In an effort to save you the time and effort of emailing me relentlessly with your offers, I will fill you in on the following 411 about me, no charge:
- I do not need Viagra, Cialis or any other "life enhancing" drug ... yet. Try me again in about 15 years and we may do business.
- No, I have never seen a small 5t0ck "take off". What is a 5t0ck anyway?
- I got a cheap, imitation Rolex for Christmas. My wrist is now green, but thanks for asking.
- I do not need "debt consolidation" nor to relieve my financial burdens the "Christian Way". I'm not Christian. Besides, I just call my parents, they send me cash. Debt consolidated.
- Look I feel bad that your lonely tonight "coz" your boyfriend, you know, is a real drag and, like, you're feeling kinda kinky and naughty. Buy a dildo.
- If you are going to send a customized email to get my attention please get the name right. I'm not Trevor, Hubert, Robbie or Alex. Guadlupe is right out.
- I feel downright awful that a rich Nigerian client of yours died in a horrible car accident and that you have to find a way to "clean" the $25 million he left. My bank would die of shock if I deposited more than $43 at once. Sorry.
- I cleared my student debt a long time ago by prostituting myself at a retirement home. It wasn't pretty but I'm free.
- I'd love to see 2 blonde teen trannies getting rammed by a well-hung brother from the ghetto but my credit card is maxed from the cam shows I'm forced to watch 24/7. Good luck though - sounds like you got a winnner!
Okay, now please stop and let me Inbox take a breather?
