Why the english crack me up.

When they say 'do you have a fag', they mean do you have a cigarette. That's pretty weird eh.

I'm pissed. (American version of I'm angry.)
I'm pissed. (British version of I'm drunk.)

I'm mad. (American version of I'm angry.)
I'm mad. (British version of I'm crazy.)

yea i got over that a couple years ago....now i know how to bum a cigg in britain even if it is a little odd

i just thought "don't hesitate to give me a tinkle" was funny as fuck, i saw it on some english con-artist busting show yesterday

I'm sure we seem a bit queer to the Brits too...

Afterall one of our burger chains calls one of their offerings a "Biggie".

In the UK, a biggie is what a child calls his poo! Hence the reason Wendy's Hamburgers has never really taken off in England - who would buy "biggie fries"? Yuck - I'm sure you wouldn't buy poo fries! The other meaning of Biggie is erection. It just gets worse!

ADG Webmaster

thats awsome

Nice

On the way back from nc the other day i saw a "bullocks" exit, an actual town called bullocks ; )

pr0 (American version of boarwhore)
pr0 (British version of the sound when a woman take a piss)

Biggie relates to a kid having a dump here? Never heard that term.

lol..you got that "biggie" term from here right? http://www.effingpot.com/slang.shtml

Most of these seem correct but the "biggie" one I have never heard of and I grew up in the East End where cockney rhyming slang originated from.

"do you have a twink?"

LOL nice

btw, i love my british brothers & sisters....i just find it funny we play jokes on our own languages

My ex-wife and I were chatting on a bus in Miami when we realised that two elderly ladies sitting behind us were laughing. I looked round and one said, 'We're sorry, but you really talk funny'. I said 'madam, we invented the language, YOU talk funny'

I've never heard the term 'biggie' meaning a dump, and its 'bollocks', not 'bullocks'. Bollocks in interesting actually, meaning depends on content, ie:
my bollocks = my balls
that's bollocks = thats rubbish/untrue
that's THE bollocks = that's the best/the tops

Ones I often encounter when speaking to friends in America are where I will be enquiring as to how things are going and will ask "Hows tricks?". I always get a prostitution related reply. I also try to remember to avoid using the term "mates" to describe friends and avoid the use of the word "Randy" to describe horny as its a pretty common name to Americans.

My favourites!

Is someone mucking about!
That sounds a bit dodgy!

Or the best, fancy a shag do you?

One time I worked for a US bank in London. A guy in Pittsburgh H.O. I dealt with was called Lewis J. Wanker. The yanks in London used to wonder why we used to pass around any telexes we got from him whilst pissing ourselves laughing.

Oh and the all time classic on the pool or snooker table. We screw the ball back ;)

Haha thats excellent

To summarize:

arse, -hole
ass, -hole
bloody
adj., generally pejorative or intensifying
bog
toilet
bog standard
boring, normal - "vanilla"
bollocks
testicles. Also used analogously to "bullshit"
bonk
to have intercourse with (slightly less crude than "screw")
brilliant
great, terrific
bugger
an individual (rude), to foul up
bugger up
to foul up
bugger off
go away
cheers
thank you, your health, goodbye
chuffed
very pleased, almost smug ("well chuffed")
cock up
to foul up, screw up
dead
very (dead slow, dead good)
fanny
vagina
flash
ostentatious
(bit of) fluff
girlfriend, "woman" (almost always jokingly)
fuck-all (bugger-all, sod-all)

fuck me!
expression of astonishment ("well, bugger me backwards!)
get your finger out
(of your ass??) get a move on, get going
getting your oats
getting laid (sexual)
git
jerk, bastard (v. strong)
gob
mouth (as in "shut your gob") or to spit
gob-smacked
astonished
goolies
testicles
gorgeous
great, terrific
gormless
stupid, brainless
grotty
dirty, grubby
guv
short for "guv'nor" (governor) - term of address, jokingly, for an upperclass person/boss
hacked off
pissed off
jammy
smug, lucky
knacker
to tire (knackered = exhausted)
knackers
testicles (see bollocks)
"knock up"
*can* be used to mean "knocking on someone's door to wake them up (but also used in common Am. sense, to get someone pregnant)
lager lout/woofter
a rude, coarse, stupid person who drinks lager (instead of ale)
loo
toilet
love bite
hickey
`lurve'
a sarcastic term for smushy romantic love
luv
("love") - generic term of address ("sorry, luv")
off your head
crazy
oik
boor, oaf
over the top
too much, ridiculously overstated, outrageous
oy!
"hey you!" (rude)
naff
tacky, tasteless
pillock
jerk, stupid (fairly mild)
piss-up
drinking session (as, "couldn't organize a piss-up in a brewery")
pissed
drunk
piss off
to go away (or as imperative, "piss off!"), (-ed off, -ing off) or to annoy/anger
take the piss
to make fun of
piss-take
a parody or joke
pissing down
raining hard
piss-head
drunk (n.), alcoholic
piss artist
ditto
pissing oneself (laughing)
laughing very hard
pissing in the wind
useless
piss easy
very easy
piece of piss
ditto
piss around
crap around, mess around, waste time
plonker
idiot, bozo
ponce
(camp) homosexual
poofter/poof
homosexual
posh
fancy
prat
jerk: has implications of pompousness, snobbery, stupidity (moderately strong)
shattered
exhausted
shite
shit (Scouse)
shock! horror!
what a surprise! (often sarcastic), a la tabloid headlines ...
slag
loose woman, tart
slag off
to insult, abuse verbally
smarmy
unctuous, ingratiating
snog
kiss, neck
sod
generic crude term: "sod" = bum, "sod it!", "sod off", "sodding" ("bugger" is also used in all these senses except the last)
sod off
go away
stone me!
expression of surprise (see "fuck me!")
Sunshine
rude generic term of address - like "Mac"
ta
thank you
toss
"don't give a toss" - don't care
tosser
masturbator, gen. pejorative (less common than "wanker")
tart
prostitute
twee
nauseatingly cute
twit
jerk (fairly mild)
wanker/wank
masturbator, generally a hopeless/useless person/ to masturbate
waster
useless person
whinge (winge)
whine, complain
willie
penis
witter
ramble, chatter

So piss off, or play along...

ADG Webmaster

It's somewhere in the list ADG Webmaster posted

they are funny:
they brought us
monthy python etc

Addendum: "Fuck all" also means "nothing" (Americans would equate to "jack shit")

Budweiser (US) = Beer.
Budweiser (UK) = Cats piss.

Well you're a pretty ignorant fuck then aren't you?

Maybe its just your voice. I'm Scottish and no one ever tells me I talk funny. Just that I have a nice accent!

Must be the English for ya.

US = Can i bum a smoke?
UK = Can i bum a fag

thats probably the best one

Probably 'cos they can't understand you My wife's family is from Leeds and they have really strong accents. One time they all came to visit us in LA - we went out for a meal, and at the end of the evening as were leaving the restaurant me and my wife frequent one of the waitresses asked us what language they were speaking. I told her it was a little used northern dialect called "By'eckian"...

Ah, the traditional politeness of the jock. I said it jokingly and they LAUGHED, thought that was a good one. Oh well, you can't please everyone all the time. talking of being English, Crocodile Dundee's got a lot to ask to answer for - I got fed up with people asking me in Orlando if I was Australian. I worked in Chicago for a while and it never happened, perhaps people in the north are more cosmopolitan than southern rednecks .....

I also lived and worked in Scotland, in Falkirk, for two years and even other jocks can't understand glaswegians. (I'm not saying Ross is a glaswegian - or he may be for all I know)

I love how they use the term "bloody" in their every sentence.