Storage Wars...

It's a tactic by the auctioneer to "hype up the crowd" in an effort to get many bids in...to make it seem like there's lot of activity, even when there's not. Imagine of the auction was dead silent.

fucking fake tv shows

Affiliate programs should do that.

Dear Konrad
We're sorry blurrd-diddly-blur-diddly you did not Rummm-diddly-dee-diddly reach the brummmmmmm-daddy-dummm-braaaaa-diddly minimum payout for this pay period.

more to the point... whats that thing he says at the end... I thought he said something like "alls fair war.... sold to your wife" or something like that

Correct. I have been to many storage unit auctions and most of them are just run by the manager of the facility not an auctioneer. They just stand there and take bids and often the units will go for less money. The auctions I have been to with an auctioneer seem to get more bids and the units went for more because he kept the bidder's attention and creates a sense of urgency.

Auction chant (also known as "bid calling", "the auction cry", "the cattle rattle", or simply "Auctioneering") is a rhythmic repetition of numbers and "filler words" spoken by an auctioneer in the process of conducting an auction. The auction chant is a repetition of two numbers at a time which indicate the monetary amount involved with the sale of an item. The first number is the amount of money which is currently being offered by a bidder for a given item to the chant. It serves as a thinking point for both the auctioneer and the bidders. Typical filler words, which are taught at schools of auctioneering, are "dollar bid", "now", and "will ya' give me?". The typically taught chant for beginning auctioneers using the following pattern: "One dollar bid, now two, now two, will ya' give me two? Two dollar bid, now three, now three, will ya' give me three?", and continues in this fashion until a winning bid is received, usually by saying "Going once, going twice, sold!" or "Going, going, gone!", followed by announcing the winning bid. Slurring filler words to make multi-part filler word phrases is a key element, giving the illusion that the auctioneer is talking fast, and thus creating more excitement and bidding anxiety among the bidding crowd. Once an auctioneer becomes experienced in the auction profession, they usually develop their own style with regards to unique filler words, unique rhythm, and variable speed of delivering the chant. Many chants are accompanied by the unique yelling of a ringman, who is an assistant to the auctioneer in the "auction ring". Ringmen are professionals who are often auctioneers themselves. They assist in spotting bids and communicating essential information back to the auctioneer. Typically automobile auctioneers at dealer only auctions, and livestock auctioneers are known for their high speed chants. Auctioneers also can participate in "competitions" which crown regional and world champion auctioneers based on their chants, which is common in the auto and livestock auction industry, but not limited to them. Ringmen can also compete in competitions. The National Auctioneers Association as well as state specific Auctioneer Associations hold annual Auctioneer "bid calling competitions". These organizations also hold Ringmen competitions. The auction chant is the focus of the 1956 hit song "The Auctioneer" by Leroy Van Dyke.

so wiki says

I'm pissing myself laughing... Its not far off is it? lol

Cool !

I was considering calling up 'Tru-TV' and suggesting the provide him with medical help...

He was distracted by Brandi's tits.

Auctions

I don't know if they're still around, The Missouri School of Auctioneering advertised in national magazines. You could even get a student loan to go there. We used to drink at a bar across the street and on nice days they had the classes in the parking lot. So we'd watch and laugh as they were shown how to reach that hand out to the crowd.
Not only did they learn THE CHANT, a lot of it is the hand gestures.
If you want to sell something you have to pump the crowd.
Friend works at an auction house. You can get great bargains, but you have you make sure you pay attention. It's too damn easy to let the auctioneer get you bidding more than you intended. Just for a pair of $10 cowboy boots I wanted for my GF, the crowd wasn't responding so the auctioneer threw in 3 truckloads of clothes. Ended up paying $50 + gas to get everything home, but there was a fake mink coat in there worth an easy $500.

RULE #1 never go to an auction drunk.

I'm still snickering like Muttly !