whats the best excuse you've ever heard for being late?

[Grapesoda]

I heard a guy say: I had a personal hygiene emergency

[SBJ]

30 years ago I worked at a factory. This was before porn and I was living in Indiana and we had an ice storm. I had an old POS Honda that both doors were frozen shut. I literally broke one of the plastic door handles off pulling so hard. I took the door handle in with me when I was 15 mins late and they thought it was funny

[Sly]

30 years ago I worked at a factory. This was before porn and I was living in Indiana and we had an ice storm. I had an old POS Honda that both doors were frozen shut. I literally broke one of the plastic door handles off pulling so hard. I took the door handle in with me when I was 15 mins late and they thought it was funny

Always keep a hairdryer handy!

[kane]

Back in the early 1990's a co-worker came in one day about 45 minutes late. When he walked in he said, "Sorry I'm late. I was naked." No further explanation.

[SBJ]

Always keep a hairdryer handy!

This was 1992 (the winter my daughter was born) and I don't even know if I had one back then. This was my 1st house and the only one I've ever lived in without a garage. I think I ended up throwing warm water on the door

[King Mark]

I didn't show up to work one day because the street in my neighborhood was just solid ice. It rained all day the day before and it all froze to the ground that night and stayed that way. Car had a solid ice covering. I wasn't doing it. This was before phones had cameras and apparently this only happened in my neighborhood only, so they didn't believe me.

Fuck them.

[CaptainHowdy]

I'm an englishman (at heart), there are no bloody excuses for being late.

[Grapesoda]

On time is late

[Grapesoda]

I knew guy that was some kind of archeologist, him and his buddies went down to Mexico for a dig, oddly enough the news articul was written before they left. They got to a whorehouse and stayed drunk for a week and went home.

[The Porn Nerd]

"I thought I took the pill honey..."

[ruff]

There's time and there's Miami time. Everyone is late in Miami, it's a point of pride.

[Lexi BongaCash]

I heard a guy say: I had a personal hygiene emergency

Haha simple but genius

[Grapesoda]

yeah, nobody asked what it was lol!

[celandina]

Being late for school ( about grade 3) I have faked my dads note where it stated:

" My son was late because he suffered Myocardial infarct"

( we had an encyclopedia at home )

[SilentKnight]

A business associate who was late with our revenue cheque had the excuse he had to pay his own income taxes first.

With our earnings.

[Grapesoda]

( we had an encyclopedia at home )

the good old days for sure

[george MH]

I was sleeping

[PornDude]

My niece accidentally deep fried her arm, so I have to take her to the hospital.

[Nookster]

I was being tested for COVID-19. This just happened. I was told to not come in for the rest of the week. I was just doing due-diligence, damn!

[Grapesoda]

My niece accidentally deep fried her arm, so I have to take her to the hospital.

sometimes I say my cat got in the microwave

[Nookster]

I was being tested for COVID-19. This just happened. I was told to not come in for the rest of the week. I was just doing due-diligence, damn!

Bunch of weaklings. No retort.

[Nookster]

Looking for work. PHP/Laravel Linux manufacturing mofo here for hire.

[klinton]

A business associate who was late with our revenue cheque had the excuse he had to pay his own income taxes first.

With our earnings.

[notinmybackyard]

Best excuse for being late...

The condomS slipped off and they spilled inside me. So I'm probably pregnant with some guy's baby.

Funny thing is this happened in her private life and not on a set.

[Brit in Cambodia]

The flight from Phnom penh to Phillipenes was delayed

I met this business associate in London he assumed I'd come from South east England not south east asia. Barely any sleep but only turned up 10 minutes late. Promptly flew back 2 days later.