dude, your nick rocks man...very creative
as for a programmer, you might hit up sarettah - 2155399 -
http://www.gofuckyourself.com/member.php?u=21467
http://www.fuckingprogrammers.com/index.htm
he has worked mainstream and adult and comes with a resume that would wear out my printer
if you need any microsoft based shit done, let me know....I know one of the godfathers of ms programming...he writes books on the shit, literally