Why are guys afraid of commitment?

Why are women afraid of spiders?

We're not afraid of commitment...we're just afraid of commiting to the wrong girl.

Is it a big secret? lol if you find a girl that is everything you want, then why not go for it?

I am not.








Wrong.

We are not afraid of commitment. We are just afraid of the women locking up the box after some time and waiving the key infront of our faces. When a woman looses her man , she could of prevented it in most cases.

Define "commitment"

Here, this should explain it:

Men love their freedom. For many guys, the very thought of making a commitment to one woman for the rest of their lives is enough to send them sprinting for the hills. The dreaded "C-word" implies compromise, loss of independence, the sacrifice of sexual variety, and the looming specter of financial devastation.
And the statistics bear this out -- the U.S. Census reports that, over the past four decades, the rate of marriage has definitely been on the decrease.

According to the National Marriage Project, a study undertaken at Rutgers University, men today are overwhelmingly apprehensive about getting married. Cohabitation -- commitment with an escape hatch -- is on the rise. So what is the explanation for this phenomenon? Just why are men so afraid of commitment these days?

Here are a few of the reasons:

No more freedom
We men are extremely independent by nature. We like to make our own decisions and run our lives by our own rules. We want to do what we want when we want. But when a woman enters the picture, all the choices a guy simply used to take for granted -- going out for a beer with his buddies, buying a big screen TV, playing golf on Saturday afternoon -- suddenly have to be cleared with her first. And her answer is almost always, "No -- we're a couple now" (translation: "We're going to do things my way"). Almost overnight, we find ourselves trapped, doing what she wants to do, regardless of his own wants or desires.

Loss of space
We like guy things -- we need "guy space" for stuff like cars, tools and watching kick-ass action flicks. But women want to take over, to "female up" what used to be exclusive male territory with frilly drapes and paintings of flowers. In fact, they're so committed to feminizing all the space around them that they quickly start forbidding us to have any guy stuff at all. So suddenly you find the bathroom buried in female products, your leather couch has been reupholstered in pastel paisley, and the spot where you kept your tools has blossomed into an indoor herb garden.

One sex partner, forever
We naturally crave sexual variety. When we commit -- either in marriage or cohabitation -- we willingly volunteer to cut ourselves off from any other sexual pursuits. Sexual boredom can set in, followed by a total lack of desire. For a lot of us -- even guys who weren't getting a lot of action anyway -- this can be the scariest consequence of all.

We've been burned, she's a closet nag, she wants it all, and wait, it gets even worse...

We've been burned before
When we've been divorced and run through the wringer of the female-biased court system, many of us are reluctant (read "terrified") to risk a second commitment. Nowadays, we aren't exactly chomping at the bit to sign a contract legally allowing a woman to clean us out financially. Successful achievers -- those of us who have built companies and high-powered careers from the ground up -- are especially afraid of being forced to hand over all the fruits of our hard labor to a greedy female and may make the decision never to get involved in a serious relationship again.

The emotional baggage
Many women look at marriage through Cinderella eyes -- for them, putting a ring on their fingers means that we will magically solve all their problems, from childhood issues with their fathers to huge shopping debts incurred on credit cards. Women often submerge their true personalities and agendas until the knot is tied -- but when the truth comes out and the we find ourselves legally bound to a greedy, nagging bitch, it's too late.

Lack of compromise
Commitment implies the ability to compromise -- ideally a marriage should be a 50/50 partnership in which each half contributes and shares equally. But to a woman, "compromise" often means "do it my way or you're cut off from sex." So we are forced into surrendering to this sexual blackmail if we want to get any sex at all, and the result is a terrible loss of male power.

Loss of free time
Serious relationships suck up an enormous amount of time and energy -- they can entirely take over our lives. The pressure is always on to do something, be it wine and dine her, interact with her family, remember her birthday, or pick her up from work. For some of us, all the bother just isn't worth the effort.

Not ready for it
These days, there are fewer societal pressures to marry and we can weigh our options instead of just jumping directly from school into marriage. We can afford to wait for that perfect woman while we concentrate on getting our careers off the ground, save to buy a house, or actively play the field.

Can't trust a woman
We learn pretty fast that many women can't be trusted -- they're always looking to upgrade, to latch onto a man with more money, more status and more stuff to sex-ploit. Commitment to a relationship means putting your heart on the line, and none of us want a sharp stiletto heel spiking us in the back as our ex-girlfriend scrambles over us to get to the next guy.

She applies pressure
For a lot of women, commitment is the finish line for their adult lives. They want to get married and they want to do so now. So they exert increasing pressure on us to settle down -- pressure that can cause us to pack up and leave.

is she commitment worthy?

Committing to a woman is serious business -- it's a decision that shouldn't be taken lightly. Too many men get married for the wrong reasons: they're getting older; all their friends are walking down the aisle; the woman is good-looking but lacks other desirable qualities; or they're scared they won't meet anyone else.

But it's normal to feel ambivalent -- even scared out of your mind -- about signing away all your other options for the rest of your life.

Not afraid of commitment..just afraid of waking up to an old hag one day

Someone wrote a book about this, it's very simple: He's just not that much into you..

i think we're just afraid of getting hurt, cause if we commit to a chick, they then have a lot of emotional power over us.

because he either thinks or knows he could do better? I dunno, you have to keep your pimphand strong...lol

AND THE ANSWER IS........




Men are like MONKEY BARS to women.....they let go of one dick when they have their little mitts on the next one...


(think about it but don't hurt yourself)

No offense, but this is all a crock of shit. If a guy falls in love he will do whatever it takes to be with this girl. The other times, see my post above, he's just not that much into the girl. Simple. Women need to start waking up this reality and not blame guys for 'lack of commitment'

Sigh. I overcommit myself is my drawback. Now go and figure that one out.

Why would anyone want to be stuck with one girl? That makes no sence.

I'm not afraid to comit to a few hours of lewd/lacivious behavior with you for my site if that is really you in your sig and this is not your webmaster/boyfriend

Are you speaking for yourself or all men in general? If it's the latter than you are hardly qualified to make that statement unless you've done an indepth study yourself.

We're afraid of committing to the wrong girl. Find the right girl and it should be no problem.
WG

I'm not afraid. Why would I be that?

yeah, this is what I think too....its a BS line to keep you on the shelf, if he was sure, he would do whatever it takes....imo

I agree, I am a girl, and I will never commit at this point in my life. But if the right man comes along I can change my ways. I would commit to someone who is worth it, I guess same goes for guys.

Time is inversely related to tolerance.

Over a period of time, the ability to tolerate a chick's insane psyche grows less and less. Thus, it's only natural to choose a path that keeps the time frame as short as possible.

Commitment sucks ass.

You date, you think you fall in love, next thing you know, it's 2 years later and your wondering what the Hell happened.

I'm turning gay.

we are not all "insane".....

Same reason we're afraid of anthrax. It's just bad for you.

hahaha!! Best post ever!!

Yes. Yes you all are. But the fact of the matter is that so are men. The only way two people are able to stay together for any serious length of time is that they are somehow able to tolerate each other's insanity.

THIS IS THE GOD'S HONEST TRUTH!!!

... Half!

Why Buy when you can Lease

I didn't properly answer this question.

If she is everything I think I want, why not?!

Because she's going to be just like the last one, an insane, heartless bitch.

No, my recent breakup has nothing to do with this.

Okay, maybe a little bit.

well said

umm we aren't afraid of it we just don't want it..

Dont encourage that thinking!! lol

Thats right on the ball

not all guys are afraid of commitment...but those who are afraid of
are those which main reason are they do not want to get stucked in routinary
stuffs & get involved with lots of responsiblities associated once committed.

SHE was, but there is a sweet, smokin hot chick out there for you...

in my relationship, its the other way around. HE wants to get married & have kids, and that makes me wanna break up and move out on my own LOL

why cause you think you can find better, or cause you just arent ready?

I'm ready honey.....I'll commit to you if you take me to the Maxim Super Bowl Party..

I shouldn't have jumped and dismissed your post as readily as I have, there are many great and valid points you bring up. But things are really much more simple, and there have been studies done on what I said, specifically as it relates to the book I mentioned: He's just not that into you http://www.oprah.com/tows/booksseen/...ruccillo.jhtml as well as my own personal experience, friends and other research on top of many people in this thread seem to agree. While the points you bring up are interesting, I bet once the guy falls in love all those things including previous heartache and pain are forgotten and commitment is not an issue any more. This probably works for women also.

Do you think you're gonna stay young forever?

Or they just haven't found the woman that's worth all the trouble..

I agree!

because women are fucked in the head today, they read to many magazines and watch to much oprah, most women need to wake the fuck up but they cant because ever since high school they have been trying to pretend they are something that they obviously are not.

i have met very few girls who actually arent screwd in the head and i keep those ones very close to me.

Ladies, I think we need to remind the men of the BS they put us thru...

Well... for every hot chick, there's a guy putting up with her shit.

Wish I could be optimistic, but you never know.

youre not bitter are you....