You know you are a redneck when ... - GoFuckYourself.com

lil2rich4u2 · 09-28-2004, 09:53 PM

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.

3. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

4. You think the Nutcracker is something you do off the high dive.

5. The Salvation Army declines your mattress.

6. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.

7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.

8. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

9. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

10. Your grandmother has Ammo on her Christmas list.

11. You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.

12. Your kids take a siphon hose to show and tell.

13. You have used a rag for a gas cap.

14. Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does.

15. You wonder how service stations keep their rest rooms so clean.

16. You can spit without opening your mouth.

17. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

18. You have a complete set of salad bowls, and they all say Cool Whip on the side.

19. The biggest city you've ever been to is Walmart.

20. Your working TV sits on top of your non working TV.

21. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.

22. You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart.

23. Your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home.

24. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvement.

25. You've used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.

26. You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.

ok ok i know its old, but i get a kick out of it heh

enjoy

nofx · 09-28-2004, 09:56 PM

27. when you fuck anyone in your own blood line.

BrainDead · 09-28-2004, 10:01 PM

okay! very well said! thanks for

beergood · 09-28-2004, 10:02 PM

28. You were born in Canada.

spamofon · 09-28-2004, 10:10 PM

Born in south part of USA

Mike Panic · 09-28-2004, 10:12 PM

heh... this stuff never gets old, watched jeff foxworth on comedy central this weekend, for about the 5th time

09-28-2004, 09:53 PM	#1
lil2rich4u2 ICQ: 175171926 Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: New York, NY Posts: 11,046	You know you are a redneck when ... 1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree. 2. You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter. 3. You burn your yard rather than mow it. 4. You think the Nutcracker is something you do off the high dive. 5. The Salvation Army declines your mattress. 6. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph. 7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it. 8. You come back from the dump with more than you took. 9. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table. 10. Your grandmother has Ammo on her Christmas list. 11. You think a subdivision is part of a math problem. 12. Your kids take a siphon hose to show and tell. 13. You have used a rag for a gas cap. 14. Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does. 15. You wonder how service stations keep their rest rooms so clean. 16. You can spit without opening your mouth. 17. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it. 18. You have a complete set of salad bowls, and they all say Cool Whip on the side. 19. The biggest city you've ever been to is Walmart. 20. Your working TV sits on top of your non working TV. 21. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table. 22. You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart. 23. Your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home. 24. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvement. 25. You've used a toilet brush as a back scratcher. 26. You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty. ok ok i know its old, but i get a kick out of it heh enjoy __________________ HEY!! Unbeatable hosting! Customer service is top notch! --> ISPrime <-- Do a search on any board, their reputation is rock solid .. for years!!

09-28-2004, 09:56 PM	#2
nofx Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Virgin Mary's womb Posts: 16,826	27. when you fuck anyone in your own blood line. __________________ Often times I wonder why There's love and hate, theres live or die. When sickness comes I must decide: When feelings go, theres suicide.

09-28-2004, 10:02 PM	#4
beergood Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: United States Posts: 2,918	28. You were born in Canada. __________________ icq: 320340263

09-28-2004, 10:12 PM	#6
Mike Panic Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: pa Posts: 425	heh... this stuff never gets old, watched jeff foxworth on comedy central this weekend, for about the 5th time __________________ hire me

09-28-2004, 10:01 PM	#3
BrainDead So Fucking Banned Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 1,536	okay! very well said! thanks for

09-28-2004, 10:10 PM	#5
spamofon Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Toronto Posts: 2,999	Born in south part of USA