If I had that job I would be surfing all your sites - they would have to call me the "Special Masturbater". I wouldn't even have to look at the list...the DOJ would say, "Hey, Special M", is such and such site on the list?", and I could give them a complete synopsis. Hell, I wouldn't have to answer, they could tell by the smile on my face and the woody in my pants.
Where do I apply?
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