13 Things Your Computer Person Won?t Tell You

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  • Pete-KT
    Workin With The Devil
    • Oct 2004
    • 51532

    #1

    13 Things Your Computer Person Won?t Tell You

    1. Turn it off, turn it back on. ?Nine times out of ten, rebooting your computer-and any equipment that connects to it-will solve the problem,? says Aaron Schildkraut, who owns a home tech-support service in the New York tristate area.

    2. Just because we're ?buddies? at work, don't expect me to come running every time you've got a problem. I've got a slew of IT problems to fix.

    3. We're like Santa: We know if you've been bad or good. Fessing up to what really happened right before the system crashed is going to save time-and I'm going to figure it out anyway.

    4. Use ?strong? passwords. Geek Squad agent Derek Meister suggests combining letters and numbers-but not your birth date-to create a ?base? password, and adding a unique suffix for each site you use. If your base password is your spouse's initials and
    your anniversary date (say, SP061789), your Amazon password might be ?SP061789AM.?

    5. Make sure you have current antivirus and anti-spyware protection, and set it to update at least once a day and run a full-system scan at least once a week.

    6. There's no free lunch. Downloading free music, movies, and games from file-sharing sites can open holes in your system for others to exploit. Play it safe and use established services like Rhapsody, iTunes, and Netflix.

    7. Remember: Public Wi-Fi is public. If you don't have a compelling reason to check your e-mail or bank account while sipping a latte at the mall, don't do it. While you're on a public network, even one that's encrypted, a nearby hacker can capture your passwords.

    8. Give it a rest. Turning off your computer when it's not in use saves energy and clears out the RAM, or temporary memory, which would otherwise slow your machine over time.

    9. If you can't get online, call your Internet service provider first. Connection problems can often be checked and fixed-free.

    10. If you want to see less of me, get a Mac. That's what we use. ?Macs are actually a little bad for my business,? says Schildkraut.

    11. No, you can't use your cell phone to pop popcorn. Next time an Internet rumor drops into your inbox, don't just pass it on-check it out at snopes.com first.

    12. Sometimes we talk about you-in code. If you hear ?HKI error? (for human-keyboard interface) or ?PEBCAK? (problem exists between chair and keyboard), we're insulting you.

    13. If you don't understand me, I'm not doing my job. Confusing tech jargon is a sign of insecurity, not intelligence.
  • Jon Clark - BANNED FOR LIFE
    North Coast Pimp
    • Dec 2005
    • 9395

    #2
    good post...


    12. Sometimes we talk about you-in code. If you hear “HKI error” (for human-keyboard interface) or “PEBCAK” (problem exists between chair and keyboard), we're insulting you.

    Comment

    • gornyhuy
      Chafed.
      • May 2002
      • 18041

      #3
      #10 is the biggest bullshit I've ever heard.

      icq:159548293

      Comment

      • A-n-D-r-E-S
        Confirmed User
        • Aug 2008
        • 3949

        #4
        Nice!
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        Comment

        • fluffygrrl
          So Fucking Banned
          • May 2006
          • 2187

          #5
          Originally posted by Pete-KT
          4. Use “strong” passwords. Geek Squad agent Derek Meister suggests combining letters and numbers-but not your birth date-to create a “base” password, and adding a unique suffix for each site you use. If your base password is your spouse's initials and your anniversary date (say, SP061789), your Amazon password might be “SP061789AM.”
          By far the most retarded idea ever.

          8. Give it a rest. Turning off your computer when it's not in use saves energy and clears out the RAM, or temporary memory, which would otherwise slow your machine over time.
          Also don't forget to periodically rotate the power knob.

          Comment

          • SteveHardeman
            Confirmed User
            • Jul 2008
            • 1728

            #6
            Dammit Pete, now I have to change my amazon password.

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            Questions? I-C-Q: 3Five1FiveFive3476

            Comment

            • Quagmire
              Confirmed User
              • Jul 2005
              • 6490

              #7
              Any recommendations on what to use when cleaning the integrated cupholder?

              Comment

              • Pete-KT
                Workin With The Devil
                • Oct 2004
                • 51532

                #8
                Originally posted by Quagmire
                Any recommendations on what to use when cleaning the integrated cupholder?
                Ya they make this lil thing called a CD cleaner try it out, its cleans the soda out of the cup holder

                Comment

                • Rochard
                  Jägermeister Test Pilot
                  • Dec 2001
                  • 75764

                  #9
                  Originally posted by gornyhuy
                  #10 is the biggest bullshit I've ever heard.
                  I don't get that either..... I've been running Vista for a solid six months know and I haven't had a single problem. They've come a long way since Windows 95!
                  Herschel Savage
                  Brooklyn, NY

                  Comment

                  • SilentKnight
                    Megan Fox's fluffer
                    • Oct 2005
                    • 24812

                    #10
                    Originally posted by Pete-KT
                    10. If you want to see less of me, get a Mac. That's what we use. “Macs are actually a little bad for my business,” says Schildkraut.
                    Spoken by a true Mac elitist, no doubt.

                    Mac loves to grab the ankles of the person on the ladder ahead of them.

                    Comment

                    • tony299
                      lurker
                      • Aug 2002
                      • 57021

                      #11
                      my friend worked in it support and they would say did you rtfm ? I was like what does that mean Read the fucking manual. lol

                      Comment

                      • GigoloShawn
                        Confirmed User
                        • Oct 2007
                        • 700

                        #12
                        These all elected an eyeroll from me, but number 8 is so stupid and inaccurate that it actually caused damage.. If you see an iris, it's mine.
                        I no longer represent TrafficGigolos, please contact Justin or Rebecca with any issues.

                        Comment

                        • Marky333
                          Confirmed User
                          • Jun 2006
                          • 974

                          #13
                          Yeah the nicest thing is when you go to fix a problem and the computer is broke....
                          Person with the problem: Why did it broke??? ....
                          IT Specialist: Why does it rain outside?

                          Comment

                          • Kudles
                            Confirmed User
                            • Feb 2003
                            • 5477

                            #14
                            Thanks for the advice
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                            Comment

                            • TheDoc
                              Too lazy to set a custom title
                              • Jul 2001
                              • 13827

                              #15
                              Originally posted by fluffygrrl
                              By far the most retarded idea ever.
                              Wow, ever?


                              What password would you suggest the average, not daily, computer user, use so they can remember what the password is after weeks or months of not using it?
                              ~TheDoc - ICQ7765825
                              It's all disambiguation

                              Comment

                              • Vegas Ken
                                Confirmed User
                                • Sep 2006
                                • 4151

                                #16
                                Originally posted by SteveHardeman
                                Dammit Pete, now I have to change my amazon password.
                                That is too funny!
                                Skype: vegas_ken

                                Comment

                                • ISPrime_dimi
                                  Confirmed User
                                  • Jul 2008
                                  • 228

                                  #17
                                  i see someone's been reading RD
                                  good post!

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                                  Comment

                                  • gimo33
                                    Confirmed User
                                    • Mar 2006
                                    • 5599

                                    #18
                                    Originally posted by Pete-KT
                                    12. Sometimes we talk about you-in code. If you hear ?HKI error? (for human-keyboard interface) or ?PEBCAK? (problem exists between chair and keyboard), we're insulting you.
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                                    Comment

                                    • fluffygrrl
                                      So Fucking Banned
                                      • May 2006
                                      • 2187

                                      #19
                                      Originally posted by TheDoc
                                      Wow, ever?


                                      What password would you suggest the average, not daily, computer user, use so they can remember what the password is after weeks or months of not using it?
                                      Well since you ask.

                                      The key to remembering passwords is in not thinking about them.

                                      Pick ANY 16 character string of evil nonsense. It has to be nonsense. Meaningful stuff does not work, and at all. Even if it's just a little meaningful.

                                      Then go to the site and log in and back out 12 times right off. Type it in every time. That day, log in and off again every couple of hours 4 times in a row. That week log in and off coupla times every day.

                                      Provided you log in more than once a month, you will remember that sucka like Pavlov's dog : Couldn't tell anyone what the fuck it was, if they tortured you, but in front of the proper login screen it'll just magically type itself.

                                      It's how the brain of mammals work, and so provided you're not mentally inferior to the average rat, you will never forget a password again. This may not work if you've ever had a stroke.

                                      Comment

                                      • Shey
                                        Confirmed User
                                        • Aug 2005
                                        • 1654

                                        #20
                                        Originally posted by TheDoc
                                        Wow, ever?


                                        What password would you suggest the average, not daily, computer user, use so they can remember what the password is after weeks or months of not using it?
                                        Roboform, just started using it and loving it so far.
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                                        Comment

                                        • TheDoc
                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                          • Jul 2001
                                          • 13827

                                          #21
                                          Originally posted by fluffygrrl
                                          Well since you ask.

                                          The key to remembering passwords is in not thinking about them.

                                          Pick ANY 16 character string of evil nonsense. It has to be nonsense. Meaningful stuff does not work, and at all. Even if it's just a little meaningful.

                                          Then go to the site and log in and back out 12 times right off. Type it in every time. That day, log in and off again every couple of hours 4 times in a row. That week log in and off coupla times every day.

                                          Provided you log in more than once a month, you will remember that sucka like Pavlov's dog : Couldn't tell anyone what the fuck it was, if they tortured you, but in front of the proper login screen it'll just magically type itself.

                                          It's how the brain of mammals work, and so provided you're not mentally inferior to the average rat, you will never forget a password again. This may not work if you've ever had a stroke.
                                          And now we know which answer was more retarded.
                                          ~TheDoc - ICQ7765825
                                          It's all disambiguation

                                          Comment

                                          • TheDoc
                                            Too lazy to set a custom title
                                            • Jul 2001
                                            • 13827

                                            #22
                                            Originally posted by Shey
                                            Roboform, just started using it and loving it so far.
                                            Roboform is for sure one handy tool, a tad annoying with the password stuff but a solid time saver either way.

                                            I don't think tech support people can really dish out something like Roboform to the average caller and they get it any more than understanding why they need a complex password.
                                            Last edited by TheDoc; 09-16-2008, 10:59 PM.
                                            ~TheDoc - ICQ7765825
                                            It's all disambiguation

                                            Comment

                                            • aico
                                              Moo Moo Cow
                                              • Mar 2004
                                              • 14748

                                              #23
                                              All you need to know is #10. The rest will no longer exist.

                                              Comment

                                              • pornask
                                                So Fucking Banned
                                                • Aug 2006
                                                • 6518

                                                #24
                                                Whatever credibility this post may have had was lost at #10.

                                                Comment

                                                • fluffygrrl
                                                  So Fucking Banned
                                                  • May 2006
                                                  • 2187

                                                  #25
                                                  Originally posted by TheDoc
                                                  And now we know which answer was more retarded.
                                                  Not only do we know which answer was more retarded, but we also know how smart the person asking the question was.

                                                  Comment

                                                  • Matt 26z
                                                    So Fucking Banned
                                                    • Apr 2002
                                                    • 18481

                                                    #26
                                                    Originally posted by Pete-KT
                                                    8. Give it a rest. Turning off your computer when it's not in use saves energy and clears out the RAM, or temporary memory, which would otherwise slow your machine over time.
                                                    How many watts does an idle computer use?

                                                    Comment

                                                    • TheDoc
                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                      • Jul 2001
                                                      • 13827

                                                      #27
                                                      Originally posted by fluffygrrl
                                                      Not only do we know which answer was more retarded, but we also know how smart the person asking the question was.
                                                      You are an odd fellow... to say the least.
                                                      ~TheDoc - ICQ7765825
                                                      It's all disambiguation

                                                      Comment

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