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Take your laptop with you and start editing and correcting pictures of porn, while your waiting to be called. If the judge asks just promise him a date with Jemma Jameson.
Seriously, tell them you're a self employed pornographer and and want to do your bit. No one will want you anywhere near a trial. You will be truthful and honest and will not get messed with.
Mess with a judge and he may hold you in contempt or just keep you in the jury room for 3 weeks.
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