i like to start the morning off with a good luagh:
- Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and shits gun powder. Then he uses that gun powder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life".
- In Texas the new death penalty is a roundhouse kick by Chuck Norris.
- Why does the Earth rotate? Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick.
- The dinosaurs were not killed by a comet. Chuck Norris destroyed the comet before impact. He then yelled "Psyche!" and proceeded to kill every dinosaur with his roundhouse kicks
- Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter. And he'll roundhouse kick your ass if you say otherwise.
- Chuck Norris can swallow a quarter and shit out 2 dimes. There is a 5 cent charge for this.
- If Chuck Norris ever catches Tom Cruise jumping on his couch, he'll receive a roundhouse kick to the face.
- The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris's fist.
- Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
