soooo... anyone play in the poker tournys today?

yeah lookin like it

Q. What is the difference between politicians and stoners ?







A. Politicians don't inhale...they just suck.

Well your doing a good job :thumbsup

Two stoners were walking and saw a fly on a pile of crap.

One stoner says to the other- Wow he had to go bad.

I was going to answer, that!

Play for my first time tonite in the MP tourny
came in 65th I suck at poker

The stoner went to a bar. He has'nt had any nookie in awhile. He saw this chick leaning on the cigarette machine in a dark corner and decided to talk to her. Hey baby i know this is a little forward but i dont get out much so im willing to take a chance. Why dont me and you go to your place and get stoned, maybe cuddle and make a little whoopie. She looked up at the stoner and said - I cant right now, im on my menstrual cycle. The stoner scratched his head and thought for a second - it's ok I'll follow you, I'm on my honda

A certain college professor was notorious for getting off the topic of the lecture, and on to his favourite subject: the evils of marijuana. Off he went one day into his inventory of horrors, "Used regularly," he explained," pot can cause psychic disorientation, sterility, cancer and castration!"

Now wait a minute, professor," interrupted a student. "Castration? Now that's absurd!"

"Yes young man, it's sadly true," replied the professor smugly. "Just suppose your girlfriend gets the munchies!"

haha

A stoner called the fire department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!"
The Fireman asked "How do we get there?"





The stoner says "DUH, the big red truck!"

Going to sleep, night people.

If there happens to be a winner, email me. or bump this tonight until there is a winner.

Goodnite dude
I'll let ya know when I win :winkwink:

There's a stoner and a super genius sitting on a bench waiting on a bus. The genius gets bored, leans over to the stoner and says, "Hey I'll tell you what, I'll ask you a question and if you don't know the answer you have to give me five bucks. If you ask me a question and I don't know the answer I have to give you fifty bucks." The stoner says, "Alright, Man." The genius asks the stoner, "What is the Pythagorian Theory?" The stoner replies, "I don't know," and hands the genius five bucks. "Okay," the stoner says, "What has three legs going up a hill and four legs going down?" The genius thinks real hard and finally gives up. he hands the stoner fifty bucks and then asks, "So, what is the answer?" The stoner says, "I don't know," and hands the genius five bucks.

These three guys die in a car wreck and they all go to Hell. When they arrive the Devil asks each of the men what their sin was.

The first guy says, "It's gotta be the booze. I'm always drunk."

The Devil decides to lock him in a room with nothing but shelves of every kind of alcohol imaginable.

The guy's thinking, "Fuck yeah! Look at all this alcohol!" and runs into the room.

The second guy says, "It's the women, i could never stay faithful to my wife."

The devil opens up the second door and inside is nothing but the finest looking naked women as far as the eye can see. The guy was to be locked in for 100 years. He couldn't believe it and his dick got instantly hard and he went running into the room as the Devil locked the door behind him.

The third dude says, "It's gotta be the bud. I'm always tokin' up."

The Devil opens the third door to reveal nothing but fields of 10ft tall icky, sticky, take-a-toke, make-ya-choke, chronic, green, death bud. The stoner can't believe it. he goes in and takes a seat Indian style with his back to the door and the Devil shuts and locks the door.

One hundred years pass and the Devil returns to check on the three men.

He opens the first door and the man comes crawling out. He's got an empty bottle in one hand, he's completely naked, hasn't shaved or showered in years, and is covered in his own puke, shit, and piss. "i'll never drink again!" he says.

The devil says it's good he learned something and decides to give him a second shot at life.

The devil then opens the second door and the man comes running out twice as fast as when he went in. "I'm fucking gay!" he screams.

The devil figures he's learned not to cheat on his wife and decides to give him a second chance too.

The devil then comes to the third door. he opens it and sees nothing has changed. the stoner is still sitting there in the same position that he was 100 years ago.

The Devil asks him if he's learned anything.

The stoner turns around as a tear rolls down his cheek, "You gotta light, man?"

?Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of good weed.?

never had the patience to figure out how to roll those things ;p

http://www.nero-x.net/b.jpg

nice setup :thumbsup

gimme some weed!

we can't have this thread dead...

Everyone gone?

:winkwink:

I guess I'm all alone..........HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO:(

:Graucho

"I was all by myself......no one was looking......I was thinking of you"

--Greenday--

shit.....only like 350 more post till I win

i want to toke more then anyone i want so much i cannot stand i want to float across the sea of tranquilty with a j at

Smoke dope eat soap and fly home in a bubble

:helpme

Blunts: its a lungfull of fun

:stoned sleepy time 4 me

If the ocean were weed, and I was a duck, I'd swim to the bottom, and smoke my way up.. But the ocean aint weed, and I aint a duck, so pass the bong and shut the fuk up

Blunts: can't we all just get a bong?

blaze one for the nation

proud sponcers of the snack food industry