One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed ....

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  • Art Del Gado
    Confirmed User
    • Nov 2003
    • 960

    #1

    One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed ....

    My gf sent me this joke .. i thought it was funny. Its a bit long but worth the reading. !


    One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said "WHAT????!!!

    What was that?!"

    So she says the words that every man on the planet dreads to hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
    She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to
    sleep.

    The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, unnamed dept. store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewelry dept. where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell
    you...she as so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.

    I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

    Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
    dear, let's go to the cashier". I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT???!!!"
    I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for awhile.. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
    And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added,"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

    Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either
    Art Del Gado
    ICQ: 616143
  • wdsguy
    Ryde or Die
    • Dec 2002
    • 19568

    #2
    HAHAHA damn thats freakin awesome

    Comment

    • Abyss_Vee
      Confirmed User
      • Sep 2003
      • 5208

      #3


      art u ass, where the hell u been

      Comment

      • doober
        Confirmed User
        • Jul 2003
        • 6984

        #4
        holy shit thats afucking good one

        Comment

        • WWC-Moe B.
          Confirmed User
          • Dec 2003
          • 2546

          #5
          man i just got married and you mean to tell me shit like this is going on???

          NICE
          Moe B.
          [email protected]
          ICQ - 286024627
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          Comment

          • Michael O
            More Cowbell
            • Jul 2001
            • 10607

            #6

            That was great
            Truth Teller

            Comment

            • bangman
              Confirmed User
              • Sep 2004
              • 5283

              #7

              That was great
              - David Hall
              ICQ: 312744199

              Comment

              • Nader
                Confirmed User
                • Dec 2003
                • 5086

                #8
                wow crazy

                Comment

                • reynold
                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                  • Oct 2002
                  • 51271

                  #9
                  nice move! good one! LOL!

                  Comment

                  • Spunky
                    I need a beer
                    • Jun 2002
                    • 133978

                    #10
                    Ha...good one

                    Comment

                    • BrainDead
                      So Fucking Banned
                      • Dec 2003
                      • 1536

                      #11
                      that's really funny man! thanks for sharing!

                      Comment

                      • WWC
                        #1 Adult Content Provider
                        • Jul 2003
                        • 11577

                        #12
                        hahaha now thats a real payback!
                        [email protected]
                        ICQ : 494-353-230
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                        " CONTENT PROVIDER OF THE YEAR! " ~ 2007 , 2008 & 2009 XBIZ AWARDS WINNER!

                        Comment

                        • Plan9
                          Confirmed User
                          • Jul 2003
                          • 1801

                          #13
                          haha thats fucking hilarious

                          Comment

                          • digifan
                            The Profiler
                            • Oct 2002
                            • 14618

                            #14
                            Awesome joke
                            [email protected]
                            Webair Rocks

                            Comment

                            • ocho-ocho
                              Confirmed User
                              • Apr 2004
                              • 1769

                              #15
                              that was a GREAT one
                              ____________________________
                              under construction

                              Comment

                              • Art Del Gado
                                Confirmed User
                                • Nov 2003
                                • 960

                                #16


                                I'm glad you guys like it ... i hit the floor when i read it...
                                Art Del Gado
                                ICQ: 616143

                                Comment

                                • jawanda
                                  Confirmed User
                                  • Feb 2003
                                  • 6040

                                  #17
                                  that is fucking awesome


                                  Comment

                                  • Havoc_on_fire
                                    Registered User
                                    • Jun 2004
                                    • 13

                                    #18
                                    LMAO... Those are the things that we all wish we could think of when our significant other cuts us off. Thanks for sharing... That was hillarious...

                                    Comment

                                    • Manowar
                                      jellyfish  
                                      • Dec 2003
                                      • 71528

                                      #19

                                      Comment

                                      • dready
                                        Confirmed User
                                        • Oct 2002
                                        • 5247

                                        #20

                                        Holy fuck that's a good one!
                                        ICQ: 91139591

                                        Comment

                                        • .:St Ides:.
                                          Confirmed User
                                          • Jul 2004
                                          • 4857

                                          #21
                                          i don't get it

                                          Comment

                                          • shermo

                                            #22
                                            Hahahahahah! That's pretty fuckng hillarious! Great contrast

                                            Comment

                                            • Matt M
                                              Confirmed User
                                              • Nov 2002
                                              • 738

                                              #23
                                              That was the best read i have had all day!!
                                              No Thanks, I have my own......
                                              ICQ: 156837862

                                              Comment

                                              • Tricksy
                                                Confirmed User
                                                • Aug 2004
                                                • 2601

                                                #24
                                                It's funny.....NICE!!!


                                                Real-Bucks.com - Real Bucks for Real Webmasters.

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                                                • Fucksakes
                                                  Shit... Fuck! What the Hell?
                                                  • Dec 2003
                                                  • 7567

                                                  #25
                                                  I need to try that one day.

                                                  Comment

                                                  • mahoney
                                                    Confirmed User
                                                    • Nov 2003
                                                    • 5318

                                                    #26
                                                    Vegassexparty.com

                                                    Comment

                                                    • TheMob
                                                      Confirmed User
                                                      • Jan 2003
                                                      • 8584

                                                      #27
                                                      that is really funny.. good one

                                                      Comment

                                                      • emthree
                                                        Dialer Kingpin
                                                        • Jun 2003
                                                        • 10816

                                                        #28
                                                        lol

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