Ofcourse this is the typical male stoner tourist guide
1: If youre not used to weed or only shitty weed take it easy on your first day. The Dutch weed is about the strongest you will ever smoke and you WILL get fucked up.
2: You can smoke a joint in the streets, np. Most clubs allow you to smoke inside as well. Smaller bars usually not. You better ask first if in doubt. Or go sit in a coffeeshop ofcourse, where they sell weed. Avoid the loud trourist coffeeshops like the bulldog. Full of drunk English tourists and insane prices.
3: Dont buy drugs on the street. You will get ripped off. In the red light area every 2 mins some guy on the street will say something to you. Simply ignore them.
4: If you plan to eat something with weed in it take it easy. It can take up to 1 hour before it starts kicking in. And you wont be first to eat half the cake because you dont feel anything after 5 mins.
5: Americans are good tippers. You dont have to tip 10 - 15% here in Holland. If you buy drinks and the bill is 9.20 its normal to tip just 80 cts. If the bill is 7.50 tell the waiter to "make it 9". A 2 person meal costing 45 euros, you can tip 2 to 5 euros. Up to you. This advice will save you plenty of money - buy me drinks when you see me. Or drugs.
6: Hookers in the red light area. I dont know the exact prices. Id say anything between 25 to 100 euros for a quicky. General rule: The uglier they are the less you pay and vice versa. The hot blondes with big tits are known to be total bitches who try to get you out of their booth as soon as possible. After paying way too much. Id say avoid them.
7: The fuck shows are tourist traps. You pay 50 bucks or so to see a couple on stage fuck like 2 robots. Thats it. Save your money.
8: Watch out for bikers. They are everywhere. I really mean everywhere.
I will add more later...taking a shower now.