Ricky Gervais One Liners - Golden Globes

[Lester Burnham]

So can't find a nice compilation of Ricky Gervais' one-liners at the golden globes. I saw about 1 minute of the monologue, and he was just tearing apart the establishment. Can some folks list out some of his funnier one-liners? I liked the one he used to start the awards show:

"It's going to be a night of partying and heavy drinking, or as Charlie Sheen calls it ? 'breakfast'"

[DamianJ]

"Americans think I am really funny, British people think I am a fat wanker"

"I was funny once, in The Office, but I was playing myself. A fat, annoying cock. Americans haven't realised this yet!"

"Hellllo America! The people that still think I am funny"

HTH.

Damian

[maxxtro]

[DamianJ]

After watching 2 minutes of that, I see I was right in my earlier post.

[maxxtro]

[ottopottomouse]

"Americans think I am really funny, British people think I am a fat wanker"

"I was funny once, in The Office, but I was playing myself. A fat, annoying cock. Americans haven't realised this yet!"

"Hellllo America! The people that still think I am funny"

HTH.

Damian

Spot on.

[DVTimes]

i think he is great.

[CaptainHowdy]

I don't get it...

[DVTimes]

[DamianJ]

i think he is great.

you also use comic sans

I rest my case.

[DVTimes]

[DVTimes]

you have to remeber Ricky Gervais hates actors.

thats why he made extras.

he will have thought most of them pointless twits.

but he is clever.

to be honest i do not expect damian or americans to understand his jokes as its aimed at the clever.

[VikingMan]

Not funny at all, and I love British humor.

[DamianJ]

Not funny at all, and I love British humor.

The only people in England who like him are dribbling bicurious spastics who have membershit (sic) websites *cough vanbabes.com cough* with 3 pictures sets and NO VIDEO AT ALL in them.

[adult-help]

extras with patrick stewart is brilliant though...

[stephane76]

he was awesome in "extras"
LMAO

[Verbal]

"I'd like to thank God for making me an athiest."

[BlackCrayon]

The only people in England who like him are dribbling bicurious spastics who have membershit (sic) websites *cough vanbabes.com cough* with 3 pictures sets and NO VIDEO AT ALL in them.

you were probably all over him until he got popular and it wasn't 'cool' anymore to look him.

[Bryan G]

Sorry Damian have to disagree with you here. I really think he's great LOL.

[2intense]

Not funny at all, and I love British humor.

[maxxtro]

extras with patrick stewart is brilliant though...

Haha, yeah. Love this scene with him:

[Evil Chris]

I like Ricky Gervais but nowhere near as much as I used to.

In his first stand-up (Out of England), he made fun of the obese, down syndrome, autism, etc... Cheap shot comedy. Based on his awesome work with The Office and Extras, I really expected more from him.

[DamianJ]

Sorry Damian have to disagree with you here. I really think he's great LOL.

What really? You think this badly scripted autocue reading is good?

Shit. You are fucked in the head dude.

[Evil Chris]

What really? You think this badly scripted autocue reading is good?

Shit. You are fucked in the head dude.

Damian I agree with you. Ricky has become weak over the past few years.

He's much better when paired with Stephen Merchant.

[Evil Chris]

One of the best scenes ever.

[stephane76]

Damian I agree with you. Ricky has become weak over the past few years.

He's much better when paired with Stephen Merchant.

my British Twin

[Bryan G]

What really? You think this badly scripted autocue reading is good?

Shit. You are fucked in the head dude.

Well I did not watch the Golden Globes this year he was great the previous year. I also that he was excellent in the office.

[dyna mo]

he was not funny at all last nite.

[Caligari]

Haha, yeah. Love this scene with him:

good one! first time i've seen stewart do something funny and he's great.

[DVTimes]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-12205469

"I think I'll go just close enough to the edge but not go over it," he said on the red carpet before the ceremony.

But by the end of the star-studded bash, many were left debating whether he had gone too far in his jibes at the gathered celebrities and even organisers the Hollywood Foreign Press Association (HFPA).

He opened the show in no-nonsense style saying: "It's going to be a night of partying and heavy drinking - or as Charlie Sheen calls it, breakfast."

After a barrage of jokes, the rumour mill then went into overdrive after Gervais apparently disappeared for nearly an hour during the live ceremony.

When he eventually returned, he appeared to be less offensive, prompting a number of people to question what had happened to him.

Had he been fired? Been given a telling off? Ordered to tone it down?

Continue reading the main story
“
Start Quote
Aside from the fact that it's been hugely mean-spirited, with mildly sinister undertones, I'd say the vibe of the show is pretty good so far, wouldn't you?”
End Quote
Robert Downey Jr
Former newspaper editor and Britain's Got Talent judge Piers Morgan tweeted: "1st question when Gervais appears on @pierstonight on Thurs - what the hell did they do to you backstage for an hour? He looks haunted."

Here's a selection of his more controversial jokes:

"It was a big year for 3D movies. Toy Story, Despicable Me, Tron. It seems like everything this year was three-dimensional, except the characters in The Tourist. I already feel bad about that joke. I'm jumping on the bandwagon, because I haven't even seen The Tourist. Who has?
I'd like to quash the rumours that the only reason The Tourist was nominated was so that the Hollywood Foreign Press can hang out with Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie. That is rubbish, that is not the only reason - they also accepted bribes.
"I Love You Phillip Morris stars Jim Carey and Ewan McGregor - two heterosexual actors pretending to be gay. So, the complete opposite of some famous scientologists. Probably. My lawyers helped me with the wording of that joke."
"I was sure the Golden Globe for special effects would go to the team that airbrushed [the Sex and the City 2] poster. Girls, we know how old you are. I saw one of you in an episode of Bonanza."
On Jennifer Lopez - "She's just Jenny from the block. If the block in question is that one on Rodeo Drive between Cartier and Prada."
On multi-millionaire Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg: "Heather Mills calls him the one that got away."
While introducing Robert Downey Jr - "Many of you in this room probably know him best from such facilities as the Betty Ford Clinic and Los Angeles County Jail."
When he took to the stage, Downey Jr quipped in return: "Aside from the fact that it's been hugely mean-spirited, with mildly sinister undertones, I'd say the vibe of the show is pretty good so far, wouldn't you?"

He later said backstage: 'I think it's great to be funny, but it's better if you can do it without hurting people."

Other celebrities also expressed their opinions on Gervais's hosting skills - Oscar winner Tom Hanks said while presenting an award: "We recall when Ricky Gervais was a slightly chubby but very kind comedian," to which his Toy Story 3 co-star Tim Allen quickly added: "Neither of which he is now."

And after suggesting he had to help HFPA president Philip Berk "off the toilet and pop his teeth back in", Berk fired back at Gervais: "The next time you want someone to qualify your movies, go to another guy."


Tom Hanks and Tim Allen expressed their dismay at Gervais's hosting skills Hollywood film producer Harvey Weinstein joked that Gervais would "not make it out of town" that night.

"There are seven people that we've hired to kill him and deservedly so. Knowing that Ricky Gervais will never work again means a lot to me, I'm going to make sure of it," he told journalists backstage.

But some attendees endorsed the comic's jokes. 30 Rock star Alec Baldwin was spotted wiping tears from his eyes throughout the ceremony, and lifetime achievement winner Robert De Niro was also seen laughing all the way through.

While The Social Network and best supporting actor nominee Andrew Garfield told the Los Angeles Times: "He's been terribly nasty and horribly rude and I think he's genius."

US critics were not kind in their review of Gervais's "performance".

The Los Angeles Times said his jokes set "a corrosive tone" for the night, while TV critic Mary McNamara said: "The opposite of dull and deferential is not snotty and abusive."

"It would not have been surprising to see a hook emerge suddenly stage left or to learn that the host had taken 'suddenly ill'," she added.

The New York Times said the comic was "merciless from the start" while the Hollywood Reporter said it would "undoubtedly be his last hosting gig for the Hollywood Foreign Press Association (and, who knows, maybe any Stateside awards)".

However Entertainment Weekly's Ken Tucker had nothing but praise for him: "Thanks once again to Ricky Gervais for bringing the sort of funny rudeness and effrontery... that make an awards show such as the Golden Globes engaging to watch."

The King's Speech director Tom Hooper perhaps summed up the general feeling after the ceremony: "I thought he was hilarious but will he ever present another award show again? I don't know but if he went out, he went out burning."

[Agent 488]

not funny at all. blah.

[DVTimes]

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[PR_Glen]

Gervais is normally mildly funny, the office stuff is him at his best. i still prefer the american version though.

think about the alternatives.. could you imagine 4 hours of dane cook making stupid noises into the microphone for that length of time? someone would kill him...

[DVTimes]

[docputer]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-12205469


On multi-millionaire Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg: "Heather Mills calls him the one that got away."
"

That was probably my favorite line.

[Bryan G]

He was in an 80's Pop Band as well LOL

http://www.seonadancing.com/

[_Richard_]

have to admire a guy who trolls hollywood. truth hurts

[Mutt]

Tom Hanks has turned into such a goody two shoes old fuddy duddy. ever seen a celebrity roast? what's the difference.

if people who are rich and famous can't take little jokes about themselves they can go fuck themselves - babies.

[DVTimes]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-12206235

Golden Globes host Ricky Gervais has spoken about his disappearance from stage during the US awards ceremony.

The British comedian left the podium for nearly an hour, prompting viewers to question if he was being reprimanded for his jokes about the stars.

But in a statement, Gervais said: "I did every single introduction I was meant to. There just happened to be a long gap".

"The atmosphere backstage and at the after show was great," he added.

Gervais, hosting the gala for the second year in succession, opened the show in strident style saying: "It's going to be a night of partying and heavy drinking - or as Charlie Sheen calls it, breakfast."

He went on to poke fun at the likes of Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie and introduced Robert Downey Jr, saying "Many of you in this room probably know him best from such facilities as the Betty Ford Clinic and Los Angeles County Jail."

'Best jokes'

It prompted Downey Jr to quip: "Aside from the fact that it's been hugely mean-spirited, with mildly sinister undertones, I'd say the vibe of the show is pretty good so far, wouldn't you?"

Oscar winner Tom Hanks said: "We recall when Ricky Gervais was a slightly chubby but very kind comedian," to which his Toy Story 3 co-star Tim Allen added: "Neither of which he is now."

In the latter part of the show, having been off stage for a lengthy period of time, a more subdued Gervais appeared, prompting speculation he had been told to tone down his act.

But Gervais insisted: "I was allowed to choose who I would introduce in advance. I obviously chose presenters who I had the best jokes for, and who I knew had a good sense of humour.

"Everyone took it well and the atmosphere backstage and at the after show was great."

US critics appeared divided, with The Los Angeles Times saying his jokes set "a corrosive tone" for the night.

But Entertainment Weekly praising "the sort of funny rudeness and effrontery... that make an awards show such as the Golden Globes engaging to watch."

Sccording to overnight viewing figures, the ceremony was seen by almost 17 million people in the US, up on last year's audience.

[Scott McD]

Not really a fan at all.

Some of his stuff is "ok", but there's just something about him which will always make me think he is just a cunt...

[Mutt]

Tom Hanks has turned into such a goody two shoes old fuddy duddy. ever seen a celebrity roast? what's the difference.

if people who are rich and famous can't take little jokes about themselves they can go fuck themselves - babies.

i just watched - i was wrong about Tom Hanks, it read differently than if you see and hear the line delivered, he took it in good humor with a good comeback.

[The Porn Nerd]

Ever see the Ricky Gervais Show on HBO? He and two friends go in a room once a week, no script, sit around a table and blather on - I mean, are "funny" - and just ramble on for an hour. Then they give this "conversation" to some cheap-ass animaters. WHAM! More Ricky Gervais product to sell! And for what? An hour bullshitting with friends?

One the one hand, he's clever. On the other, he's a bit of self-absorbed wanker. (Just like every other actor/comedian)

[ShellyCrash]

I like Ricky Gervais but nowhere near as much as I used to.

In his first stand-up (Out of England), he made fun of the obese, down syndrome, autism, etc... Cheap shot comedy. Based on his awesome work with The Office and Extras, I really expected more from him.

I'm glad I'm not the only one. His standup was horrid. Like a cheap immitation of an Eddie Izzard routine minus the wit. I think Gervais devoted the first 45 minutes plus to putting down fat people, a group of which he as been an obvious member of until relatively recently.

One thing I liked about Gervais and his work in extras was that he seemed anti american asthetics / superficiality and the big hollywood machine. Look at him now:



Good job comitting career suicide. Now people on both sides of the pond think he's an unfunny asshole.

[DVTimes]

he is great.

the thing is he does not care.

he just goes for it.

[_Richard_]

in other news, ratings for the golden globes have gone up for the second straight year, in comparison to its usual 'static' ratings