Originally Posted by Sir Basil

Before rising and shining
Before brushing my teeth
Before I feed my pet
Before a lit cigarette

I need to jack off

Before taking a shower
Before gargling mouthwash
Before lifting the toilet seat
To take a leak

I have to beat my meat

Before the eggs get scrambled
Before the toast is toasted
Before the coffee beans are roasted

I gotta choke my chicken

Before the tie is tied
Before my shoes are tied
Before the bacon is fried

I must spank my monkey

Before the paper is read
Before I get outta bed
Before good morning is said

I?m going to drain my balls
While thinking of a hot gal thru it all