ElvisManson

> >>Think you've had a bad day at work!
> >
> >
> >True Story:
> >
> >Brian is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers out of Louisiana
>
> >and performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an
> >e-mail he sent to his sister. She sent it to Laughline and won the
> contest
> >(he wasn't thrilled with her for that one). Anyway, anytime you think you
>
> >have had a bad day at the office, remember this guy.
> >
> >April 1998
> >
> >Hi, Sue,
> >
> >Just another note from your bottom dwelling brother. Last week I had a
> bad
> >day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I
> >thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so
>
> >bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must
> bore
>
> >you with a few technicalities of my job.
> >
> >This time of year the water is quite cool, even with a wetsuit. So what
> we
> >do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water
> heater.
> >This $20,000 piece of shit sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to
> a
>
> >delightful temp. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose
>
> >which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a damn good plan,
> and
> >I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to
> the
>
> >bottom and start working, is I take the hose and stuff it down the back
> of
> >my neck. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in
> a
> >Jacuzzi.
> >
> >Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my ass started to itch.
> So,
> >of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few
> seconds
> >my ass started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the
> damage
> >was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine
> had
> >sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. This is even worse than
>
> >the poison ivy you once had under a cast. Now I had that hose down my
> back.
>
> >I don't have any hair on my back, so the jellyfish couldn't get stuck to
> my
>
> >back. My ass crack was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought
> was
> >an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into my ass.
> >
> >I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His
> >instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with 5 other
> >divers, were laughing hysterically. Needless to say, I aborted the dive.
> It
>
> >totaled 35 minutes before I could come to the surface for my chamber dry
> >decompression. I got to the surface wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
> >My suit and gear were tied to the bell. When I got on board the medic,
> with
>
> >tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and
> told
>
> >me to shove it "up my ass" when I get in the chamber. The cream put the
> fire
> >out, But I couldn't shit for two days because my asshole was
> >swollen shut.
> >
> >Anyway, the next time you have a bad day at the office, think of me.
> Think
> >about how much worse your day could be if you were to shove a jellyfish
> up
> >your ass. I hope you have no bad days at the office. But if you do, I
> hope
> >this will make it more tolerable.

------------------
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RedShoe

ouch! That's gotta hurt. I wonder why they woudln't filter where they suck the water from?

Juicy D. Links

Damb and i thought not getting good sales of a listing at al4a was bad.....Could be worse:-)