Are STD tests painful? - GoFuckYourself.com - Adult Webmaster Forum

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xenigo

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#1

Are STD tests painful?

06-15-2005, 11:15 PM

I stupidly boned some chick on Myspace on Friday without a condom. Um, I guess I should get tested. Are STD tests painful? I read somewhere that they'll jam a cotton swab stick half-way down your wang. That sounds painful as hell.

Is that the standard procedure??? I sure as fuck hope not.
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GatorB

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#2

06-15-2005, 11:18 PM

Originally posted by xenigo

I stupidly boned some chick on Myspace on Friday without a condom. Um, I guess I should get tested. Are STD tests painful? I read somewhere that they'll jam a cotton swab stick half-way down your wang. That sounds painful as hell.

Is that the standard procedure??? I sure as fuck hope not.

Yes they do( well not half way but enough ). It hurts more than you'd think a Q-tip would. Actually it's hurts long AFTER it's out. And don't try peeing for oh about a day after you get that done.

AIDS and syphylis tests are blood tests.
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machinegunkelly

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#3

06-15-2005, 11:26 PM

Yes .. it hurts like a BITCH .
Apparently they offer a urine test now ... look into it .

I Remember my one and only clamydia (sp? ) / clap test .. I walked home funny and felt like I was violated .

It was kinda funny cause she did the " big " swab and I thought " wow " that was easy .. so I looked at the little one and thought it would be easier .. fuck no , they jam it about 1 inch up yer cock at full speed cause they know you're gonna freak .

I busted up 2 knuckles on the table while she did it , cause I punched the table instead of the old bitch doing it

Good luck buddy .. wrap your cock next time

dead.
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xenigo

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#4

06-15-2005, 11:28 PM

Damn you guys are freaking me out! I guess I'll go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow. Any idea how long the results take?
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NTSS

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#5

06-15-2005, 11:29 PM

Originally posted by xenigo

...I read somewhere that they'll jam a cotton swab stick half-way down your wang. That sounds painful as hell.

Is that the standard procedure??? I sure as fuck hope not.

Yep that would be correct...Ouch!!!

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machinegunkelly

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#6

06-15-2005, 11:30 PM

Originally posted by xenigo

Damn you guys are freaking me out! I guess I'll go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow. Any idea how long the results take?

no idea .. they only called if you were + where I went .. luckily I was clean as a whistle

In all seriousness , an adult webmaster of ALL PEOPLE should know to wrap his cock before bangin some skank ..

Live and learn bro

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xenigo

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#7

06-15-2005, 11:44 PM

Originally posted by machinegunkelly

no idea .. they only called if you were + where I went .. luckily I was clean as a whistle

In all seriousness , an adult webmaster of ALL PEOPLE should know to wrap his cock before bangin some skank ..

Live and learn bro

I always have, except there was just some incredible urge to not, at this particular moment... I didn't have any handy, and I had been drinking quite a bit that evening. Honestly I hate condoms.

Bad mistake I know.
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#8

06-15-2005, 11:46 PM

If you're not pissing bullets within a week you don't need any tests
for VD!

If you're worried about AIDS wiat 6 months then get a blood test.
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rickholio

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#9

06-16-2005, 12:02 AM

Before I got married I thought I'd do the responsible thing and get myself screened across the entire spectrum of STDs. The whole gamut... pee in a cup, about 283942 vials of blood, etc.

The doctor was balking at the qtip thing... he asked, "Are you SURE you want to do this? It's rather uncomfortable." I've never been the kind of guy to do anything by half measures, so yep, hook me up doc, I can take it.

Now, up to that point I'd experienced a wide variety of manner and intensity of pain, ranging from gunshot to having my foot run over by a 1 1/2 tonne with a full welding rig. This was an entirely new and excruciating form of pain, and my experience with it was shared by all the people in the waiting room, some of whom found my particular choices of curses (I later found out) caused them to run in near panic.

It will HURT LIKE HELL. Be prepared. Bring something to bite down on.

Oh yeah, both the wifey and I were completely clean of everything. Ain't that a bitch?

Last edited by rickholio; 06-16-2005, 12:03 AM.

~
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#10

06-16-2005, 12:11 AM

Link us to the myspace profile. LOL
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xenigo

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#11

06-16-2005, 01:20 AM

I lucked out bigtime. Check this out, quoted from the Planned Parenthood website.

We can now screen for the most common bacterial sexually transmitted diseases--gonorrhea and chlamydia--using a urine sample.
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#12

06-16-2005, 01:25 AM

I got tested across the baord a few months back... Told them to screen for everything... I think I got 3-4 vials of blood and a piss test to be checked for everything...

All negative, thank god after some of the sluts I have banged back when I owned my bar!! And of course I didn't wear protection stupidly...

The scariest one, is waiting that week for the AIDS test results... There are only 300 people or so infected in my area (reported anyways) but you still never know ... I was sweating bullets for a week everything I thought about it for a 'second'

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BIGTYMER

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#13

06-16-2005, 01:28 AM

Its ez! The Q-Tip only hurts for a sec.
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GiantGnome

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#14

06-16-2005, 02:41 AM

wow! I was going to be funny and say only the results can be painful. nevermind.

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swedguy

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#15

06-16-2005, 02:46 AM

Last one I got was not painful. The cotton swab thing doesn't even feel much.
The worst part of it is waiting for the phone call, even though you know you're clean
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xenigo

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#16

06-16-2005, 02:54 AM

Originally posted by swedguy

Last one I got was not painful. The cotton swab thing doesn't even feel much.
The worst part of it is waiting for the phone call, even though you know you're clean

I'm really not too freaked out, but my ex-girlfriend pointed out that "the girl is obviously a slut" because she had something kind of elluding to the fact that she'd fuck any guy who'd take her out this weekend. So it somewhat worries me that there may be quite a list of guys she's done this with.

For the record she told me there had been 3 guys she had been with prior to myself. Averaging out the national statistics of STD's I figure I'm not in grave danger. But who knows. It's not like a slut would be honest about her history anyway.

What REALLY has me worried is my ex-girlfriend says she won't have sex with me anymore until I get the test results and they're negative. And we were supposed to be going up to Clear Lake this weekend.
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swedguy

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#17

06-16-2005, 02:56 AM

Your ex sounds like a wise woman
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zentz

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#18

06-16-2005, 03:11 AM

painfull or not, make them...

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xenigo

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#19

06-16-2005, 04:07 AM

Alright we did NOT need to see that.
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pussyluver

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#20

06-16-2005, 04:17 AM

And if you have a little dick,it's way worse. You think they have different size swabs for different size cocks - nope.

Somebody has to stop this crap. All are yankin your chain. It plain isn't that bad. I've had all the tests. The smear, the swab, the booldtests... The worse would be the blood test I guess if you're affraid of those???? It's more the thought of it, so chill out. I'd get tested right away so I could start doin that ex again soon.
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#21

06-16-2005, 04:44 AM

This thread scares me

No sig.
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The Ghost

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#22

06-16-2005, 04:45 AM

No as painful as the STD it's self. Keep us posted on whatcha catch

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#23

06-16-2005, 05:02 AM

Originally posted by xenigo

I lucked out bigtime. Check this out, quoted from the Planned Parenthood website.

Don't be a pussy go for the qtip it will remind you not to do that again...Seriously though I hope I don't see you on the maury povich show in a year on one of those are you my babies daddy episodes

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#24

06-16-2005, 05:05 AM

Originally posted by rickholio

Before I got married I thought I'd do the responsible thing and get myself screened across the entire spectrum of STDs. The whole gamut... pee in a cup, about 283942 vials of blood, etc.

The doctor was balking at the qtip thing... he asked, "Are you SURE you want to do this? It's rather uncomfortable." I've never been the kind of guy to do anything by half measures, so yep, hook me up doc, I can take it.

Now, up to that point I'd experienced a wide variety of manner and intensity of pain, ranging from gunshot to having my foot run over by a 1 1/2 tonne with a full welding rig. This was an entirely new and excruciating form of pain, and my experience with it was shared by all the people in the waiting room, some of whom found my particular choices of curses (I later found out) caused them to run in near panic.

It will HURT LIKE HELL. Be prepared. Bring something to bite down on.

Oh yeah, both the wifey and I were completely clean of everything. Ain't that a bitch?

All that and the test came back NEGATIVE?? Man that sucks!

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#25

06-16-2005, 05:11 AM

Originally posted by zentz

painfull or not, make them...

oh shift.
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sweetcuties

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#26

06-16-2005, 05:12 AM

damn, I feel bad for you. For the past 2yrs I've been getting std tests and it hurts like a bitch. Just wait till you try to take a piss after you leave the doctors office. It hurts for a day or so and that pain is unreal!
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