Why change your car's oil when your girlfriend can do it ? - GoFuckYourself.com

DarkJedi · 04-02-2003, 11:52 AM

So I was sitting there the other day watching my girlfriend change the oil in my car, and I was getting pissed because she kept struggling when she tried to unscrew the filter. I was even more pissed than usual because I was playing videogames as I supervised her from inside the house, until I finally had to put the controller down and go outside to yell at her.

I stood out there in my underwear on a Saturday morning screaming at the top of my lungs. Then my neighbor, who's a total pussy, comes by and says "you shouldn't be yelling at your girlfriend like that." I wasn't going to stand there and just take it, so I socked him one right in the colon. His wife was bringing groceries inside when this happened, and as if it wasn't bad enough that I had to stop playing video games to go outside and yell, now this bitch was screaming at me like it was my fault.

I couldn't understand what she was shrieking about, as she was flapping her arms in the air and screaming. She started crying when she saw the busted colon I gave her pussy husband, so she took one of her shoes off and threw it at me. I caught the shoe between my pecs and I started to laugh like a pirate. Then she started walking towards me to take her shoe back, and there was no way I was going to let this bitch get near my chest so I body slammed her into a cactus that happened to be there. She got up and was uglier than before, so I did what I always do when women start to cry: I went back inside to play video games.

That wasn't the end of it though, it turns out the cranky old hag across the street saw all of this going on, so she came over to do what women do best: bitch. When I opened the door she was standing there in a partly transparent night gown, and it totally ruined the prospect of having a boner for at least 50 years. I was just starting to change my mind about the night gown when she started screeching at me and her stupid cat that she was holding started to hiss. So I took the cat and punted it over my neighbor's fence. She started crying "oh no! My cat! What have you done with my cat?!" I was laughing my ass off, then the bitch tried to scratch me so I gave her a round house kick and dislocated her hip. I was laughing so hard I shit my pants.

Jakke PNG · 04-02-2003, 11:54 AM

I won't let my bitch touch my car. She can stay inside and do the dishes.

Juicy D. Links · 04-02-2003, 11:55 AM

Tell your bitch to come over and clean my house after shes done

iroc409 · 04-02-2003, 11:59 AM

i've heard this before, but i can't remember where...

Sappy · 04-02-2003, 12:11 PM

http://maddox.xmission.com/oil.html

Dildozer · 04-02-2003, 12:21 PM

hahahaha funny shit

traffic addict · 04-02-2003, 12:26 PM

Yo Adrian · 04-02-2003, 12:29 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by TeenGodFather
I won't let my bitch touch my car. She can stay inside and do the dishes.

LOL I'd like to see you tell HER this

DearAbby · 04-02-2003, 12:31 PM

alias · 04-02-2003, 12:39 PM

haha

KrazieSweets · 04-02-2003, 12:58 PM

kad · 04-02-2003, 01:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DarkJedi
I caught the shoe between my pecs and I started to laugh like a pirate.

I cant stop laughing at that line!

DarkJedi · 05-24-2003, 04:00 PM

Ironhorse · 05-24-2003, 04:07 PM

Oh man!

pornguy · 05-24-2003, 04:12 PM

I wont even let my wife drive...

When she does go out with out me I worry about my truck.

As for the oil, she thinks crisco will do just fine.

Raunchybids · 05-24-2003, 04:14 PM

AngelAllgood · 05-24-2003, 04:24 PM

AdultNex · 05-24-2003, 05:08 PM

LOL at an old, dead, buried thread.

DarkJedi · 08-05-2003, 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by TeenGodFather
I won't let my bitch touch my car. She can stay inside and do the dishes.

hmmm...good point

Holly · 08-05-2003, 12:54 PM

I love him so much.

Spunky · 08-05-2003, 01:03 PM

SexxxyChat-T · 08-05-2003, 01:08 PM

I think Maddox is funny as hell, but I have friends who I consider to have a twisted sense of humor who don't get him.

Fuck them, making fun of kids drawings and stories like this one rule... Maddox rocks your face

Seb From Holland · 08-05-2003, 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by TeenGodFather
I won't let my bitch touch my car. She can stay inside and do the dishes.

Dude you haven't even got a car anymore!!

I thought it was stolen.. right?

Seb.

asuna · 08-05-2003, 01:12 PM

ding ding here comes the shit mobile

StuartD · 08-05-2003, 01:16 PM

how do you shit your pants when you're standing there in your underwear?

04-02-2003, 11:52 AM	#1
DarkJedi No Refunds Issued. Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: GFY Posts: 28,300	Why change your car's oil when your girlfriend can do it ? So I was sitting there the other day watching my girlfriend change the oil in my car, and I was getting pissed because she kept struggling when she tried to unscrew the filter. I was even more pissed than usual because I was playing videogames as I supervised her from inside the house, until I finally had to put the controller down and go outside to yell at her. I stood out there in my underwear on a Saturday morning screaming at the top of my lungs. Then my neighbor, who's a total pussy, comes by and says "you shouldn't be yelling at your girlfriend like that." I wasn't going to stand there and just take it, so I socked him one right in the colon. His wife was bringing groceries inside when this happened, and as if it wasn't bad enough that I had to stop playing video games to go outside and yell, now this bitch was screaming at me like it was my fault. I couldn't understand what she was shrieking about, as she was flapping her arms in the air and screaming. She started crying when she saw the busted colon I gave her pussy husband, so she took one of her shoes off and threw it at me. I caught the shoe between my pecs and I started to laugh like a pirate. Then she started walking towards me to take her shoe back, and there was no way I was going to let this bitch get near my chest so I body slammed her into a cactus that happened to be there. She got up and was uglier than before, so I did what I always do when women start to cry: I went back inside to play video games. That wasn't the end of it though, it turns out the cranky old hag across the street saw all of this going on, so she came over to do what women do best: bitch. When I opened the door she was standing there in a partly transparent night gown, and it totally ruined the prospect of having a boner for at least 50 years. I was just starting to change my mind about the night gown when she started screeching at me and her stupid cat that she was holding started to hiss. So I took the cat and punted it over my neighbor's fence. She started crying "oh no! My cat! What have you done with my cat?!" I was laughing my ass off, then the bitch tried to scratch me so I gave her a round house kick and dislocated her hip. I was laughing so hard I shit my pants.

04-02-2003, 11:54 AM	#2
Jakke PNG ex-TeenGodFather Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Suomi Finland Perkele Posts: 20,306	I won't let my bitch touch my car. She can stay inside and do the dishes. __________________ ..and I'm off.

04-02-2003, 11:59 AM	#4
iroc409 Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: midwest side, yo Posts: 4,728	i've heard this before, but i can't remember where... __________________ <a href="http://www.iroc409.com/"><img src="http://www.iroc409.com/adv/120x60.gif" border=0></a> icq: 1 7 6 4 2 0 9 6 0 Gallery templates for ONLY $25! w00t!

04-02-2003, 12:21 PM	#6
Dildozer Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Montreal Posts: 7,519	hahahaha funny shit __________________ Spam link here

04-02-2003, 12:26 PM	#7
traffic addict Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: UK Posts: 3,312	LOL __________________ Get the best payout with the best promotional tools out there

04-02-2003, 11:55 AM	#3
Juicy D. Links So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: N.Y. -Long Island -- Posts: 122,992	Tell your bitch to come over and clean my house after shes done

04-02-2003, 12:11 PM	#5
Sappy Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 460	http://maddox.xmission.com/oil.html

04-02-2003, 12:31 PM	#9
DearAbby Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: NoCal Posts: 979

04-02-2003, 12:39 PM	#10
alias aliasx Join Date: Apr 2001 Posts: 19,010	haha __________________ https://porncorporation.com

04-02-2003, 12:58 PM	#11
KrazieSweets So Fucking Banned Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Southern California Posts: 1,060

05-24-2003, 04:00 PM	#13
DarkJedi No Refunds Issued. Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: GFY Posts: 28,300	LOL

05-24-2003, 04:07 PM	#14
Ironhorse Pixel Pusher Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 7,094	Oh man! __________________ [email protected]

05-24-2003, 04:12 PM	#15
pornguy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Homeless Posts: 62,911	I wont even let my wife drive... When she does go out with out me I worry about my truck. As for the oil, she thinks crisco will do just fine. __________________ PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online! TChicks.com \| Angeles Cid \| Mariana Cordoba \| MAILERS WELCOME!

05-24-2003, 04:14 PM	#16
Raunchybids Registered User Join Date: May 2003 Location: Florida Posts: 77	__________________ Sig too big

05-24-2003, 04:24 PM	#17
AngelAllgood Confirmed User Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 295	__________________ PG4L

05-24-2003, 05:08 PM	#18
AdultNex Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Bostonnnn Posts: 8,985	LOL at an old, dead, buried thread.

08-05-2003, 12:54 PM	#20
Holly Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Jesusland Posts: 10,017	I love him so much. __________________ War National Damn Champions Eagle

08-05-2003, 01:03 PM	#21
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,949	__________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

08-05-2003, 01:08 PM	#22
SexxxyChat-T Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Las Vegas, NV Posts: 697	I think Maddox is funny as hell, but I have friends who I consider to have a twisted sense of humor who don't get him. Fuck them, making fun of kids drawings and stories like this one rule... Maddox rocks your face __________________ Need more cowbell? Then offer SexxxyChat live webcam feeds to your customers! Make up to 35% of all sales, $30 on first purchase, or $10 per signup

08-05-2003, 01:12 PM	#24
asuna Confirmed User Join Date: May 2002 Location: Montreal Posts: 8,743	ding ding here comes the shit mobile __________________

08-05-2003, 01:16 PM	#25
StuartD Sofa King Band Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Outside the box Posts: 29,903	how do you shit your pants when you're standing there in your underwear? __________________ This is me on facebook This is me on twitter