Keev

Well First Of All I Bartend @ a small sports bar near my now former college. Yea I am still doing bitch work 1 night a week till I get a full time consulting gig or ecommerce management position again, while doing my own side work for non adult and adult ventures...

Anyways to get to the story last night well a couple hours ago I came home from a long and tiring night of fetching, and making drinks for lots of drunks watching the dodgers and sorry ass angels play baseball

Well the knight was one of those knights where u just want to get the hell out of there becuase your best bud has invited about 8 girls over for drinks and everyhings up in the spa well as the nights going people start funneling in afterwork to get there buzz on and then the dinner rush from hell cook is cursing up a storm in spanish, drivers are cursing too amazing what kinda of spanish they learn in highschool vs out of class and how much faster and cleaner the words roll out when a order is placed on there table PINCHI BEDEHO, CHUPA MI WUEVOS, PESO MI NALGAS You name it! well finally he night draws to a lull where the regusalrs are bullshitting stories I am sitting at the bar with a bear and some hotwings and this nice looking couple walks in the lady fair skinned tall, and wearing a elegant dress as if gone out for there 1st maybe second date the guy is a off and on regualr know his name and alittle more thats about it so they sit down at the bar he orders a schooner of newcastle, she orders a of chardoney and after a couple rounds i can see shes taking a beating. So I offer her some tylenol so I goto the back area to get some.

well now the crowd has dwindled dow to about 8 or so really close and well know regualrs shooting the shit u have fatboy slim in norms corner bar slot, woody trying to earn a buck and all the other characters a small bar would have some playing pool others getting there own drinks becuase i am in the bck and could give a shit....

In the mean time while i am digging around the stock room, the elegant women has to use the ladies room and well just before hand a butch short stocky puerto rican person went into the bath room well next thing i know i hear a shreaking scream that would have sent any man woman and child running for help or cover..... I come flying around the corner and every other regualr to see what the hell is going on, turns out the elegant lady had opened the bathroom door only to the puurto rican broad playing with herself and her two units both penis and snatch spread eagle on the bathroom floor. The prissy women is running around hysterically yelling

"THERES A MAN, SHES A MAN, HE/SHE SHE/HE IT HAS A PENIS!!! for about 10 minutes.. the regualrs are laughing there ass of becuase they knew about her and her talented two units.

I am taking this all in as shock and hysterically i dont know whther to help her out or piss my pants...
After the drunk "SHIM" sobers up she comes out and everyone is trying to keep a straigh face only to have me bust out hysterically because i couldnt hold it in anylonger and the whole bar is rolling and she has no clue what happened.

Well the elegant lady walks up to "SHIM" and says "Dude" I mean "mam" I am so sorry i didnt know you were in there... Puertorican yells out loud "YUM YUM GIVE ME SOME" well now its a trademarked phrase by our bar...

Well story keeps going eventually everyone leaves and just me and this hippy guy and a cose coworker of the owner of the place who does the Lakers Arena Stats Board, Big Screen stuff the Peurto rican is almost passed out on a table and I am almost closed down and I am like I AINT goin over there... lol

So finally after sitting around and waiting it out place is dead just mean and her so finally she gets up and says let me just go to the bathroom

well 5 minutes turns into 10 minutes then into 15 minutes by then I am pacing back and forth going oh shit shes wacking offf or doing what ever she does and I have to get her out... So i knock on the door, once, twice HEY WE ARE CLOSING DOWN can u plase finish up and get out so we can lock up...


STILL NO response another 10 minutes has passed and I am like i aint bsuting down that door it sure as hell isnt a door with a prize behind it!

I start poumnding on the door and only to find out by listening to the door shes snoring in the bathroom...

as u can picture me walking around the bar cursing fuck shitm, fuck shit, waht the hell am i gonna do now who knows what shes doing behind that door naked, clothed?

Well a lady walks in and is like can i use the bathroom real fast and I think to myself real fast and am like "sure" " i think no ones in there..." NOT!!!

Well somehow the door got unlocked from when i was beating on the door to wake her ass up and she opens the door and shes freaked!!!! again passed out on the floor pants around ankles and after the chcick settles down she gets shim out of the bar and I go back to friends palce with all the 8 girls that came over and couldnt even think about trying think about chicks in the right frame of mind!


Well now i am home and somehow i need to find a way to sleep without dreaming of this night ever again , unfortunately i dont think it will happen... :-(


Well thats my shitty night! oh yea its on the security cameras so hoping to get a copy for vegas lol


Keev

Dafey

ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Bastii

could you send me a copy plz


email @ [email protected]

Jamdin

I couldn't get past the knights. Were did they go to? I'm sure they would have love have a wack with "her."


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