Dear Abby, I'm a bigot and the other kids won't play with me

[Sly]

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I relocated to Florida a little over a year ago and were quickly welcomed into our new neighbors' social whirl. Two couples in the neighborhood are gay -- one male, one female. While they are nice enough, my husband and I did not include them when it was our turn to host because we do not approve of their lifestyle choices. Since then, we have been excluded from neighborhood gatherings, and someone even suggested that we are bigots!

Abby, we moved here from a conservative community where people were pretty much the same. If people were "different," they apparently kept it to themselves. While I understand the phrase "when in Rome," I don't feel we should have to compromise our values just to win the approval of our neighbors. But really, who is the true bigot here? Would you like to weigh in? -- UNHAPPY IN TAMPA

DEAR UNHAPPY: I sure would. The first thing I'd like to say is that regardless of what you were told in your previous community, a person's sexual orientation isn't a "lifestyle choice." Gay people don't choose to be gay; they are born that way. They can't change being gay any more than you can change being heterosexual.

I find it interesting that you are unwilling to reciprocate the hospitality of people who welcomed you and opened their homes to you, and yet you complain because you are receiving similar treatment.

From where I sit, you may have chosen the wrong place to live because it appears you would be happier in a less integrated neighborhood surrounded by people who think the way you do. But if you interact only with people like yourselves, you will have missed a chance for growth, which is what you have been offered here. Please don't blow it.

[Rochard]

I don't hate anyone. I love having friends that are different than me.

[Tom_PM]

Perfect reply.

People on the wrong side of history sure look funny trying to keep their grip on the past.

[fuzebox]

Originally Posted by Tom_PM

People on the wrong side of history sure look funny trying to keep their grip on the past.

Great way to put it

[sperbonzo]

I bet this turns out to be yet another in the line of recent "anti-gay" hoaxes. (e.g. the lesbian waitress "no tip" hoax, the mother rejecting the childs party invitation hoax, the lesbian couple spay painting slurs on their own garage hoax, etc, etc, etc...)









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[VikingMan]

I imagine these people are Christian if they "did not approve of the gay lifestyle". If so then they should invite gay people to their homes if they want to live a live like Jesus Christ lived. Based on what I know about the life of Jesus was that he would invite people of all walks of life including prostitutes. Many Christians probably would not invite Jesus to their home either if he was alive to day because they would not approve of someone who would associate in any way with prostitutes.

[deltav]

Originally Posted by sperbonzo

I bet this turns out to be yet another in the line of recent "anti-gay" hoaxes. (e.g. the lesbian waitress "no tip" hoax, the mother rejecting the childs party invitation hoax, the lesbian couple spay painting slurs on their own garage hoax, etc, etc, etc...).

Riiight, because most anti-homosexual discriminations are actually hoaxes designed to create sympathy for those damn gays.

Some real gems of humanity on GFY, I tell ya...

[RubyGoodnight]

Originally Posted by sperbonzo

I bet this turns out to be yet another in the line of recent "anti-gay" hoaxes. (e.g. the lesbian waitress "no tip" hoax, the mother rejecting the childs party invitation hoax, the lesbian couple spay painting slurs on their own garage hoax, etc, etc, etc...)

Did this one turn out to be a hoax? I heard about the waitress thing and how that blew up in her face.

[sperbonzo]

Originally Posted by deltav

Riiight, because most anti-homosexual discriminations are actually hoaxes designed to create sympathy for those damn gays.

Some real gems of humanity on GFY, I tell ya...

Seriously? No one should DARE to question whether a story is true?

So if I hold back initial judgement regarding the validity of something running around the internet, in light of the fact that there has been a recent string of hoaxes, (that everyone has run around repeating without verification, and then shut up about when they turn out to be false), then there is something wrong with me and I"m a terrible person?

What is wrong with you, that you so blindly think that everything online is true, in spite of so many recent stories just like this one that turned out to be false?









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[Mediamix]

Originally Posted by Tom_PM

Perfect reply.

People on the wrong side of history sure look funny trying to keep their grip on the past.

Awesome comment!

[sperbonzo]

Originally Posted by RubyGoodnight

Did this one turn out to be a hoax? I heard about the waitress thing and how that blew up in her face.

Yes, this was a hoax

http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Journal...e-a-Radio-Hoax

http://www.k983.com/morning-show/201...m-steve-leeana




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[Sly]

Originally Posted by sperbonzo

Seriously? No one should DARE to question whether a story is true?

So if I hold back initial judgement regarding the validity of something running around the internet, in light of the fact that there has been a recent string of hoaxes, (that everyone has run around repeating without verification, and then shut up about when they turn out to be false), then there is something wrong with me and I"m a terrible person?

What is wrong with you, that you so blindly think that everything online is true, in spite of so many recent stories just like this one that turned out to be false?









.

Except you didn't hold back your judgment. Your response was: I bet this turns out to be yet another in the line of recent "anti-gay" hoaxes.

"I bet."

You have already placed judgment.

So what is worse, someone blindly taking it as true or someone blindly taking it as false?

I'm in the bi-camp of "it could go either way," but I thought Abby had a nice response whether true or false.

[TheSquealer]

Disappointed in you Sly,... you gave your word that you would stop writing in to Dear Abby

[deltav]

Originally Posted by sperbonzo

Seriously? No one should DARE to question whether a story is true?

So if I hold back initial judgement regarding the validity of something running around the internet, in light of the fact that there has been a recent string of hoaxes, (that everyone has run around repeating without verification, and then shut up about when they turn out to be false), then there is something wrong with me and I"m a terrible person?

What is wrong with you, that you so blindly think that everything online is true, in spite of so many recent stories just like this one that turned out to be false?

Dude, it's a Dear Abby letter (if it's even a genuine one) - 95% of those are fake anyway.

I'm more commenting on the narrative - usually by people with an axe to grind - that gays are trying to drum up sympathy with anti-gay hoaxes, and then cherry pick literally 2 or 3 isolated cases done by most likely somewhat crazy people.

[sperbonzo]

Originally Posted by Sly

Except you didn't hold back your judgment. Your response was: I bet this turns out to be yet another in the line of recent "anti-gay" hoaxes.

"I bet."

You have already placed judgment.

So what is worse, someone blindly taking it as true or someone blindly taking it as false?

I'm in the bi-camp of "it could go either way," but I thought Abby had a nice response whether true or false.

Fair enough. I also agreed with the response, but the tone of the letter did not come off as real to me on any level.

I guess I just want to balance out the trend to automatically believe every story that shows Americans as being anti-gay, and at the same time to ignore all of the hoaxing going on. There is the lesbian couple that spray painted their own garage with anti-gay slurs, (I think in Texas), the recent events at Vasser college with slurs being painted on peoples doors by a member of the "Bias Response Team" on campus, the lesbian that claimed to have been beaten by 3 men in the northwest, etc, etc... all in the last 6 to 9 months. The original hoaxes are widely reported and totally believed, and then the subsequent disapproval of their validity gets almost no coverage. I just think that the fact is, that the VAST majority of Americans, even the church going christian types, are far more accepting, civil and tolerant than the media wants to admit.







.

[Grapesoda]

Originally Posted by VikingMan

if they want to live a live like Jesus Christ lived.

i.e. be a homeless bum

[dyna mo]

The neighbor's reaction is just as poor, excluding the couple from social events because the couple excluded teh gays from social events. Abbey could have broached that subject as well.