a spot where theres electrical tape, maybe we can splice in there and not at the wire box. Same thing, annoying ringing & static & feedback. Then my brother got frustrated and pulled all the wires out of the wire box, and at this point, theres no phones working in any room. I'm going to go down and try to remember what colors were where, when we started At least when I ran all the electrical wiring and installed the new breakers, it went smooth LMAO

Anyone here work for the phone company?? lol
ahahahahha lmao...see you need to call a professional...
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Old 04-01-2005, 01:07 PM   #27
Odie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tala
OMG!

ROFLMFAO

That's fucking hilarious!
I knew you'd like that Tala!!!
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Old 04-01-2005, 01:13 PM   #28
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heard it before

still funny
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Old 04-01-2005, 01:14 PM   #29
Odie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gangbangjoe
heard it before

still funny
I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.
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Old 04-01-2005, 01:39 PM   #30
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That can't be true! Seems like a "Home Alone" scene!
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