From an old thread I posted in about being in jail....

County Jail Ramen Smorgasboard:

Ingredients - 30 packets of top ramen, 10 bags of assorted flavor dorito's, a handful of sausage sticks, saltine crackers, some seasoning packets, and a shitload of string cheese.

Step #1 - Open the top ramens and dump in a large size black garbage bag.

Step #2 - Turn on cell shower. Wait until the water reaches its maximum (lukewarm) temperature.

Step #3 - Hold garbage bag under shower until ramen is completely covered, tie off the bag, and let soak.

Step #4 - Open all chips, sausages, seasoning packets and string cheese.

Step #5 - When Ramen is soft, punch small holes in bag with pen to let shower water out.

Step #6 - Dump chips, sausages, seasoning & cheese into bag. Shake, then let sit for 5 more minutes.

Serve in plastic jailhouse coffee cups and eat with fingers.

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50, bitch.

damn that sounds horrible hahahaha

and there's always those raid grandma's fridge missions, and she keeps the moonshine under the sink. hehe

and have you ever been really broke, and went to get fast food with say your last $20, and get your food and change back before you even pay them? hahahaha I've had this happen a couple times at least.... make away with a free lunch and about 8 bucks. Nothing is better than that.

Time is money in this business.

I just eat stuff I find on the ground. :xomunch

When I was *really* broke we'd do store runs.

My brother, myself and the other dude who lived with us would pile in the pickup and drive to a 24hr supermarket. The ones in good neighborhoods always worked best, and we'd go at 2-3am when the store was on a skeleton crew with only a couple of stockers working.

One person stayed in the truck, and the two who went in would load up 4 shopping baskets with whatever we wanted and hit the door running.

We'd grab a weeks worth of food in one shot that way.

Gutterboy, you must have really hated prison food to resort to the trashbag/ramen mixture. God, that sounds gross! I think I would prefer a midnight run at the local grocery store.

That Ramen concoction tasted fucking fabulous after 2 weeks of the shit they were feeding us. Stale bread, rancid margarine for breakfast.. just hideous. The ramen stuff was ok because we could buy it ourselves, I think you could order $50 worth of shit a week from the Comissary, so we'd pool it and eat a bit better at night.

That jail (the old San Mateo County Jail) was closed about a month after I got transferred to a minimum security farm because of the inhumane conditions.

I lived on Stove Top stuffing in college. Less than $1.50 per serving.

Porridge.
1.50? pack lasts almost a week.

God damn, poor people suck.