If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
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Most of us go to our grave with our music still inside of us.Comment
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If Wall-Mart is lowering prices every day, how come nothing is free yet?Comment
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You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.Comment
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Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.Comment
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Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened.Comment
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We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colours .... but they all have to learn to live in the same box.Comment
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Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.Comment
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A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.Comment
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Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.Comment
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If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out.Comment
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Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.Comment
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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a mechanic.Comment
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Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.Comment
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If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.Comment
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My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.Comment
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Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.Comment
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It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.Comment
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For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.Comment
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If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.Comment
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Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.Comment
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A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.Comment
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Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.Comment
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Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.Comment
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No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes.Comment
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A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.Comment
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Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.Comment
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Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.Comment
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Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.Comment
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There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.Comment
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Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.Comment
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By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.Comment
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Thou shall not weigh more than thy refrigerator.Comment
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Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.Comment
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Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Relationships appear closer than they are.Comment
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I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.Comment
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I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.Comment
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I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.Comment
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If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.Comment
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