My wife is out of town.

:Graucho :Graucho

How peculiar. I have never met my father. Mom says it was the guy next door to her place 25 years ago. He was a married man. That cocksucker, I wish I could meet the bastard and beat him.


Now, for the random fact:
I took my original tattoo when I was in the army, on leave drunk as fuck. I haven't regretted it, but I have had it enhanced.

I am a compulsive liar.

:(

Seriously though, my daughter's mother took off three years ago and hasn't even called to say hello to her, or to even let her know if she is alive.

Fucking stupid bitch.:BangBang:

Her father did the same thing to her when she was young, moved out of the country, then called back when she was a teenager saying how much he missed her. Seems it is a vicious circle with some people.

that sucks .. is your daughter living with you ?

Ya, she's 10 now. After the first year you could tell she was still expecting a phone call or something on birthdays and whatnot, but now she appears to have moved on like her mother is dead. (she could be for all I know)

Hopefully she never comes back, because she was manic depressive and managed to bring everyone around her down into her world of shit.

I am a funeral director and embalm dead bodies.

im addicted to tekken tag....... (any of the tekken games to be honest)

I love to day dream

That was one of my childhood dream,s to becme a funeral director lol Yeah I also love the goriest stuff I can find... :thumbsup

far as a fact of mine... I was working in Denver in the summer of 1990 and due to a little negligence and a LOT of product liability I lost all 10 toes to a 16 horsepower, 36 inch commercial mower like this one but without all the safety stuff on it Old mower lol

http://www.allenlawnmower.com/bobcat.mower.gif

2 of my cousins are famous

andy pettitte
lance bass


edit: 50 facts

im fat.

I have no cavities, but one 1" titanium implant in my lower jaw.

I don't use nailclippers, only scissors. I seem to have a phobia of clippers..

I'm VERY shy around girls.


Also, I used to be a Radio MC...


ironic isnt it?

That sucks....but I just got an amazing amount of respect for you for stepping up. :thumbsup

Wow! Did they reattach them? Isn't it hard to balance without your toes?

I've done stand-up comedy.

I spent some time visiting a friend at Colgate university during the fraturnity rush, and they nominated me to the frat. Delta Upsilon. They still have my hat in the Delta Upsilon house at Colgate :)

Nope too much damage. We had just sharpened the blades that morning :1orglaugh I have prostetics in my shoes that help with balance. But if you guys ever meet me and some of ya will some day dont be shocked if I start walking funny for a minute trying to re-balance :thumbsup

i like pie

My son has a prosthetic leg and his brothers like to hide it from him.

im a fire crotch

Sometimes my anus itches. I believe it's a touch of internal hemorrhoids. Getting older sucks ...

I got married when I was 20 and they wouldn't give me my complimentary bottle of Champagne that went with the honeymoon suite :(

:1orglaugh

Ivy

I was born in the Chinese Year of the Fire Horse. :)

I feel out of a helicopter once.

I smoke too much.

I've got a hooooooole in me pocket. :1orglaugh

I went bald at 20.

please god tell me you dont eat that on the same sandwich

I love to climb to mountain tops and smoke weed..it's like religion
:stoned

i'm a skinny - fat person

damn, was it on the ground at the time :1orglaugh

I often internet from the shitter, wirelessly, on my laptop.

I failed my drivers license test the first time.

When I'm hungover I like to watch chick flicks and cry.

LOL! True story! :)

DH

There is an abundance of hair in my asscrack.

I was a commercial print model and even did some runway work for about 6 months in college.


no shit!

I pushed an abandoned car over some railway tracks and left it there when I was 16.