uncoolest thing ever...last night my girlfriend went out with friends, so - GoFuckYourself.com - Adult Webmaster Forum

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Shaddam IV

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#1

uncoolest thing ever...last night my girlfriend went out with friends, so

02-26-2005, 01:05 PM

i had some guys over to play madden. we started drinking rum and got pretty drunk. my friend did a pro wrestling style leap and landed on the couch killing her cat. he was sleeping under a blanket...it was not intentional.

my girlfriend had to go to her mom's today and was just bawling. i'm in deep fucking shit and now her family is going to know.

i'm didnt like the cat much, but fuck. i doubt our relationship is going to survive this one, she already thinks we are a bunch of drunks.

she is scarred.
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Manowar

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#2

02-26-2005, 01:06 PM

that's funny as shit.

not for the cat, obviously.
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FredIsMe

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#3

02-26-2005, 01:09 PM

dont let a woman come between friends.
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Major (Tom)

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#4

02-26-2005, 01:10 PM

damn man.. that sucks. poor pussy.

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Danny Dukes

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#5

02-26-2005, 01:10 PM

That sucks, pfffffffffffff bahahahaha

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DarkJedi

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#6

02-26-2005, 01:12 PM

My cat had 2 front legs (arms?) broke, attacked and almost killed by dogs, fell out of a 2nd story window, and got hit by a car, and finally, poisoned. He's alive, just retarded.

A body falling on a cat on a couch would not kill it.
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#7

02-26-2005, 01:13 PM

You told her the truth? You should have tossed it in the middle of the street and said it was hit by a car.
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#8

02-26-2005, 01:13 PM

Boondock saints, the GFY version ;)
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#9

02-26-2005, 01:14 PM

Sorry to hear about the cat and your relationship

good luck too you!

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polish_aristocrat

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#10

02-26-2005, 01:14 PM

I don't use ICQ anymore.
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#11

02-26-2005, 01:15 PM

Originally posted by Antonio

Boondock saints, the GFY version ;)

I was going to say something like that. LOL
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#12

02-26-2005, 01:17 PM

Originally posted by Cylon

You told her the truth? You should have tossed it in the middle of the street and said it was hit by a car.

LMFAO

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sonofsam

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#13

02-26-2005, 01:18 PM

Originally posted by DarkJedi

My cat had 2 front legs (arms?) broke, attacked and almost killed by dogs, fell out of a 2nd story window, and got hit by a car, and finally, poisoned. He's alive, just retarded.

A body falling on a cat on a couch would not kill it.

holy shit.....

I like turtles.
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Shaddam IV

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#14

02-26-2005, 01:20 PM

Originally posted by DarkJedi

My cat had 2 front legs (arms?) broke, attacked and almost killed by dogs, fell out of a 2nd story window, and got hit by a car, and finally, poisoned. He's alive, just retarded.

A body falling on a cat on a couch would not kill it.

an ass 24" wide with 280 pounds on top of it, falling down on a wood supported futon. yes. dead. it limped around dragging it's head screaming, laid down in the kitchen and blood came out of it's mouth...
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Sly

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#15

02-26-2005, 01:20 PM

I bet his friends name is Ted.

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#16

02-26-2005, 01:21 PM

good luck....

My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business.
He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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Shaddam IV

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#17

02-26-2005, 01:21 PM

Originally posted by Cylon

You told her the truth? You should have tossed it in the middle of the street and said it was hit by a car.

fuck, im an idiot.

what about getting her a new kitten idea ?

need some advice. do i get it now so she has something fuzzy to play with and shower with attention or is there a mourning period?

by the way, it cost $68 to dispose of the cat.
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#18

02-26-2005, 01:23 PM

ha ha sad, but it is funny

FreeOnes
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DarkJedi

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#19

02-26-2005, 01:24 PM

Originally posted by Shaddam IV

an ass 24" wide with 280 pounds on top of it, falling down on a wood supported futon. yes. dead. it limped around dragging it's head screaming, laid down in the kitchen and blood came out of it's mouth...

Hmmm... yes, after seeing the guys bare ass from behind so many time as you have, i'm sure you're right on the money when you say it was a 24 inch ass.

By the way, how big was his dick?
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#20

02-26-2005, 01:26 PM

Originally posted by FredIsMe

dont let a woman come between friends.

Are you dumb? If anything in this situation it is the friends coming between him and his woman.

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#21

02-26-2005, 01:28 PM

Originally posted by polish_aristocrat

i buy massive xxx dating traffic.
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sonofsam

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#22

02-26-2005, 01:29 PM

Originally posted by Shaddam IV

an ass 24" wide with 280 pounds on top of it, falling down on a wood supported futon. yes. dead. it limped around dragging it's head screaming, laid down in the kitchen and blood came out of it's mouth...

ewwww that painted a picture in my head....

I like turtles.
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#23

02-26-2005, 01:29 PM

this calls for the bullshit detector.

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#24

02-26-2005, 01:31 PM

you can always turn gay
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#25

02-26-2005, 01:31 PM

take her to the store of animal shelter and get a new one. If you get a kitten it will be cool as it grew up with you and when everyone starts drinking it will find a place to hide.
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#26

02-26-2005, 01:34 PM

Ahh leave it to friends to kill pussy for you
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FredIsMe

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#27

02-26-2005, 01:36 PM

Originally posted by Shortbread

Are you dumb? If anything in this situation it is the friends coming between him and his woman.

it was an accident
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#28

02-26-2005, 01:36 PM

hahahahah great story.
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#29

02-26-2005, 01:37 PM

Poor cat had a ruptured liver.
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Rorschach

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#30

02-26-2005, 01:37 PM

WHAT A LOAD OF FUCKING BULLSHIT
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#31

02-26-2005, 02:02 PM

Originally posted by Shortbread

Are you dumb? If anything in this situation it is the friends coming between him and his woman.

BROs BEFORE HOs

Never confuse it.

Jim
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hova

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#32

02-26-2005, 02:09 PM

You are very funny

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#33

02-26-2005, 02:19 PM

It sounds like its little neck was broke... How sick. Sorry to say this but getting her a new cat or trying to convince her it was an accident will not help at all... To her this represents all her accusations of your friends being a bunch of drunk idiots.

So even though it was an accident you better be kissing some major ass and apologizing for getting out of control. Don't blame it on the alcohol either. The alcohol while sitting in the bottle didn't do anything to her cat...

Man you're in deep deep shit. Her parents are going to think of this everytime they hear your name or look at you.
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#34

02-26-2005, 02:27 PM

Assuming this isn't bullshit, you're an idiot for telling the truth. If you wanted to continue having a relationship with this girl, you should have gotten rid of the body and acted surprised when she noticed it was missing, as if it ran away when someone opened the door. Yes I'm an asshole, but hey, I've done an incredible amount of stupid things in my day and I remain married, against all odds.

Also, that way she'd at least have a glimmer of hope that the cat is still alive somewhere.
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#35

02-26-2005, 02:28 PM

Maybe you are drunks?

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#36

02-26-2005, 02:29 PM

dude problem solved.. just get her a new cat... a better one.... with better skills...

lol jk

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The Other Sweetie

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#37

02-26-2005, 02:35 PM

I agree with Rich. Sometimes the truth is better left unsaid. Not that I'm an advocate of lying, but in this case I think you're a dumbass for telling the truth. Woulda been better off telling her that the cat got outside when your friends were coming in the house. A lot less painful all around thinking the cat ran away vs. some drunk fuck squishing it like a pancake.

Now her parents are going to think you're a sick freak and forever hate your guts and she'll always remember you as "that fucken asshole ex-boyfriend who killed my cat."

I wonder how she'll react when you offer to get her a new cat. Will probably piss her off reminding her what you (your friend) did to her old cat.
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#38

02-26-2005, 02:37 PM

Originally posted by Rich

Assuming this isn't bullshit, you're an idiot for telling the truth. If you wanted to continue having a relationship with this girl, you should have gotten rid of the body and acted surprised when she noticed it was missing, as if it ran away when someone opened the door. Yes I'm an asshole, but hey, I've done an incredible amount of stupid things in my day and I remain married, against all odds.

Also, that way she'd at least have a glimmer of hope that the cat is still alive somewhere.

so true

i hope your wife doesnt read gfy though.

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#39

02-26-2005, 02:40 PM

Originally posted by Sly

I bet his friends name is Ted.

I don't think many people will get that. May have to refresh their memories
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#40

02-26-2005, 02:41 PM

oh man...that's fucked up...and funny

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gh0st

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#41

02-26-2005, 02:45 PM

Am I the only one who didn't think this was funny at all?
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#42

02-26-2005, 02:49 PM

poor cat all you can do is say sorry if she wants to leave you shes going too have some dignity

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#43

02-26-2005, 02:49 PM

Originally posted by DarkJedi

My cat had 2 front legs (arms?) broke, attacked and almost killed by dogs, fell out of a 2nd story window, and got hit by a car, and finally, poisoned. He's alive, just retarded.

A body falling on a cat on a couch would not kill it.

he's got 4 more lives left
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#44

02-26-2005, 02:50 PM

That was stupid man, sucks to be you..

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#45

02-26-2005, 02:50 PM
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#46

02-26-2005, 02:50 PM

Originally posted by jimb

BROs BEFORE HOs

Never confuse it.

Jim

lol, I know what you are saying but this post make you seem really homosexual
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#47

02-26-2005, 02:51 PM
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#48

02-26-2005, 02:52 PM
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#49

02-26-2005, 02:52 PM

Pussy killing friends!

Think about a new life, that g/f is gone. Time to look for another. Don't even waste the time trying to make up. Say you're sorry, offer to buy a new cat of her choice and move on. In otherwords break up with her. Tell her that she deserves better than you (might be true?) and you won't be bothering her anymore and that it is only fair that you pay for a new pet.

If she calls you then you'd have a lot less shit to deal with. After that don't beat your selfup by talking and talking about it. Let the subject drop. Make sure your friends know that too.
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#50

02-26-2005, 02:52 PM
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