Brian came home from the pub late one Friday evening fully drunk, and
crept into bed beside his sleeping wife. He gave her a kiss on the
cheek and promptly fell fast asleep.
When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed
wearing a long flowing white robe.
"Who the hell are you?" demanded Brian, "and what are you doing in my
bedroom?"
The man answered "I'm St Peter - and this isn't your bedroom."
Brian was stunned "You mean I'm dead? That can't be!!! I have so much
to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family.... please, please,
you've got to send me back straight away!"
St Peter replied "Yes you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We
can only send you back as a dog or a hen."
Brian was devasted, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house,
he asked to be sent back as a hen.
A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around
pecking the ground.
"This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strange feeling
welling up inside him.
The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen, how
are you enjoying your first day here?"
"It's not so bad" replies Brian, "but I have this strange feeling inside
like I'm about to explode".
"You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never
laid an egg before".
"Never" replies Brian. "Well just relax and let it happen" said the
rooster.
And so he did... and after a few uncomfortable seconds, an egg pops out
from under his tail.
An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the
better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time.
When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming
and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that
ever happened to him... ever!!!
The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he
felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife
shouting.
"Brian, wake the fuck up you drunken bastard, you're shitting the bed!"
crept into bed beside his sleeping wife. He gave her a kiss on the
cheek and promptly fell fast asleep.
When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed
wearing a long flowing white robe.
"Who the hell are you?" demanded Brian, "and what are you doing in my
bedroom?"
The man answered "I'm St Peter - and this isn't your bedroom."
Brian was stunned "You mean I'm dead? That can't be!!! I have so much
to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family.... please, please,
you've got to send me back straight away!"
St Peter replied "Yes you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We
can only send you back as a dog or a hen."
Brian was devasted, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house,
he asked to be sent back as a hen.
A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around
pecking the ground.
"This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strange feeling
welling up inside him.
The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen, how
are you enjoying your first day here?"
"It's not so bad" replies Brian, "but I have this strange feeling inside
like I'm about to explode".
"You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never
laid an egg before".
"Never" replies Brian. "Well just relax and let it happen" said the
rooster.
And so he did... and after a few uncomfortable seconds, an egg pops out
from under his tail.
An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the
better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time.
When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming
and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that
ever happened to him... ever!!!
The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he
felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife
shouting.
"Brian, wake the fuck up you drunken bastard, you're shitting the bed!"
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