Turning Welch?s Grape Juice Into Wine In 48 Hours - GoFuckYourself.com

brassmonkey · 08-30-2012, 03:40 PM

I'm taking the last sip of home-brewed purple liquid. It's sweet yet balanced, fizzy yet quenching, smooth yet these words look a bit blurry. It tastes like a dangerously well-mixed drink. And just 48 short hours ago, it was Welch's.

Yes, good old Welch's Concord Grape Juice. And something about enjoying the beverage in such an adult manner makes my inner child weep.

I haven't touched the stuff since I was 10. Welch's, along with pretty much any processed fruit juice, is just too sugary for me to enjoy. Beyond a stiff margarita, I've found the world of frou frou mixed drinks have been lost on my palate. I don't judge those of you who enjoy all those syrupy, rum-infused rainbows garnished with alcohol, but...I take that back. I do judge you. I'm a booze, juice, food and general topics snob.

But I had to test the claims of Spike Your Juice, a yeast-based kit that ferments any 100% fruit juice, so long as it has 20G of sugar or more per serving, into an alcoholic brew with anywhere from 4-14% ABV. That puts the resulting potency somewhere between beer and wine. With a healthy 30G of sugar per serving, Welch's is a prime candidate for home fermentation.

You add a tiny yeast packet?about the same amount you might add to a bread-loaf of dough?to a 64 oz bottle of juice at room temperature. You ditch the normal cap for an included rubber stopper?one that allows gas to escape the bottle while otherwise keeping an airtight seal. And then you wait.

Apparently, this fast fermentation process is borrowed from the production of Federweißer, a German grape-based booze. Indeed, you can even make an authentic Federweißer with the kit.

Yeast munches on both the fructose and sucrose, then it expels alcohol along with CO2. My bottle of Welch's, as it transcended its forefathers through its alcoholic metamorphosis, fizzed after a bit of waiting. Then, after 24 hours, it bubbled like that slime from Ghostbusters 2.

The substance spilled out the airlock cap onto my counter, rebelling from its family-friendly roots with a new identity all its own.

What had I done?

"I swear you're making poison," my wife warns. I pretend I'm not afraid.

Another day later, and the juice had calmed down, still bubbling incessantly, but with the micro bubbles of champagne rather than the soapy bubbles of painful sequels.

Just an hour ago, I decided to pour a bit on the rocks since it fermented at room temperature. I tentatively sipped, expecting something that I could barely swallow. Instead, I was brought back to my childhood. Grape freezepops, grape sodas, grape jelly...but with a kick at the end. I wouldn't call it a burn, but a microbrew-like presence of alcohol behind the flavor.

After 2 1/2 glasses, it makes for a quick, harsh buzz?akin to the helmet of weight you get around your brow from vodka. There's no way this is 4% ABV?I'd guess it's closer to 8 or 10%.

I don't think I could drink the stuff every day. But I will say this: If Spike Your Juice were around during my childhood, I fear that Welch's concord grape could have had an entirely different connotation. Plus there's no way I'd have ever grown this tall.

Now whoever figures out how to spike peanut butter will be my personal savior.

candyflip · 08-30-2012, 03:41 PM

Where'd you copy and paste that from? No way that's your writing.

brassmonkey · 08-30-2012, 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by candyflip

Where'd you copy and paste that from? No way that's your writing.

i been brewing for a while.

mostly beer its not my article never said it was.

~Ray · 08-30-2012, 04:05 PM

interesting kit

Dirty D · 08-30-2012, 04:07 PM

I love me some Purple

Mr Pheer · 08-30-2012, 04:10 PM

Let us know if your buzz turns into a headache.

I've been brewing beer for a couple of years, but havent attempted a wine yet. The funny thing is that I dont even drink beer, I just enjoy the process and then I give all the beer away.

garce · 08-30-2012, 04:33 PM

That was 100% cut and paste. You are not smart enough to write that well.

At least give credit. Not my article, indeed.

ShoeBox · 08-30-2012, 04:46 PM

Where can i buy the kit to try this out at?

brassmonkey · 08-30-2012, 04:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ShoeBox

Where can i buy the kit to try this out at?

walmart

64oz 100% grape juice
bag of sugar
a balloon make sure to clean it with soapy water
1 pack of yeast

if you have a bigger bottle that's better. just make sure its been cleaned.

in the welches jar take some of the juice out. pour in 2 cups sugar and the yeast packet.
put on the balloon and pokes some holes in it with a pin.

wait 7 days if you want you can drink it after 48hrs ( i would wait)

L-Pink · 08-30-2012, 05:08 PM

So you make that in the Bordeaux region of your basement?

Just Alex · 08-30-2012, 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brassmonkey

walmart

64oz 100% grape juice
bag of sugar
a balloon make sure to clean it with soapy water
1 pack of yeast

if you have a bigger bottle that's better. just make sure its been cleaned.

in the welches jar take some of the juice out. pour in 2 cups sugar and the yeast packet.
put on the balloon and pokes some holes in it with a pin.

wait 7 days if you want you can drink it after 48hrs ( i would wait)

One of the most creative ways of purchasing alcohol with your EBT card.

brassmonkey · 08-30-2012, 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by L-Pink

So you make that in the Bordeaux region of your basement?

i've made it a few times. this is just a simple way. check this out

5 Gallon Fruit Winemaking Add-On Kit

escorpio · 08-30-2012, 07:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

One of the most creative ways of purchasing alcohol with your EBT card.

Free purple drank, y'all.

BIGTYMER · 08-30-2012, 07:58 PM

I'll just buy wine already made.

CyberHustler · 08-30-2012, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

One of the most creative ways of purchasing alcohol with your EBT card.

brassmonkey · 08-30-2012, 08:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BIGTYMER

I'll just buy wine already made.

good for you!

AllAboutCams · 08-30-2012, 08:17 PM

you have any cider recipe i can make some good beer but every time i touch cider it turns to shit

L-Pink · 08-30-2012, 08:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

One of the most creative ways of purchasing alcohol with your EBT card.

.

brassmonkey · 08-30-2012, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AllAboutCams

you have any cider recipe i can make some good beer but every time i touch cider it turns to shit

http://www.instructables.com/id/Home...-from-Scratch/

Penny24Seven · 08-30-2012, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

One of the most creative ways of purchasing alcohol with your EBT card.

LOL sounds like someone getting ready to do time in prison

Just Alex · 08-30-2012, 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CyberHustler

MrBottomTooth · 08-30-2012, 08:33 PM

Does it actually come out tasting OK or does it taste like crap? Seems like it would be horrible.

martinsc · 08-30-2012, 08:38 PM

brassmonkey · 08-30-2012, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrBottomTooth

Does it actually come out tasting OK or does it taste like crap? Seems like it would be horrible.

well it taste ok and you know there are no Sulfites added. Sulfites give you the headache the morning after. i use Champagne Yeast they are the best for me.

Brad Mitchell · 08-30-2012, 09:08 PM

This I have to try. Thanks for sharing... I'll report back someday when I do it!

Brad

CyberHustler · 08-30-2012, 09:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

2012 · 08-30-2012, 09:54 PM

i'll have to remember this the next time I'm in prison, thanks

BIGTYMER · 08-30-2012, 10:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

Bill8 · 08-31-2012, 02:30 AM

when i was growing up pn the farm we kids - teens - made hard cider every fall and most of the way thru the winter.

Temperature was the key - as well as light - you just put the plastic jugs in the root cellar, and depending on how long you waited you got a drink that varied from lightly alcoholic to brutal.

Because it was wild yeasts it sometimes went bad but you could smell the difference.

We did the same with concord grape juice and even made alcoholic root beer. Cider was the best and easiest.

Had to be a bit sneaky about it so the parents didn't find out.

Halloween was fun - perfect temps to do it, lots of cider available.

ottopottomouse · 08-31-2012, 03:41 AM

sauce

Might as well just put vodka in the juice.

Just Alex · 08-31-2012, 08:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BIGTYMER

Just Alex · 08-31-2012, 08:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CyberHustler

where diz da clip, Darrion?

Tom_PM · 08-31-2012, 08:23 AM

Definitely like an "inmate brew". Except I think you normally would use a condom with a tiny pin prick hole to let the CO2 out.

You just have to be sure the juice has REAL sugar or the yeast won't eat it. No fake sweeteners.

pornguy · 08-31-2012, 08:26 AM

Wish they sold that here.

brassmonkey · 08-31-2012, 08:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PR_Tom

Definitely like an "inmate brew". Except I think you normally would use a condom with a tiny pin prick hole to let the CO2 out.

You just have to be sure the juice has REAL sugar or the yeast won't eat it. No fake sweeteners.

how the hell is it a prison drink?? buy a wine making kit some come with 100% grape juice. its up to you what kind of grape juice. ive seen grape juice go up to about $60 for a 750ml

BIGTYMER · 08-31-2012, 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

CyberHustler · 08-31-2012, 08:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

where diz da clip, Darrion?

Right here, Cletus!

Just Alex · 08-31-2012, 09:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BIGTYMER

Just Alex · 08-31-2012, 09:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CyberHustler

Right here, Cletus!

too old.

who de daddy iz?

BIGTYMER · 08-31-2012, 10:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

Just Alex · 08-31-2012, 10:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BIGTYMER

BIGTYMER · 08-31-2012, 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

teennutsuckers · 08-31-2012, 10:49 AM

pure ignorance it's just a wine kit where does racism come in

Just Alex · 08-31-2012, 10:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by teennutsuckers

pure ignorance it's just a wine kit where does racism come in

Who said anything about racism?

Just Alex · 08-31-2012, 10:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BIGTYMER

Tom_PM · 08-31-2012, 11:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brassmonkey

how the hell is it a prison drink?? buy a wine making kit some come with 100% grape juice. its up to you what kind of grape juice. ive seen grape juice go up to about $60 for a 750ml

What I'm saying is that "inmate brew" is a common term used for brews basically made from a bottle of juice, yeast and a hand made airlock. Youtube is packed with inmate brew videos, under that terminology.

I havent done one yet but I've been thinking about it. It'd make a wine cooler type of drink which isn't bad. I've seen videos of a guy using frozen juice concentrate to make wine as well, but more of a full blown process just replacing the juice kit with welches frozen.

brassmonkey · 08-31-2012, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PR_Tom

What I'm saying is that "inmate brew" is a common term used for brews basically made from a bottle of juice, yeast and a hand made airlock. Youtube is packed with inmate brew videos, under that terminology.

I havent done one yet but I've been thinking about it. It'd make a wine cooler type of drink which isn't bad. I've seen videos of a guy using frozen juice concentrate to make wine as well, but more of a full blown process just replacing the juice kit with welches frozen.

well check out prison wine. they put some krazy stuff in it. most people would rather just buy it than learn how to make it. oh and ive seen plenty of the youtube stuff.

V_RocKs · 08-31-2012, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Just Alex

One of the most creative ways of purchasing alcohol with your EBT card.

Fuck yeah!

Just Alex · 08-31-2012, 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PR_Tom

What I'm saying is that "inmate brew" is a common term used for brews basically made from a bottle of juice, yeast and a hand made airlock. Youtube is packed with inmate brew videos, under that terminology.

I havent done one yet but I've been thinking about it. It'd make a wine cooler type of drink which isn't bad. I've seen videos of a guy using frozen juice concentrate to make wine as well, but more of a full blown process just replacing the juice kit with welches frozen.

Word ?inmate? is very touchy issue for some people.

2012 · 08-31-2012, 11:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CyberHustler

Quote:

Originally Posted by CyberHustler

Quote:

Originally Posted by BIGTYMER

Quote:

Originally Posted by BIGTYMER

Quote:

Originally Posted by CyberHustler

Right here, Cletus!

Quote:

Originally Posted by BIGTYMER

Quote:

Originally Posted by BIGTYMER

08-30-2012, 03:40 PM	#1
brassmonkey Pay It Forward Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Yo Mama House Posts: 77,052	Turning Welch?s Grape Juice Into Wine In 48 Hours I'm taking the last sip of home-brewed purple liquid. It's sweet yet balanced, fizzy yet quenching, smooth yet these words look a bit blurry. It tastes like a dangerously well-mixed drink. And just 48 short hours ago, it was Welch's. Yes, good old Welch's Concord Grape Juice. And something about enjoying the beverage in such an adult manner makes my inner child weep. I haven't touched the stuff since I was 10. Welch's, along with pretty much any processed fruit juice, is just too sugary for me to enjoy. Beyond a stiff margarita, I've found the world of frou frou mixed drinks have been lost on my palate. I don't judge those of you who enjoy all those syrupy, rum-infused rainbows garnished with alcohol, but...I take that back. I do judge you. I'm a booze, juice, food and general topics snob. But I had to test the claims of Spike Your Juice, a yeast-based kit that ferments any 100% fruit juice, so long as it has 20G of sugar or more per serving, into an alcoholic brew with anywhere from 4-14% ABV. That puts the resulting potency somewhere between beer and wine. With a healthy 30G of sugar per serving, Welch's is a prime candidate for home fermentation. You add a tiny yeast packet?about the same amount you might add to a bread-loaf of dough?to a 64 oz bottle of juice at room temperature. You ditch the normal cap for an included rubber stopper?one that allows gas to escape the bottle while otherwise keeping an airtight seal. And then you wait. Apparently, this fast fermentation process is borrowed from the production of Federweißer, a German grape-based booze. Indeed, you can even make an authentic Federweißer with the kit. Yeast munches on both the fructose and sucrose, then it expels alcohol along with CO2. My bottle of Welch's, as it transcended its forefathers through its alcoholic metamorphosis, fizzed after a bit of waiting. Then, after 24 hours, it bubbled like that slime from Ghostbusters 2. The substance spilled out the airlock cap onto my counter, rebelling from its family-friendly roots with a new identity all its own. What had I done? "I swear you're making poison," my wife warns. I pretend I'm not afraid. Another day later, and the juice had calmed down, still bubbling incessantly, but with the micro bubbles of champagne rather than the soapy bubbles of painful sequels. Just an hour ago, I decided to pour a bit on the rocks since it fermented at room temperature. I tentatively sipped, expecting something that I could barely swallow. Instead, I was brought back to my childhood. Grape freezepops, grape sodas, grape jelly...but with a kick at the end. I wouldn't call it a burn, but a microbrew-like presence of alcohol behind the flavor. After 2 1/2 glasses, it makes for a quick, harsh buzz?akin to the helmet of weight you get around your brow from vodka. There's no way this is 4% ABV?I'd guess it's closer to 8 or 10%. I don't think I could drink the stuff every day. But I will say this: If Spike Your Juice were around during my childhood, I fear that Welch's concord grape could have had an entirely different connotation. Plus there's no way I'd have ever grown this tall. Now whoever figures out how to spike peanut butter will be my personal savior. __________________ TRUMP 2025 KEKAW!!! - The Laken Riley Act Is Law! DACA ENDED - SUPPORT AZ HCR 2060 52R - email: brassballz-at-techie.com

08-30-2012, 03:41 PM	#2
candyflip Carpe Visio Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: New York Posts: 43,057	Where'd you copy and paste that from? No way that's your writing. __________________ Spend you some brain. Email Me

08-30-2012, 04:05 PM	#4
~Ray visit hardlinks.org Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Las Vegas , Nv >>> [email protected] or icq 94994627 anytime Posts: 18,362	interesting kit __________________ Adult Backlinks for Adult Websites - Testimonials Available

08-30-2012, 04:07 PM	#5
Dirty D Confirmed User Join Date: May 2002 Location: Paying Webmasters Millions Since 1999 Posts: 4,044	I love me some Purple __________________ Dirty D - ICQ #1326843 - $1 Million Dollars of Bonus Money - 8,000+ FHG! Glory Hole Girlz - Crack Whore Confessions - Tampa Bukkake - Slut Wife Training - Fuck a Fan Electricity Play - Porn Video Drive - Theater Sluts - Skunk Riley - Ukraine Amateurs - Strapon Sessions

08-30-2012, 08:17 PM	#17
AllAboutCams Femcams.com Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: bjcam.com Posts: 12,220	you have any cider recipe i can make some good beer but every time i touch cider it turns to shit __________________ Binance - Blockchain and Crypto Asset Exchange Chaturbate make money in cams

08-30-2012, 04:10 PM	#6
Mr Pheer I got bored here. Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 20,803	Let us know if your buzz turns into a headache. I've been brewing beer for a couple of years, but havent attempted a wine yet. The funny thing is that I dont even drink beer, I just enjoy the process and then I give all the beer away.

08-30-2012, 04:33 PM	#7
garce Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Toronto Posts: 7,103	That was 100% cut and paste. You are not smart enough to write that well. At least give credit. Not my article, indeed.

08-30-2012, 04:46 PM	#8
ShoeBox So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: May 2012 Location: Brazil Posts: 2,056	Where can i buy the kit to try this out at?

08-30-2012, 05:08 PM	#10
L-Pink working on my tan Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Florida/Kentucky Posts: 39,151	So you make that in the Bordeaux region of your basement?

08-30-2012, 07:58 PM	#14
BIGTYMER Junior Achiever Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Walled Garden Posts: 17,066	I'll just buy wine already made.

08-30-2012, 08:33 PM	#22
MrBottomTooth Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 5,795	Does it actually come out tasting OK or does it taste like crap? Seems like it would be horrible. __________________ Get Paid Per Email Like The WEGCASH Days!!!!

08-30-2012, 08:38 PM	#23
martinsc Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: 127.0.0.1 Posts: 27,047	__________________ Make Money

08-30-2012, 09:08 PM	#25
Brad Mitchell Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Southfield, MI Posts: 9,812	This I have to try. Thanks for sharing... I'll report back someday when I do it! Brad __________________ President at MojoHost \| brad at mojohost dot com \| Skype MojoHostBrad 71 industry awards for hosting and professional excellence since 1999

08-30-2012, 09:54 PM	#27
2012 So Fucking What Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 17,189	i'll have to remember this the next time I'm in prison, thanks __________________ best host: Webair \| best sponsor: Kink \| best coder: 688218966 \| Go Fuck Yourself

08-31-2012, 02:30 AM	#29
Bill8 Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 1,901	when i was growing up pn the farm we kids - teens - made hard cider every fall and most of the way thru the winter. Temperature was the key - as well as light - you just put the plastic jugs in the root cellar, and depending on how long you waited you got a drink that varied from lightly alcoholic to brutal. Because it was wild yeasts it sometimes went bad but you could smell the difference. We did the same with concord grape juice and even made alcoholic root beer. Cider was the best and easiest. Had to be a bit sneaky about it so the parents didn't find out. Halloween was fun - perfect temps to do it, lots of cider available. Last edited by Bill8; 08-31-2012 at 02:32 AM..

08-31-2012, 03:41 AM	#30
ottopottomouse She is ugly, bad luck. Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 13,177	sauce Might as well just put vodka in the juice. __________________ ↑ see post ↑ 13101

08-31-2012, 08:23 AM	#33
Tom_PM Porn Meister Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 16,443	Definitely like an "inmate brew". Except I think you normally would use a condom with a tiny pin prick hole to let the CO2 out. You just have to be sure the juice has REAL sugar or the yeast won't eat it. No fake sweeteners. __________________ 43-922-863 Shut up and play your guitar.

08-31-2012, 08:26 AM	#34
pornguy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Homeless Posts: 62,911	Wish they sold that here. __________________ PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online! TChicks.com \| Angeles Cid \| Mariana Cordoba \| MAILERS WELCOME!

08-31-2012, 10:49 AM	#43
teennutsuckers My Sig was too Big! :( Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2012 Posts: 216	pure ignorance it's just a wine kit where does racism come in