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Originally posted by BastarD
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PussyCash pays $100 per ImLive signupComment
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Nop, we have a $1.5 per free or $100 per signup.Originally posted by Doctor Dre
Do you guys have like free signups converting to paid like AFF and AAC does ?
But after all it is all in the convert rate.
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We pay $1.5 per free signup. I don't know of any other webcan site that pays $2.5 per free signup (no credit card), and if there is one, then after all it is all in the convert rate. I know I'm doing more money with my traffic with a few sites that are paying $20 per signup, then I'm doing with other that pays $40 per signup.Originally posted by irishfury
I asked same thing ealier...I want to test them out but there payment is a dollar lower then any others I use.
We have uploaded the $100 campaign so that even if you have great convert rates with someone else, it will be a good chance for you to test us out without risking your traffic at all.
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Why not
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who's your daddy?Comment
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Lets add a few k to postcount
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Dought Girl
What do you get when you cross a cabbagepatch doll whith the pillsbary dough boy?
A short ugly chick with a yeast infection.Comment
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Little Wanky
At a news conference, a journalist said to the politician running for the presidency, "Your secretary said publicly that you have a small penis. Would you please comment on this."
"The truth is," replied the politician, "that she has a big mouth."Comment
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Penis Requests a Raise
I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
I do physical labor
I work at great depths
I plunge head first into everything I do
I do not get weekends off or public holidays
I work in a damp environment
I don't get paid overtime
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation
I work in high temperatures
My work exposes me to contagious diseases
Dear Penis,
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight
You fall asleep on the job after brief work period
You do not always follow the orders of the management team
You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing
You'll retire well before reaching 65
You're unable to work double shifts
You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day's work. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2 suspicious looking bags.
Sincerely,
The ManagementComment
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I dont get the rules
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Don''t Say a Word
Eddie went shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally found one for a great price, but it was missing a seal, so whenever it rains, he would have to smear Vaseline over the spot where the seal should''ve been.
His girlfriend was having him over for dinner to meet her parents. He rode his new bike to her house, where she was outside waiting for him. "No matter what happens at dinner tonight, don''t say a word." She told him, "Our family had a fight awhile ago about doing dishes. We haven''t done any since, but the first person to speak at dinner has to do them."
Steve sat down for dinner and it was just how she described it. Dishes were piled up to the ceiling in the kitchen, and nobody was saying a word. So Steve decided to have a little fun. He grabbed his girlfriend, threw her on the table, and had sex with her in front of her parents. His girlfriend was a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mom horrified when he sat back down, but no one said a word.
A few minutes later he grabbed her mom, threw her on the table, and did a repeat performance. Now his girlfriend was furious, her dad was boiling, and her mother was a little happier. But still there was complete silence at the table.
All of a sudden there was a loud clap of thunder, and it started to rain. Steve remembered his motorcycle. He jumped up and grabbed his jar of Vaseline. When he witnesses this, his girlfriend''s father backed away from the table and screamed, "Okay, enough already, I''ll do the goddam dishes!"Comment
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What A Woman/Man Really Means
What a woman says, what she really means...
I need = I want
We need = I want
It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now
Do whatever you want = You are going to pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure...go ahead = I don't want you to
I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
You're so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?
I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! = I have a severe case of PMS
Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house
I want new curtains = I want new curtains, new carpeting, new furniture, new wallpaper...
I need new shoes = the other 40 pairs are simply the wrong shade
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep
Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive
How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really going to hate
I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.
Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Are you listening to me? = Too late, you're dead
Yes = No
No = No
Maybe = No
I'm sorry = You'll be sorry
I was wrong = Not as wrong as you
Do you like this recipe? = It's easy to fix, so you'd better get used to it
Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep
I'm not yelling! = Of course I'm yelling, this is important!
What a man says, what he really means...
I'm hungry = I'm hungry
I'm tired = I'm tired
Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Would you like to dance? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Can I call you sometime? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Nice dress! = Nice cleavage!
You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to fondle you
What's wrong? = What meaningless self-inflicted psycho trauma are you going through now?
You look upset = I guess sex tonight is out of the question
Yes, I love your new hairstyle = I liked it better before
Yes, your haircut looks good = $50 and it doesn't even look different!
I like the first dress you tried on better = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go!Comment
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Only #1 and #5 poster get paid?
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Yo Mama is Like a Stamp
Yo mama like a stamp: You lick her stick her then send her away.Comment
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Dear Old Dad
Q: What did Saddam Hussein have in common with his father?
A: Neither knew when to pull out!Comment
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What about #2, #3 and #4 poster?
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Little Leprechaun?
A leprechaun walks into a bar, and he see's a sign that says: "Win a pot of gold if you can make the donkey laugh."
The leprechaun decided to go for it, and he succeed in making the donkey laugh. So he goes to the bartender and asks for his pot of gold. The bartender says, "Ok, but first you have to tell us how you did it."
The leprechaun says, "I can't tell you, it's a leprechaun secret."
So the bartender says, "Then I can't give you the pot of gold." The leprechaun gets very angry and walks off.
He comes back the next day and sees a sign that says: "Win a pot of gold if you can make the donkey cry." So he trys it, and he makes the donkey cry.
He goes up to the bartender and asks for his pot of gold. But the bar attendant tells him, "First you have to tell me how you did it.
So the leprechaun says, "Alright, yesterday I told him I told him that I have a bigger penis then him, and today I showed him."Comment
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Corn Hole
A truck driver had a 2 day lay-over during the St. Patrick's Day holiday. He was getting bored with just sitting at the truck stop cafe, so he decided to go for a few beers. After about the 4th one, he had to use the bathroom badly. He went into the bathroom, and he was peeing, lhe ooked into the next stall and noticed a leprechaun whose penis was HUGE!
"Let me ask you something...how come short guys have bigger peckers than tall guys?"
In his heavy Irish accent, the leprechaun looked up and said, "I don't know laddy, i'm a leprechaun".
With that, the trucker reached out and grabbed him and said, "Well guess what? I caught ya!"
"Aye lad, that ya did, but your wishes won't come true until tomorrow morning".
The trucker was confused by this, "Why not? You're a leprechaun, I caught ya, so you are supposed to grant me 3 wishes."
"Well", began the leprechaun, "you don't know anything about us leprechauns. We get a day of the year off and it happens to be St. Patrick's Day." Well, the trucker understanding this made his 3 wishes. He wanted to own his trucking company, he wanted every woman he saw to desire his body and he wanted 10 million dollars in the bank, tax free. The leprechaun said it would be done in the morning. On his way out of the restroom, the leprechaun says, "Lad, would you like to have your wishes come true tonight?"
"Well yeah, but what's the catch?", came the reply. "Well, you gotta let a leprechaun corn-hole ya." The trucker, at first protested, but then the leprechaun reminded him of all that he would be gaining in few precious moments. Thinking about the money, the company becoming his and ALL those women, he agreed but told the leprechaun not to tell anyone. When it was all over, the leprechaun was getting ready to leave, turned to the trucker and said, "Laddy, can I ask ya a question?"
"Sure", says the trucker.
"How old are ya now?"
"I'm 40 years old" says the trucker.
With that, the leprechaun says, "You mean to tell me that you're 40 years old and still believe in leprechauns?"Comment
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The Golfer and the Leprechaun
One fine day in Ireland, a guy is out golfing and gets up to the 16th hole. He tees up and cranks one. Unfortunately, it goes into the woods on the side of the fairway.
He goes looking for his ball and comes across this little guy with this huge knot on his head, and the golf ball lying right beside him. "Goodness," says the golfer, and proceeds to revive the poor little guy.
Upon awaking, the little guy says, "Well, you caught me fair and square. I am a leprechaun. I will grant you three wishes."
The man says, "I can''t take anything from you, I''m just glad I didn''t hurt you too badly," and walks away.
Watching the golfer depart, the leprechaun thinks, "Well, he was a nice enough guy, and he did catch me, so I have to do something for him. I''ll give him the three things that I would want. I''ll give him unlimited money, a great golf game, and a great love life."
Well, a year goes past and the same golfer is out golfing on the same course at the 16th hole. He gets up and hits one into the same woods and goes off looking for his ball. When he finds the ball he sees the same little guy and asks how he is doing.
The leprechaun says, "I''m fine, and might I ask how your golf game is?"
The golfer says, "It''s great! I hit under par every time."
The leprechaun says, "I did that for you. And might I ask how your money is holding out?"
The golfer says, "Well, now that you mention it, every time I put my hand in my pocket, I pull out a ten pound note."
The leprechaun smiles and says, "I did that for you. And might I ask how your love life is?" The leprechaun says, "I did that for you. And might I ask how your money is holding out?"
The golfer says, "Well, now that you mention it, every time I put my hand in my pocket, I pull out a ten pound note."
The leprechaun smiles and says, "I did that for you. And might I ask how your love life is?"
The golfer looks at him a little shyly and says, "Well, I have a date maybe once or twice a week."
The leprechaun is floored and stammers, "Only once or twice a week?!"
The golfer, a little embarrassed, looks at him and says, "Well, that''s not too bad for a Catholic priest in a small parish."Comment
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And why #5 poster gets more than #1 poster?
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One Drunken Night
A Drunken Night A guy wakes up in a drunken stupor, opening his eyes he sees Claudia Schiffer on the bed next to him. He thinks this is a little odd, as he doesn't remember a thing, let alone going to bed with her. He decides to get up and get himself a drink from the fridge. He gets to the fridge and opens the door and is faced with a large suitcase. He takes the suitcase out of the fridge, puts it on the table and opens it to find $1 Million. This is just a little too much for the guy who thinks he is losing his mind. He wonders if he is hallucinating, so he goes to the window and draws back the blind. Outside on his front lawn is the Klu Klux Klan and dangling from the tree is an open noose, empty. They appear to be beckoning him and shouting.
Now the guy is really freaked out, he quickly draws the blind and turns around.
In the corner of his kitchen is a leprechaun, obviously drunk as well.
He asks the leprechaun what is going on.
"Well," says the leprechaun, "I was drunk last night as well, and as I was crossing the road, I was nearly run down. You ran across the road and pushed me to safety, so I granted you three wishes in return for saving me."
"Well, I can guess the first one" says the guy, "Supermodel, bed, yeah I got that one. What about the other two?"
"The money in the fridge?" says the leprechaun, "You asked for a cool million."
"And them out there?" asks the guy,
"You said you wanted to be hung like a black man."Comment
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Yo Mama Like a Stamp
Yo mama is like a postage stamp - you lick, you stick, you send her away.Comment
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77 vs 69
Why is 77 better than 69?
Because you get eight (ate) more!!!!Comment
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$100
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Deflation
A boy walks into his parents room to find his mom jumping on his dad so he runs back into his room. His mom followed him and asks, "Whats wrong, sweetie?" The boy asks, "What were you doing to daddy?" So she says, "Well sweetie you know your daddy has gotten really fat, so I was just flattening his belly for him" The boy replies, "Well what is the point if the neighbor comes over after you leave for work and blows it back up again?"Comment
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Code for Sex
There was a couple who did not want their children to know when they were going to have sex, so they decided on a code of ''writing a letter.'' One day, Daddy said to his daughter, ''Tell your mommy that Daddy wants to write a letter.'' The girl went and told her mommy and the mom said,
''The red ribbon is coming out, not now.'' The girl went back to the daddy and told him.
One day, Mommy told her daughter to tell her daddy that she wanted to write a letter. Daddy replied, ''Not now. Daddy already wrote the letter by hand.''Comment
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Im in
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Loose Potatoes
If there were 4 potatoes in a room, which one would be the prostitute?
The one that's labeled "IDAHOComment
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Swicth Hands
At a high school an English teacher is busy with work as a student approaches the teacher and asks when the test final test will be. She tells the whole class and a smart-ass jock raises his hand.
"What if that day I just stayed home because I was sexually exahausted?"
"Well, I guess you'd just have to use your other hand to write with."Comment
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Jack Off
An executive was stessed out. He had to fire one of his staff. He had narrowed it down to one of two people, either Debra or Jack. It would be a hard decision to make, since they were both equally qualified and both excellent workers. He finally decided that in the morning whichever one used the water cooler first would have to go.
Debra came in the next morning, hugely hung-over after partying all night. She went to the cooler to get some water to take a couple of aspirins and the executive approached her and said, "Debra, I've never done this before, but I have to lay you or Jack off."
Debra replied, "Could you please jack off? I have a terrible headache."Comment
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Chucky at the Movies
An old farmer went to town to see a movie. The ticket agent asked, "Sir, what's that on your shoulder?"
The old farmer said, "That's my pet rooster Chucky, wherever I go, Chucky goes."
"I'm sorry sir.", said the ticket agent, "We don't allow animals in the theater."
The old farmer went around the corner and stuffed the bird down his pants. He returned to the booth, bought a ticket and entered the theater. He sat down next to two old widows named Mildred and Marge.
The movie started and the rooster began to squirm. The old farmer unzipped his pants so Chucky could stick his head out and watch the movie.
"Marge", whispered Mildred.
"What", said Marge.
"I think this guy next to me is a pervert.", said Mildred.
"What makes you think that", asked Marge.
"He unzipped his pants and he has his thing out", whispered Mildred.
"Well, don't worry about it", said Marge, "At our age we've seen them all."
"I thought so", said Mildred, "But this one is eating my popcorn!"Comment
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Potato in the Pants
James was on the beach, and could not understand why Bob had attracted all the girls, while he had no luck. So he asked Rich "why do you get all the girls and I get nothing?"
Bob replied "take a potato and tuck it in your swimming trunks. It drives the women wild!"
So James stuffed a potato in his suit and paraded up and down the beach. Several hours later, he still had no woman.
James went to see Bob again and said "I've tried the potato and it doesn't work!"
Bob looked at James and asked, "have you tried putting the potato in the front?"Comment
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W00t
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Two Bit Girlfriend
A guy walks in and sits down at a bar. His face is all bruised and bleeding so the bartender asks, "Hey buddy, what in the world happened to you?".
The guy says, "Oh, I got in a fight with my girlfriend and I called her a two-bit whore."
"Yeah?" asks the bartender. "What did she do?"
"She hit me with her bag of quarters!".Comment
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B-Day Sex
Adam was talking to his friend at the bar, and he said, "I don't know what to get my wife for her birthday - she has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I'm stuck."
His friend said, "I have an idea! Why don't you make up a certificate saying she can have 60 minutes of great sex, any way she wants it. She'll probably be thrilled." Adam decided to to his friend's advice.
The next day at the bar his friend said, "Well? Did you take my suggestion?"
"Yes, I did," Adam replied.
"Did she like it?"
"Oh yes! she jumped up , thanked me, kissed me on the forehead and ran out the door, yelling "I'll be back in an hour!!"Comment
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Beer Translations
1. "You get this round and the next round is on me." I'll be leaving before the next round.
2. "I'll get this round and the next one is on you." Happy hour is about to end. Beers are now a dollar, but by the next round they'll be $3.50.
3. "Hey, where is that friend of yours?" I have no interest in talking to you except as a way to get your attractive friend into a compromising position.
4. "Can I get a glass of white zinfandel." (female) I'm easy.
5. "Can I get a glass of white zinfandel." (male) I'm gay.
6. "Ever try a body shot?" (male to female) I am even willing to drink tequila if it means that I get to lick you.
7. "Ever try a body shot?" (female to male) If this is how wild I am in the bar, imagine what I'll do to you on the ride home?
8. "I don't feel well, let's go home." (female) You are paying more attention to your friends than me.
9. I don't feel well, let's go home." (male) I'm horny.
10. "Who's got the next round?" I haven't bought a round in almost 3 years, but I am an expert at diverting attention.Comment
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WTF
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Marriage Requirments
A secretary for a foreign embassy was entertaining a wealthy foreign ambassador during lunch at a very expensive restaurant in uptown New York. The ambassador was so enthralled by the beauty and presence of this secretary that he asked her to marry him. The secretary was startled, but remembered that her boss told her never to insult foreign dignitaries, so she decided to let him down easy.
"I'll only marry you under three conditions."
"Anything, anything," said the ambassador.
"First, you must buy me a 14-karat gold wedding band with a 72 carat diamond, along with a 28 inch studded matching necklace for our engagement."
Without hesitation, the ambassador picked up his cellular phone, called his personal accountant, told him the instructions, and said, "Yes, yes, I buy, I buy!"
The secretary thought that her first request was too easy, so she thought of a more difficult situation.
"Second, I want you to build me a 58-acre mansion in the richest part of the Poconos along with a 40 acre summer home in the sweetest vineyards of Italy."
The ambassador picked up his phone, called his personal broker in New York, then called another broker in Italy, and after his quick conversation, he said, "Yes, yes, I build, I build!"
The secretary was very startled, and knew she must think of a final request that would be impossible to live up to.
"Finally," she said. "I'll only marry you if you have a 10 inch penis."
A sad face befell the ambassador, and he cupped his face in his hands. After weeping in his native language for a few minutes, the ambassador slowly lifted his head and said, "Ok, ok, I cut, I cut!"Comment
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The Geography of Men and Women
The Geography of a Woman
Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas.
Between the ages of 21 - 30 a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars.
Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India or Spain. Very hot, relaxed and convinced of its own beauty.
Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France or Argentina. She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.
Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Yugoslavia or Iraq. She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.
Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia or Canada. Very wide, quiet and the borders are practically unpatrolled but the frigid climate keeps people away.
Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England or Mongolia. With a glorious and all conquering past but alas no future (a bit like Tony Blair, maybe Blair's a women really).
After 70, they become Albania or Afghanistan. Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.
The Geography of a Man
Between the ages of 15 - 70 a man is like Zimbabwe - ruled by a dick.Comment
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Frenchman Walks into a Bar
A frenchman walks into a bar, smiles at the landlord and orders a glass of wine. The frenchie looks about and sees a camel sitting at the bar as well.
The frenchie asks the landlord, "What is that dirty camel doing in here?"
The Landlord pulls a cricket bat out from behind the bar hits the camel in the head and the camel gives the landlord oral pleasure.
The Landlord looks at the frenchie and says "You want a go?" to which the frenchie replies: "Oui, but there is no need to hit me over the head."Comment
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Someone, what are the rules?
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Frenchman and Farm Animals
What do you call a Frenchman with a sheep under one arm and a goat under the other?
A bisexual!Comment
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