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Originally Posted by chase
i'm scared, and maybe i did post because i wanted reassurance, but what I consciously hoped for was a compromise. I am not telling him he can't see the kids. i wouldn't mind if he stayed here from the moment they woke up til the moment they went to bed, in fact I have encouraged him to see them as much as he possibly can. HE has chosen not to. He has chosen not to call. Had he not been able to pay the support, but had still been interested in the kids, I wouldn't be so afraid, because I wouldn't feel he is trying to hide a relapse from me.
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My ex-husband had 2 girls from a previous marriage, and at times he had trouble paying his support like you're husband he had a problem with drugs too. When he didn't pay he wouldn't call or see his girls because he felt guilty about not being able to pay his support, he felt like he didn't deserve to see them. It was never that he didn't want to see them he just didn't feel worthy. But the times he was with his girls he was really a great father to them. I'm just telling you this to maybe give you a view of things he may be thinking or feeling.
Let go of the two weeks that he didn't call or see them, you can't change it so no need to stress out over it. Try to figure out a way to make things work for fathers day. If you're concern is that he'll do drugs then talk to him about that concern without the kids around. If you let the kids go with him to his fathers call and check on them a couple times while they're there, but at least give him a chance, you said there will be other adults there so the kids should be ok.
Also make sure he knows that even if he can't pay on time every time that the kids are still his and he should never feel like he can't see them. the money issues are between you two, it doesn't involve the kids.