my father cheated on my mother when I was about 11 and I know how much it can fuck up things. I have witnessed it firsthand as being a child of a divorced parents.
I have vowed to never cheat on anyone I love because I know what the end result is and it is never good. I also think it makes you lesser of a person if you are the cheating type.
I think the number of people who cheat on their spouses ONLY at conventions is very low. Those I know who habitually cheat do it all the time
As far as lying and trust, I don't see it as a lying and trust issue. I see it as an ego issue. They usually have either a very low opinion of themselves and need to build it up by cheating or a have a very big ego and think the "rules" don't apply to them.
And I do agree with Elli - there are MANY ways to cheat which aren't sexual. And of course, swingers are except from this conversation - they are being honest with their partner
Originally posted by CDSmith That's called flirting, not cheating. Flirting can be hurtful in some cases, but if he trusts you implicitly (which he should) then he should be secure enough with himself to handle it.
After all, you are in a very social position in a very social business.
Originally posted by CDSmith Agreed, except for use of the word "man". Real men (or women) don't need to lie or cheat, they are true to their word and do what they say, say what they mean.
There is something very defective about someone who feels the need to cheat.
That last statement is so true. I'm loving seeing you guys posting like real men....This is so refreshing.
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Originally posted by Fletch XXX man are you people for real?
Are you adults?
not know WHAT CHEATING IS?
hahaha
There are different levels of cheating and it doesn't stop and end with sex.
It's like saying rape is about the sex when it's really about power.
So you have to look at cheating and see what it is really about.
A man who would rather spend his weekends in a boat fishing instead of staying home with his family is cheating.
A man who would rather spend every night at a bar talking to friends and coming home when everyone else has gone to bed is cheating.
I know you think this is a strange way of looking at things, but most counselors would agree.
The point is that once you put your focus, time and energy and devote it to something else other than your love one or loved ones...you are cheating.
I am not speaking about the once in a month incident, or the occassional outing...I'm referring to men who do this kind of stuff day in and day out.
A lot of incidents of the cheating you're describing begin this way.
For example my uncle started with hunting and fishing. This guy would even leave on holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas and go fishing..everyone else in the family there and he would leave...he would do this when they spent holidays alone.
He wasn't doing anything but actual hunting and fishing...but he was also coming to some sort of realization that he wasn't getting whatever he felt he needed at home...and this is where the cheating really begins. They start looking for other things to fill that "void" in their lives.
Whether it's friends, substances, hobbies or some piece of tail.
So before it was all over with he was banging his secreteray...living in a town of only 3,000 it didn't take too long for everyone to figure it out.
He lost his job, and put his family through some serious pain not to mention a bit of financial insecurity.
Anyway to answer your question in regards to the cheating you're discussing....I'm sure it goes on...and I'm sure some of it includes the top people in this biz.
I highly doubt somebody is going to come into this thread and say, hell yeah I cheat on my spouse at conventions, what else am I supposed to do? But I am sure it goes on. But who are we to judge somebody elses life situation, although I don't agree with cheating at all.
If I was to cheat I would not stay with my current partner, as it's not worth it if I am going to cheat, then it's not real love and I am wasting my time.
If I find out my man cheats on me, I leave him and move on, life deals many emotional roller coasters but it is still always worth the experience. Live and Learn.
You can't live your life being afraid, or you will miss out on a lot.
Being cheated on sucks and cheating on someone sucks. I see it ALL the time at conventions. I am sure that some have arrangements, but for the most part a lot don't.
I can't be bothered cheating, I can't handle the guilt at all. I figured you wouldn't get the answers that you were looking for in this thread. Cheaters very rarely out themselves LOL
To me cheating is a lot more than the act of sex itself. I would be just as hurt to know that my partner was intimate in anyway with anyone. Kissing someone else would be enough to send me over the edge...I have knives and know how to use them ;)
Originally posted by sherie Being cheated on sucks and cheating on someone sucks. I see it ALL the time at conventions. I am sure that some have arrangements, but for the most part a lot don't.
I can't be bothered cheating, I can't handle the guilt at all. I figured you wouldn't get the answers that you were looking for in this thread. Cheaters very rarely out themselves LOL
To me cheating is a lot more than the act of sex itself. I would be just as hurt to know that my partner was intimate in anyway with anyone. Kissing someone else would be enough to send me over the edge...I have knives and know how to use them ;)
folks, I never said going fishing instead of spending time with your girl asnt cheating, nor did say "sex" specifically in the original post.
I said simply "who cheats at conventions"
whethers its kissing, geting your dick sucked, buying some slut a 10k ring, whatever.
geez, dont try to analyze my threads so much, its just to get people thinking nothing more.
the reason it was towards men is because if I made a thread bashing women for cheating I would have had women in here saying it was one sided, its easier to fuck with guys.
look at all the long replies from en in this thread.... conscience maybe?
Originally posted by AdultLoungeRaffi never have and never will ....she comes with me :-)
I am with you on this one Raffi but there are very few people that can say that and it is not just an "adult industry" thing it is an unfortunate way of life!!!
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Cheating is not exclusive to this industry. I know many men who look forward to their industry 'shows' and the associated rewards as opportunities to play with no witnesses.
One man I know works for a gov't lobby group, and he received a performance bonus of a trip and a hooker.
Originally posted by Elli There are shades to this. ....
agreed, and just what I was thinking...
I've been hooked up for over 12 years and never put 'the governor' in any stranger's orifices if that's what you're asking...
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Have you guys seen the majority of people in this industry?
If they are cheating, they are doing so because they are PAYING someone for the sex. Majority of the big talkers on this board couldn't get their dick sucked in a female prison if they didn't have a few bucks.
Originally posted by Fletch XXX
[B]folks, I never said going fishing instead of spending time with your girl asnt cheating, nor did say "sex" specifically in the original post.
I said simply "who cheats at conventions"
whethers its kissing, geting your dick sucked, buying some slut a 10k ring, whatever.
geez, dont try to analyze my threads so much, its just to get people thinking nothing more.
No but this is what I responded too...
man are you people for real?
Are you adults?
not know WHAT CHEATING IS?
hahaha
I was just trying to get you to think, nothing more. ;)
Originally posted by eroswebmaster No but this is what I responded too...
I was just trying to get you to think, nothing more. ;)
Elli said giving hugs...
how can that be cheating? unless she has feeling for the people. I hug my friends all the time hahaha my girl hugs my guy friends when they leave, thats common.
who fucking cares if HE cheats...as long as HE pays you for your work...If you don't trust HIM, charge him half up front.
A dude fucking a stray twat doesn't have jack shit to do with something that he will pay for to help make him money...For most people, twat doesn't make money, it COSTS money. There is no correlation between pussy and business..If it was.
Nike wouldn't do business with Michael Jordan
Sprite wouldn't do business with Lebron James (he ain't married but he has a baby on the way and still likes looking at other girls)
Jello Pudding wouldn't hire Bill Cosby
GM wouldn't have let Jack Welch run GE and become a legendary CEO.
Hell, I could go on and on...Maybe in some fairyland someone can say that they don't do biz with cheaters but in the real world, it isn't practical nor feasible.
I also noticed how there was no SHE mentioned at all.....So this is probably a male bashing thread instead of a cheating PERSON thread.
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