Thankgiving Rant : FUCK Thanksgiving!
For starters, what's the idiotic fascination with Turkey?
I'm sick of everyone with the "mmm TURKEY!" like they've never fucking ate before...It's just a big goddamn chicken folks! let's move on.
And since I am ranting, we need to figure out a better etiquette for arriving and leaving at family functions. You get there, and you have to kiss and hug so many fucking people that it's no wonder you are starving by the time you sit down. Then the small talk. "how are you?" "How's the Kids?"...Please for the love of God, shut the fuck up and pass the wine so I can get my wife drunk increasing my chances of sex when we leave this torture chamber. And right about that time I have someone's dog's cold wet nose being shoved up my ass!
Now the worst part. You ate the meal...delish. Stuffed yourself like a big fat suckling pig and you want to leave. You actually have to go through the whole process again!!! it takes me long enough to get in, now that everyone is fat and lazy it's really going to be a disaster getting out. And there's always some asshole in the bathroom "making room for more" which in turn causes you to wait, and wait because it just would not be right to leave (God forbid) with shaking the jerk offs hand after he forgot to wash them.
I love them all, the food was good, but Fuck them, and fuck thanksgiving.
I'm sick of everyone with the "mmm TURKEY!" like they've never fucking ate before...It's just a big goddamn chicken folks! let's move on.
And since I am ranting, we need to figure out a better etiquette for arriving and leaving at family functions. You get there, and you have to kiss and hug so many fucking people that it's no wonder you are starving by the time you sit down. Then the small talk. "how are you?" "How's the Kids?"...Please for the love of God, shut the fuck up and pass the wine so I can get my wife drunk increasing my chances of sex when we leave this torture chamber. And right about that time I have someone's dog's cold wet nose being shoved up my ass!
Now the worst part. You ate the meal...delish. Stuffed yourself like a big fat suckling pig and you want to leave. You actually have to go through the whole process again!!! it takes me long enough to get in, now that everyone is fat and lazy it's really going to be a disaster getting out. And there's always some asshole in the bathroom "making room for more" which in turn causes you to wait, and wait because it just would not be right to leave (God forbid) with shaking the jerk offs hand after he forgot to wash them.
I love them all, the food was good, but Fuck them, and fuck thanksgiving.
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