"its not easy being a perfect bitch" :1orglaugh

"Reports that say that something hasn't happened are always interesting to me, because as we know, there are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns - the ones we don't know we don't know."

- Donald Ramsfeld

:)

I read that three times and I am still confused. :helpme

"fuck you pay me"


-Goodfellas

Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.

One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards.

It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious.

I like persons better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better than anything else in the world.

-Oscar Wilde

Ali G: Lets talk about in the airports, you know those machines that beep when you got coins in your pocket? Why dont they develope a machine that beeps when you're carrying a gun?

Homeland Security: Well it does too. A Gun will also set it off, or a knife.

Ali G: But its mainly designed for coins and keys right?

"Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait, not me, you."

"Instead of a Seeing Eye dog, what about a gun? It's cheaper than a dog, plus if you walk around shooting all the time, people are going to get out of the way. Cars too! "

A slinky is just like a human being. They don't serve any real purpose, but you cant help but laugh when they fall down the stairs."

"When I die, I would like to go peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming and yelling like the passenger in his car. "

-jack handey

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.

Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others.

I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot.

http://www.porngreen.com/shit/groucho.gif

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day.
Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.

Lord of the rings

I like that one :thumbsup