Are you arrogant or humble?

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  • LAJ
    Gingerific
    • Jun 2001
    • 5567

    #1

    Are you arrogant or humble?

    Obviously there are many points on the spectrum... most of us fall somewhere between.

    This is definitely a must read for many...

    Are You Arrogant or Humble? Guarding Yourself from Yourself

    by Connor Young

    YNOT ? The online adult entertainment industry has travelled a long path since its rise to prominence in the late 20th Century. We are not today the industry we were just one decade ago. I will leave to others to argue whether the changes have been a positive evolution for a popular industry, or a steady descent into the deepest caverns of business hell. There are valid arguments for many different views here.

    MORE: http://www.ynot.com/content/117649-a...-guarding.html
    YNOT.com - The original industry resource
    email jay at ynot dot com or skype LAJConsulting
  • CyberHustler
    Masterbaiter
    • Feb 2006
    • 28750

    #2
    My personality has been described as "humble arrogance"
    “If you can convince the lowest white man he’s better than the best colored man, he won’t notice you’re picking his pocket. Hell, give him somebody to look down on, and he’ll empty his pockets for you.”

    Comment

    • CaptainHowdy
      Too lazy to set a custom title
      • Dec 2004
      • 94741

      #3
      I'm ... virtuous.

      Comment

      • LAJ
        Gingerific
        • Jun 2001
        • 5567

        #4
        Originally posted by CyberHustler
        My personality has been described as "humble arrogance"
        DAMN... who's the girl in your sig?
        YNOT.com - The original industry resource
        email jay at ynot dot com or skype LAJConsulting

        Comment

        • NaughtyRob
          Two fresh affiliate progs
          • Nov 2004
          • 29602

          #5
          Humbly erotic.
          [email protected]
          Skype: 17026955414
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          • TrustCash
            Confirmed User
            • Jul 2011
            • 344

            #6
            I've a sublime personality.

            Comment

            • Tom_PM
              Porn Meister
              • Feb 2005
              • 16443

              #7
              Aletta Ocean it looks like in the sig.

              I call myself arrogant, but thats just to cover for being kind of a standoffish type. I'm actually humble.
              43-922-863 Shut up and play your guitar.

              Comment

              • LAJ
                Gingerific
                • Jun 2001
                • 5567

                #8
                Thanks for responding, guys. Hopefully you are reading the article too
                YNOT.com - The original industry resource
                email jay at ynot dot com or skype LAJConsulting

                Comment

                • QuantumDesigns
                  Confirmed User
                  • Feb 2012
                  • 49

                  #9
                  Really good article. Watch that fake narrative.
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                  • iwantchixx
                    Too lazy to set a custom title
                    • Oct 2002
                    • 12860

                    #10
                    I'm an asshole with a good heart. That's the best I can describe lol.

                    Comment

                    • Evil Chris
                      OG
                      • Dec 2001
                      • 13249

                      #11
                      that was a good read


                      It PAYZE to post on GFY

                      chris at payze.com | Skype chriswrp

                      Comment

                      • MaDalton
                        I am Amazing Content!
                        • Feb 2004
                        • 39861

                        #12
                        i own GFY
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                        • MaDalton
                          I am Amazing Content!
                          • Feb 2004
                          • 39861

                          #13
                          am i doing it right?

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                          • epitome
                            So Fucking Lame
                            • Jun 2009
                            • 12156

                            #14
                            I am a sociopath. Where does that put me?

                            Comment

                            • Tom_PM
                              Porn Meister
                              • Feb 2005
                              • 16443

                              #15
                              Originally posted by epitome
                              I am a sociopath. Where does that put me?
                              You rub peoples faces in your humble. Or something.
                              43-922-863 Shut up and play your guitar.

                              Comment

                              • spazlabz
                                Confirmed User
                                • Jul 2003
                                • 6548

                                #16
                                Conner did a great job on that article, I actually enjoyed reading it

                                Comment

                                • CyberHustler
                                  Masterbaiter
                                  • Feb 2006
                                  • 28750

                                  #17
                                  Originally posted by epitome
                                  I am a sociopath. Where does that put me?
                                  That makes you pretty much "normal humble"
                                  “If you can convince the lowest white man he’s better than the best colored man, he won’t notice you’re picking his pocket. Hell, give him somebody to look down on, and he’ll empty his pockets for you.”

                                  Comment

                                  • Captain Kawaii
                                    So Fucking Banned
                                    • Oct 2007
                                    • 6748

                                    #18
                                    Originally posted by epitome
                                    I am a sociopath. Where does that put me?
                                    With the "in-crowd" hehe

                                    Great article, thanks for sharing.

                                    Comment

                                    • JFK
                                      FUBAR the ORIGINATOR
                                      • Jan 2002
                                      • 67373

                                      #19
                                      OH Lord, it's hard to be humble, when you're perfect in every way

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                                      • Cyndalie
                                        Confirmed User
                                        • Jan 2002
                                        • 3615

                                        #20
                                        Much more humble than the days of old.
                                        Cyndalie
                                        Marketing Director
                                        StoriesTraffic.com

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                                        • AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                                          Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
                                          • Jul 2004
                                          • 38323

                                          #21


                                          I'm the most humble arrogant prick that you are likely to ever meet...

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                                          • ottopottomouse
                                            She is ugly, bad luck.
                                            • Jan 2010
                                            • 13177

                                            #22
                                            neither.
                                            ↑ see post ↑
                                            13101

                                            Comment

                                            • Best-In-BC
                                              Confirmed User
                                              • Jun 2002
                                              • 9511

                                              #23
                                              Originally posted by CyberHustler
                                              My personality has been described as "humble arrogance"
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                                              • ArsewithClass
                                                So Fucking Banned
                                                • Mar 2007
                                                • 7957

                                                #24
                                                I'm pretty humble with a slight cocky attitude giving motivation to work, love & life. It can bring out either charisma & charm but can easily turn into arrogance depending on the spirit of the people around me.

                                                Comment

                                                • Phoenix
                                                  BACON BACON BACON
                                                  • Nov 2002
                                                  • 35475

                                                  #25
                                                  fuck yo couch!!
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                                                  • L-Pink
                                                    working on my tan
                                                    • Mar 2005
                                                    • 39151

                                                    #26
                                                    Originally posted by iwantchixx
                                                    I'm an asshole with a good heart. That's the best I can describe lol.
                                                    I can't vouch for the good heart part.

                                                    .

                                                    Comment

                                                    • Theo
                                                      HAL 9000
                                                      • May 2001
                                                      • 34515

                                                      #27
                                                      Good article. The majority of truly successfully people I know are more humble than you would expect them to be. It's not that rare where media creates a different image. Regarding our industry, I don't feel there's a big difference at this point than in the rest of the world. Most of big egos in our industry vanished or settled.

                                                      Comment

                                                      • epitome
                                                        So Fucking Lame
                                                        • Jun 2009
                                                        • 12156

                                                        #28
                                                        Originally posted by AVN Theo
                                                        Good article. The majority of truly successfully people I know are more humble than you would expect them to be. It's not that rare where media creates a different image. Regarding our industry, I don't feel there's a big difference at this point than in the rest of the world. Most of big egos in our industry vanished or settled.
                                                        Go to Nordstrom and ask the personal shoppers about some of the "successful" people they deal with. There are some ugly stories.

                                                        The few extremely wealthy people I know are cool and down to earth, but similar personalities were the mutual attraction. There is no shortage of arrogant pricks though.

                                                        What I hate more than arrogance is misplaced arrogance. Like the South Florida boys who drive $100k sports cars but live in a $800 a month apartment. They spend their whole paycheck on their image.

                                                        Comment

                                                        • chaze
                                                          Confirmed User
                                                          • Aug 2002
                                                          • 9774

                                                          #29
                                                          Confident but not arrogant.

                                                          Humble but still faithful.
                                                          Like the desert needs the rain
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                                                          • the Shemp
                                                            congrats to the winners
                                                            • Nov 2001
                                                            • 10891

                                                            #30
                                                            i'm too old to change ...
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                                                            • L-Pink
                                                              working on my tan
                                                              • Mar 2005
                                                              • 39151

                                                              #31
                                                              I'm very humble with a sarcastic sense of humor that's often misunderstood.

                                                              Comment

                                                              • CurrentlySober
                                                                Too lazy to wipe my ass
                                                                • Aug 2002
                                                                • 38950

                                                                #32
                                                                neither - just drunk...


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                                                                • MaDalton
                                                                  I am Amazing Content!
                                                                  • Feb 2004
                                                                  • 39861

                                                                  #33
                                                                  Originally posted by L-Pink
                                                                  I'm very humble with a sarcastic sense of humor that's often misunderstood.
                                                                  oh, i know how that feels
                                                                  AmazingContent.com - providing only the best content and service since 2003
                                                                  Monetize your content on Veegaz.com - one of Germanies largest VOD sites
                                                                  Got German traffic? We convert it into money for you!
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                                                                  • epitome
                                                                    So Fucking Lame
                                                                    • Jun 2009
                                                                    • 12156

                                                                    #34
                                                                    I still can't get the article to load. Crashes chrome.

                                                                    Comment

                                                                    • Barefootsies
                                                                      Choice is an Illusion
                                                                      • Feb 2005
                                                                      • 42635

                                                                      #35
                                                                      Originally posted by LAJ
                                                                      Are you arrogant or humble?
                                                                      It really comes down to the perception of those around you. Regardless of your intention.

                                                                      There are people who actually know me on a personal level who will tell you I am humble, and frankly do not care about money. It's little more than a means to an end. There are haters on GFY from my fan club who think I base my entire life (or define it) on the money i make, and am maliciously arrogant to a fault. Yet I am the same person.

                                                                      In the end, the perception of those around you are how THEY define you. It really does not matter what your 'intentions' are. Their perceived reality is what they go off of, and how they define their relationship with you. If they do not like you, everything you do has some ulterior sinister motive.

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                                                                      • LAJ
                                                                        Gingerific
                                                                        • Jun 2001
                                                                        • 5567

                                                                        #36
                                                                        To the click challenged... here is the full article in all its glory...

                                                                        By Connor Young

                                                                        YNOT – The online adult entertainment industry has travelled a long path since its rise to prominence in the late 20th Century. We are not today the industry we were just one decade ago. I will leave to others to argue whether the changes have been a positive evolution for a popular industry, or a steady descent into the deepest caverns of business hell. There are valid arguments for many different views here.

                                                                        One thing remains constant, though: This industry, for whatever reason, has a real problem with hubris.

                                                                        The ancient Greeks gave great thought to the crime of hubris. The term can refer to a number of behaviors, including one taking an interest in the humiliation of others. Need examples? See your local Internet chat board. Often when we speak of hubris today, we mean a kind of dangerous arrogance that can lead even otherwise good people to tragic consequences. This brand of hubris can blind you to the problems that you create for yourself through the statements you make, the narratives you present and the actions you pursue.

                                                                        It may just be part of the industry culture, but it’s worth considering: Many personalities on the message boards and industry networking channels feel compelled to present themselves as “bigger” than they really are — and by “bigger,” I mean more powerful, more financially well off and more politically connected. In fact, few individuals working in the adult space can really make these claims with any veracity. So that means most of the boasters are simply liars, believing they will profit from a false narrative, either through financial gains or through social gains. Sometimes it works ... for a while. But usually, even the most clever individuals who pursue this approach with tenacity suffer from excessive arrogance and fatal hubris, and eventually they wind up digging their own graves.

                                                                        We all fight with hubris from time to time. Few of us are fully immune. Allow hubris to take too much control over your choices, however, and you’ll eventually back yourself into a corner. This can happen simply because you’re accustomed to outsmarting or outwitting people for too long a time. The more you spin false narratives that others believe, the more you start to think of yourself as too clever to catch. The more you succeed in lies, the more you start to think of everyone else as too dimwitted or too naïve ever to see the truth. This is when you’re at extreme risk of exposing yourself as a liar and manipulator. You can destroy your name and reputation in a matter of hours when you are blinded by your own arrogance born of past successes.

                                                                        Hubris isn’t just a problem in the adult industry, of course, and sometimes it helps to consider problems from a distance.

                                                                        I remember shaking my head in disgust as Frank and Jamie McCourt took over the Los Angeles Dodgers baseball team a few years back. To me, their love of media spin and manipulation showed a fundamental lack of respect for the fans. But their marketing narratives seemed to be fully justified in the first few years of their ownership, as their reputation in Los Angeles seemed untarnished by their actions, and the rich and powerful from Southern California seemed eager to call them friends.

                                                                        But arrogance eventually caught up with the McCourts, and fans turned against them when they started to feel duped. The normal PR spin wasn’t working to bring back lost revenue, and ticket sales plunged. Eventually, Major League Baseball worked to secure their promised exit from the sport. It can be argued today that Frank McCourt is the most hated individual in Los Angeles Dodgers history.

                                                                        Had I warned Frank McCourt about hubris before his eventual downfall, I’m guessing he would have pointed to all the success he had achieved early on with his chosen approach to business. And at that time, it would have been really hard to argue against the results. Today the cost is clear as he prepares for his departure from the owner’s seat.

                                                                        So what’s my point? Just to offer some friendly advice to webmasters, affiliates, sales reps, talent, and anyone else who takes to the public forums of the Internet on a regular basis. Work to keep yourself in check. Shy away from letting false narratives take over your public image. Remember that for the vast majority of you, you’re not a huge player or financial powerhouse, even if you’ve done reasonably well in adult.

                                                                        Humility may not be fashionable, but it’s an important quality for long-term success.





                                                                        Connor Young is the president of Houston, Texas-based YNOT Group LLC.
                                                                        YNOT.com - The original industry resource
                                                                        email jay at ynot dot com or skype LAJConsulting

                                                                        Comment

                                                                        • AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                                                                          Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
                                                                          • Jul 2004
                                                                          • 38323

                                                                          #37
                                                                          Today's word is Hubris...repeat after me, Hubris:









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                                                                          • globofun
                                                                            Buk Lau
                                                                            • Aug 2005
                                                                            • 2651

                                                                            #38
                                                                            Originally posted by Jesus H Christ
                                                                            When I interact with people/business I am simply a mirror of you.



                                                                            As for myself, I'm humble like.................12clicks!
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                                                                            • TheAmericanCannibal
                                                                              Confirmed User
                                                                              • Dec 2006
                                                                              • 3087

                                                                              #39
                                                                              Humble?


                                                                              hahahaha

                                                                              Comment

                                                                              • uno
                                                                                RIP Dodger. BEST.CAT.EVER
                                                                                • Dec 2002
                                                                                • 18450

                                                                                #40
                                                                                There was a commercial a while ago where one thing said to the other that they have an ego and it replied "i don't have an ego, I just love how awesome I am."

                                                                                A few weeks ago my cousin called me an elitist and I said "i'm not an elitest, I'm just better than most people."
                                                                                -uno
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                                                                                • uno
                                                                                  RIP Dodger. BEST.CAT.EVER
                                                                                  • Dec 2002
                                                                                  • 18450

                                                                                  #41
                                                                                  Originally posted by TheAmericanCannibal
                                                                                  Humble?


                                                                                  hahahaha


                                                                                  You did manage to go one post without namedropping. That has to count as some sort of progress.
                                                                                  -uno
                                                                                  icq: 111-914
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                                                                                  • SmutHammer
                                                                                    Confirmed User
                                                                                    • Mar 2008
                                                                                    • 4301

                                                                                    #42
                                                                                    Originally posted by CurrentlySober
                                                                                    neither - just drunk...

                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                    • V_RocKs
                                                                                      Damn Right I Kiss Ass!
                                                                                      • Nov 2003
                                                                                      • 32449

                                                                                      #43
                                                                                      both depending on my level of intoxication and the IQ of my drinking partners...

                                                                                      Comment

                                                                                      • gimme-website
                                                                                        Confirmed User
                                                                                        • Jun 2008
                                                                                        • 1589

                                                                                        #44
                                                                                        Great article. We could all learn something from that.
                                                                                        <<<points to self
                                                                                        www.gimme-website.com

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                                                                                        • Paul Markham
                                                                                          Too old to care
                                                                                          • Jun 2001
                                                                                          • 52942

                                                                                          #45
                                                                                          Depends on the context and situation. On some things I know about I'm arrogant if talking to the clueless, on others humble. Especially if in the company of my betters.

                                                                                          Which is why I come across as arrogant here.



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                                                                                          • 12clicks
                                                                                            Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                            • Jan 2001
                                                                                            • 19813

                                                                                            #46
                                                                                            It's a good article for affiliates to take to heart.
                                                                                            I'm not a dinosaur, I'm a crocodile. I've seen dinosaurs come and go and I'm left unimpressed.

                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                            • raymor
                                                                                              Confirmed User
                                                                                              • Oct 2002
                                                                                              • 3745

                                                                                              #47
                                                                                              I'm wearing a shirt that says "To save time, let's just assume I'm never wrong."

                                                                                              On the other hand, last night I kept my mouth shut for the entire board meeting because I was in the presence of people more knowledgeable and experienced than I. When I know, I know. When others know better than I, I recognize that and STFU. Where does that put me?
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                                                                                              • Mike Dutch
                                                                                                Confirmed User
                                                                                                • Aug 2003
                                                                                                • 5607

                                                                                                #48
                                                                                                Originally posted by LAJ
                                                                                                DAMN... who's the girl in your sig?
                                                                                                Looks like Oletta Ocean

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                                                                                                • L-Pink
                                                                                                  working on my tan
                                                                                                  • Mar 2005
                                                                                                  • 39151

                                                                                                  #49
                                                                                                  Originally posted by raymor

                                                                                                  On the other hand, last night I kept my mouth shut for the entire board meeting because I was in the presence of people more knowledgeable and experienced than I. When I know, I know. When others know better than I, I recognize that and STFU. Where does that put me?
                                                                                                  Since you never learn anything while talking I think that makes you intelligent.

                                                                                                  .

                                                                                                  Comment

                                                                                                  • Jacob[Soft]
                                                                                                    Confirmed User
                                                                                                    • Mar 2010
                                                                                                    • 873

                                                                                                    #50
                                                                                                    Originally posted by L-Pink
                                                                                                    Since you never learn anything while talking I think that makes you intelligent.

                                                                                                    .

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