ePassporte Account Holders - My Suggestion

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  • Fat Panda
    Porn is Dead. Move along.
    • Aug 2006
    • 13296

    #1

    ePassporte Account Holders - My Suggestion

    Call your local FBI field office and ask to speak with a special agent. Explain to them that a US based company dealing with an offshore Caribbean bank is holding your money hostage and refuses to allow you access to it.
  • Matyko
    PsyHead
    • Aug 2005
    • 8677

    #2
    Originally posted by SAC
    Call your local FBI field office and ask to speak with a special agent. Explain to them that a US based company dealing with an offshore Caribbean bank is holding your money hostage and refuses to allow you access to it.
    You Are Insane,
    If you are not kidding.

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    • J. Falcon
      www.AdultCopywriters.com
      • May 2006
      • 31587

      #3
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      Comment

      • RandyD
        Confirmed User
        • May 2007
        • 283

        #4
        Yeah keep those tips coming - there GOLD!
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        Comment

        • beerptrol
          Confirmed Asshole
          • Feb 2003
          • 12722

          #5
          And expect a call from The IRS

          Comment

          • PornMD
            Mainstream Businessman
            • Jan 2007
            • 9291

            #6
            Originally posted by beerptrol
            And expect a call from The IRS
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            Comment

            • spacedog
              Yes that IS me. Bitch.
              • Nov 2001
              • 14149

              #7
              Yeah, like that will fucking help speed up the resolution.

              While many just want their money, others also want Visa functionality restored and suggestions such as yours just complicate matters.

              Comment

              • HorseShit
                Too lazy to set a custom title
                • Dec 2004
                • 17513

                #8
                http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stockholm_syndrome

                Comment

                • Jdoughs
                  Confirmed User
                  • Mar 2004
                  • 5794

                  #9
                  Originally posted by spacedog
                  Yeah, like that will fucking help speed up the resolution.

                  While many just want their money, others also want Visa functionality restored and suggestions such as yours just complicate matters.
                  If they don't give a fuck, why should you.
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                  • Anal Hobbit
                    So Fucking Banned
                    • Aug 2001
                    • 2308

                    #10
                    Originally posted by SAC
                    Call your local FBI field office and ask to speak with a special agent. Explain to them that a US based company dealing with an offshore Caribbean bank is holding your money hostage and refuses to allow you access to it.

                    Yes.. Tell them that the money we as in industry have been laundering and hiding over there is stuck in a frozen state. get their help.

                    Having Visa involved is not enough. Lets get the Feds probing around in there too!

                    Great Idea folks!! Lets do it! That way we for sure will never see it.
                    Visa obviously didnt like what they saw. You think the Feds will like it?
                    Last edited by Anal Hobbit; 09-09-2010, 04:06 PM.

                    Comment

                    • CYF
                      Coupon Guru
                      • Mar 2009
                      • 10973

                      #11
                      Originally posted by beerptrol
                      And expect a call from The IRS
                      Why? I paid my taxes. Didn't you?
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                      • Fat Panda
                        Porn is Dead. Move along.
                        • Aug 2006
                        • 13296

                        #12
                        Originally posted by beerptrol
                        And expect a call from The IRS
                        All sponsors that pay me via epass send me a 1099, I pay 100% of my taxes owed. No reason to fear the IRS.

                        Comment

                        • Fat Panda
                          Porn is Dead. Move along.
                          • Aug 2006
                          • 13296

                          #13
                          I'm just saying guys, better to file a report concerning stuff like this.

                          Comment

                          • signupdamnit
                            Confirmed User
                            • Aug 2007
                            • 6697

                            #14
                            Originally posted by SAC
                            All sponsors that pay me via epass send me a 1099, I pay 100% of my taxes owed. No reason to fear the IRS.


                            All the people who do not report the correct amounts are likely in varying degrees of trouble about now. I don't take pleasure in saying this but I bet a few reading this will go to prison for tax evasion before all is said and done. Many more will likely just pay some fines and penalties.

                            Even if someone doesn't send you a 1099, you'd be a fool not to report it. If this applies to you get your ass to a tax attorney pronto.

                            You don't like my posts? Put me on ignore or fuck right off. I'll say what I want.

                            Comment

                            • Fat Panda
                              Porn is Dead. Move along.
                              • Aug 2006
                              • 13296

                              #15
                              The agent I talked to was very helpful. Informed me about the options I have and provided me with contact information for some people in the Justice Department.

                              Comment

                              • famous
                                Confirmed User
                                • May 2002
                                • 674

                                #16
                                yep no fear for teh irs here either lol. i get 1099s. but epass i thought was no longer a US company?

                                Comment

                                • CyberDilemma
                                  Registered User
                                  • Apr 2008
                                  • 41

                                  #17
                                  Originally posted by SAC
                                  Call your local FBI field office and ask to speak with a special agent. Explain to them that a US based company dealing with an offshore Caribbean bank is holding your money hostage and refuses to allow you access to it.

                                  Good thinking. All we need is the Justice Department to step in and freeze ePassporte's U.S. assets. Try getting your money back anytime soon if that happens.

                                  Comment

                                  • Fat Panda
                                    Porn is Dead. Move along.
                                    • Aug 2006
                                    • 13296

                                    #18
                                    The faster the assets get frozen the better!

                                    Comment

                                    • mechanicvirus
                                      Confirmed User
                                      • Feb 2005
                                      • 4137

                                      #19
                                      I called the CIA and told them operation mallick was compromised and they said "The bird will be taken out" what does that mean?
                                      Click Username > Choose 'User Settings' > Click 'Account' - Scroll down till you see 'Conversation Detail Options' > 'Edit Post Signature'
                                      ​

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                                      • Fat Panda
                                        Porn is Dead. Move along.
                                        • Aug 2006
                                        • 13296

                                        #20
                                        You guys make jokes all you want. I called my local FBI field office this morning, filed a report and gave them all information I have. Enough of getting fucked over!

                                        Comment

                                        • AFSC
                                          #1 for Content Licensing
                                          • Sep 2006
                                          • 2084

                                          #21
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                                          • lagcam
                                            Confirmed User
                                            • Jul 2007
                                            • 2890

                                            #22
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                                            • brassmonkey
                                              Pay It Forward
                                              • Sep 2005
                                              • 77401

                                              #23
                                              Originally posted by mechanicvirus
                                              I called the CIA and told them operation mallick was compromised and they said "The bird will be taken out" what does that mean?
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                                              • martinsc
                                                Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                • Jun 2005
                                                • 27043

                                                #24
                                                Originally posted by lagcam
                                                I knew somebody who used to get a recurring pimple on his nose, until one day when drunk, he cut off his nose, saying "fuck you pimple!"

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                                                • Shey
                                                  Confirmed User
                                                  • Aug 2005
                                                  • 1654

                                                  #25
                                                  Originally posted by SAC
                                                  The agent I talked to was very helpful. Informed me about the options I have and provided me with contact information for some people in the Justice Department.
                                                  The same Justice Department that froze funds for Webmaster Checks?
                                                  Last edited by Shey; 09-09-2010, 11:16 PM. Reason: wrong quote
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                                                  Comment

                                                  • SallyRand
                                                    So Fucking Banned
                                                    • Jan 2008
                                                    • 3487

                                                    #26
                                                    Originally posted by SAC
                                                    Call your local FBI field office and ask to speak with a special agent. Explain to them that a US based company dealing with an offshore Caribbean bank is holding your money hostage and refuses to allow you access to it.

                                                    Oh, Jesus Christ on a Fucking Raft! Like the FBI is going to help us out as we are considered by both the FBI and the current "Administration" as fucking PORNOGRAPHERS and therefore beyond the Pale!!!!!!!???????????????????????

                                                    WTF planet were you born on? Yeah, get the fucking fibbies in here screwing around and we'll ALL get into buckets of shit for one reason or another. The FBI is OBLIGATED to take reports, just as is your local police agency but that doesn't mean they're going to do anything about it.

                                                    Just what is it that you think the FBI will do?

                                                    Call the current occupant of the White House and tell him to send in the Marines?

                                                    Fuck.

                                                    Shit.

                                                    Simply don't use ePass for ANYTHING in future! There are alternative payment methods and many of you will never, ever; not now, not EVER get your money from ePass if you cannot or will not verify your account info. And witholding those funds from the unverified among you is...bad news...LEGAL! Well, bad on you. Any sentient person on the 'net could see this coming as it ain't like anyone HID the changes in US law which requires much more verification than before. Fuck! Some people don't read the news?

                                                    Sorry if I sound mean in my writings; I'm not mean at all. I have NEVER used ePass for anything and never will, even if it comes back to life. Once bitten, twice shy, you know! And all I have to do is see someone else bitten to know that the snake will bite again.

                                                    Many of us are going to have to take the losses and go on. Some of us will go down and that is really too damn bad but it is sort of the nature of things. Many of us thought we were being cute by using bogus info and now we are so cute that we can't get our money!

                                                    It ain't that pretty at all.



                                                    Some of us can pick up the peices and go on; others cannot. I am working on a method to help some of those who are facing The Abyss and will let you know when I have it put together.

                                                    Thanks for looking.

                                                    Sally.
                                                    Last edited by SallyRand; 09-09-2010, 11:23 PM.

                                                    Comment

                                                    • xxweekxx
                                                      Confirmed User
                                                      • Oct 2002
                                                      • 6780

                                                      #27
                                                      you dumbass.. why would u call them.. IF they get involved, they will freeze the money, appoint a receiver probably, and you wont see that shit for the next 10 years.. dumbass.. i hate fucks like you who go crying to fbi whenever shit happens.. you think the fbi will step in and make sure ur wire is sent?

                                                      NO. they will seize the funds, and take years looking over docs/preparing a case.. stupid man..
                                                      _________________
                                                      I am the best

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                                                      • papill0n
                                                        Unregistered Abuser
                                                        • Oct 2007
                                                        • 15547

                                                        #28
                                                        hey congratulations!!!

                                                        I think you just outed yourself as the stupidest fuck to ever post on gfy

                                                        Comment

                                                        • signupdamnit
                                                          Confirmed User
                                                          • Aug 2007
                                                          • 6697

                                                          #29
                                                          Keep in mind though that the government was probably already involved long before he posted this. For all we know that could be part of the real reason for this all happening. It's doubtful contacting the FBI will do anything more than is already occurring.

                                                          Something like this is way too big for the government not to notice.

                                                          You don't like my posts? Put me on ignore or fuck right off. I'll say what I want.

                                                          Comment

                                                          • Horny Joe
                                                            Confirmed User
                                                            • Jul 2004
                                                            • 2661

                                                            #30
                                                            Originally posted by mechanicvirus
                                                            I called the CIA and told them operation mallick was compromised and they said "The bird will be taken out" what does that mean?


                                                            Instad of asking the authorities to help, I suggest sending money to a common account (ex. epassporte, wait, no - Payoneer) and send the biggest, baddest webmasters to epass. main office, then "take the bird for a walk"
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                                                            • McSpike
                                                              Confirmed User
                                                              • May 2001
                                                              • 1042

                                                              #31
                                                              Originally posted by CYF
                                                              Why? I paid my taxes. Didn't you?
                                                              You really don't know much about the IRS. It doesn't matter whether you did pay your taxes or didn't. If what they get in their hands makes them feel they have a valid suspicion (say if you or feds involve them) and offshore banks will be treated as a valid suspicion defacto then they are going to turn you upside down not just for this income but for whatever you made and where and all for the last 5 years. They are going to shake you to see what falls out of your pocket. After they are done, they are gonna drop you on the floor, leave and tell you to pay your taxes. No apologies, no regret, nada. Come, make a mess, leave. Rightful or not. That's how they are. Period. Want that?

                                                              Comment

                                                              • MrMaxwell
                                                                Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                • Jul 2005
                                                                • 10057

                                                                #32
                                                                Originally posted by SAC
                                                                Call your local FBI field office and ask to speak with a special agent. Explain to them that a US based company dealing with an offshore Caribbean bank is holding your money hostage and refuses to allow you access to it.
                                                                You are badly broken.
                                                                I am sure that some three letters will straighten you out and glue you back together with hot sauce (your ass hole that is)

                                                                Comment

                                                                • 2intense
                                                                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                  • Dec 2009
                                                                  • 12509

                                                                  #33
                                                                  Originally posted by papill0n
                                                                  hey congratulations!!!

                                                                  I think you just outed yourself as the stupidest fuck to ever post on gfy
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                                                                  Comment

                                                                  • nico-t
                                                                    emperor of my world
                                                                    • Aug 2004
                                                                    • 29901

                                                                    #34
                                                                    hahaha like a government agency or anything related to a government is gonna help PEOPLE when was the last time a government has done anything to help people? How naive... they only squeeze people for their last penny, fuck governments

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