The Last Person to ever post is this Thread wins $250 (paypal)

[Nanda]

An old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day. The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail. The cowboy then moved slowly to the back of his horse, lifted its tail, and placed a big kiss where the sun don't shine. He dropped the horse's tail, stepped up on the walk and aimed toward the swinging doors of the saloon.
"Hold on there, Mister," said the sheriff. "Did I just see what I think I saw?"

"Reckon you did, Sheriff. I got me some powerful chapped lips."

"And that cures them?" the Sheriff asked.

"Nope, but it keeps me from lickin' 'em."

[Jolly Rancher]

Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a guy?

[Nanda]

You might be a redneck if you mow your grass and find three cars.

You might be a redneck if you think the first four words of the national anthem are, ''Gentlemen start your engines''.

[Nanda]

Q: What is a double-wide salad?
A: It's for people who can't afford a house salad.

[DR_PHIL]

ohh! a new bot

[SlickRick]

Originally posted by Nanda
You know you're a redneck when the biggest city you've been to is Wal-Mart.

Hey
Nanda get your own thing Jolly Rancher has the blonde jokes I got the you know your a redneck...I didnt steal blonde jokes from JR. dont steal the redneck from me lol

[Nanda]

You know you're a redneck if you have sex ed and drivers ed in the same car.

[SlickRick]

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . your favorite meals on Dagoba incorporate native snakes.

[SlickRick]

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you have fuzzy dice hanging in the cockpit of your X-Wing.

[Nanda]

Originally posted by SlickRick
Hey
Nanda get your own thing Jolly Rancher has the blonde jokes I got the you know your a redneck...I didnt steal blonde jokes from JR. dont steal the redneck from me lol

LOL...I wasn't stealing them from u hun...Ok

A high school teacher reminded her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being there tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family - but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!"

A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"

The entire class did its best to stifle their laughter and snickering. When silence was restored, the teacher smiled sympathetically at the student, shook her head, and sweetly said, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

It took 15 minutes for the class to come to order.......

[SlickRick]

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you've asked an Ewok to help you go coon hunting.

[italianninja]

Sorry, this topic is now closed, no more posts allowed. Not even to say how sorry you are to see the thread go!

[plyndrty]

[Nanda]

Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence.

[Nanda]

Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached