Peter Griffin: Uh... my name is...
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Lois: ... ing eyes out. Cookies are done. Who wants chocolate chip?Comment
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Peter Griffin: Hey, I'll be right back. I've got to go take a wicked yes.Comment
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Stewie Griffin: Yes. How delightful it will be. A pubescent herd of gabby wretches prattling on about boys and music and jellybeans and stickers.Comment
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Peter Griffin: This party couldn't be better if Jesus was here.Comment
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Diet Institute Worker: Oh sorry.Comment
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Peter Griffin: Aw, that's nothing. He does the same thing at home, but with Velveeta and cockroaches. And if ya turn on the lights really fast, they'll slam him right into the fridge.Comment
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Stewie Griffin: 867-5309, yes that's it. Wait that's not it, damn you Tommy Two-Tone. Huh, only one thing to do 111-1111, Lois? Damn. 111-1112 Lois? DAMN. 111-1113...Comment
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[Brian and Peter are putting a crib together]Comment
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Lois Griffin: What's going on?Comment
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[gunshots are heard following by a "body drop" sound effect]Comment
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Peter Griffin: That I wouldn't drink at the stag party.Comment
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Peter Griffin: Holy Crap! You can talk!Comment
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Lois Griffin: I'll be just like Hillary Clinton, only you know, without the penis.Comment
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Chris Griffin: I love you She Hulk.Comment
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[holds up a leaf to Chris]Comment
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Peter Griffin: No, he's actually a guy, Quagmire.Comment
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Richie: Mom, uh, I really like Potsy.Comment
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Brian Griffin: My therapist thinks I'm in love.Comment
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Peter Griffin: Oh my god. It's the Children of the Corn.Comment
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[wiggles his tongue like a snake]Comment
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Peter Griffin: Hey, where's my VCR?Comment
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Drug Buyer: No, no, no, you don't see the money 'till I see the stuff.Comment
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Lois Griffin: Top drawer.Comment
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Chris Griffin: Thanks.Comment
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Stewie: What the deuce?Comment
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[throws his hand up in a Hitler salute]Comment
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Cleveland: We think it was some time between the Tonight Show and the Today Show.Comment
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Chris Griffin: I wanna get Barbara a really nice gift, What kind of gifts have boys gotten for you Meg?Comment
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Peter Griffin: You gonna eat that stapler?Comment
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Peter Griffin: The South? Isn't that where the black people are really lazy, and the white people are equally as lazy, but they're mad at the black people for being so lazy?Comment
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Peter Griffin: Rea... Really?Comment
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Tom Tucker: So, Dustin, it's been a while. I gotta say, you look great.Comment
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Peter Griffin: I'll take it, but I won't pay a cent over $60.Comment
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Chris Griffin: Don't censor me.Comment
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Al Gore: Dick ArmyComment
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Brian Griffin: Anus.Comment
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Network executive: Mr. Griffin, you can't eat a...Comment
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[oven dings]Comment
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Janet: Hi. Cookie?Comment
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[Stewie has run away and Brian discovers this note]Comment
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Stewie Griffin: I don't have toComment
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Peter Griffin: Wanna split it?Comment
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Glen Quagmire: Just checkin'.Comment
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[he sees a Griffin fly by]Comment
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[she maces him]Comment
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Glen Quagmire: The Griffins. Bunch of card-carrying Commies if you ask me. All right.Comment
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[keeps laughing]Comment
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Peter Griffin: You know my great-great-grandfather Angus Griffin invented the game.Comment
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[wiggles his tongue like a snake]Comment
Comment