Fuck you if you can't take a joke

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  • CDSmith
    Too lazy to set a custom title
    • May 2001
    • 51460
    #1

    Fuck you if you can't take a joke

    Gay Bob goes into the doctor's office and has some tests run.
    The doctor comes back and says "Bob, I'm not going to beat
    around the bush. You have AIDS."
    Bob is devastated. "Doc, what can I do?"
    "Eat 1 sausage, 1 head of cabbage, 20 unpeeled carrots
    drenched in hot sauce, 10 Jalapeno peppers, 40 walnuts, 40
    peanuts, 1/2 box of Raisin Bran, and top it off with a gallon of
    prune juice."
    Bob asks, "Will that cure me, Doc?"
    Doc says, "No, but it should leave you with a better understanding of what your ass is for."
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    Tags: None
    • Ice
      Confirmed User
      • Nov 2002
      • 26053
      #2
      OMG ok that was kinda funny
      icq 1904905

        Comment

        • CDSmith
          Too lazy to set a custom title
          • May 2001
          • 51460
          #3
          A teacher asks her class if anyone could use the word 'indefinitely' in
          a sentence. Little Johnny raises his hand at the back of the class.

          But the teacher knows he's a trouble maker and that he
          doesn't know the answer, so she calls on Jim.

          Jim replies, "Due to the weather, school was cancelled indefinitely."

          "Good" the teacher replies. "What about you Jenny?"

          Jenny says, "Since the bus broke down, transportation
          has been stopped indefinitely."

          The teacher then says that the sentence was too much
          like the other one, and asks if anyone can use it in a different way.

          So there's Little Johnny waving his hand again. And the
          teacher thinks... (Maybe he really does know the answer ,
          so she calls on him. Johnny stands up and says,
          "As I felt my balls slap against her ass, I knew that I was
          in definitely"
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            Comment

            • mardigras
              Bon temps!
              • Feb 2003
              • 14194
              #4
              Booo first one, 2nd one is cute
              .

                Comment

                • CDSmith
                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                  • May 2001
                  • 51460
                  #5
                  Originally posted by mardigras
                  Booo first one,
                  Refer to thread title
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                    Comment

                    • CDSmith
                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                      • May 2001
                      • 51460
                      #6
                      A lady found out her dog could hardly hear, so she took it to the
                      veterinarian.

                      He found that the problem was hair in its ears, so he cleaned both ears,
                      and the dog could hear fine. The vet then proceeded to tell the lady
                      that if she wanted to keep this from reoccurring, she should go to the
                      store and get some "Nair" hair remover, and rub it in its ears once a
                      month.

                      The lady goes to the drugstore and gets some "Nair."

                      At the register, the druggist tells her: "If you're going to use this
                      under your arms, don't use deodorant for a few days."

                      The lady says, "I'm not using it under my arms."

                      The druggist says, "If you're using it on your legs, don't shave for
                      couple of days."

                      The lady says, "I'm not using it on my legs either; if you must know,
                      I'm using it on my Schnauzer."

                      The druggist says, "Stay off your bicycle for a week."
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                        Comment

                        • CDSmith
                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                          • May 2001
                          • 51460
                          #7
                          Four friends reunited at a party after thirty years. After a few laughs
                          and drinks, one of them left to visit the rest room. The others began to
                          talk about their kids and their successes.

                          The first man said, "I am really proud of my son; he is my pride and
                          joy. He started working at the bottom of a very successful company. He
                          studied economics and business administration, and he was soon promoted
                          and began to climb the corporate ladder, becoming the general manager.
                          Now he is the president of the company. He is so rich that he could
                          afford to give his best friend a top-of-the-line Mercedes Benz for his
                          birthday."

                          The second man said, "Wow, that's terrific! My son also is my pride and
                          joy, I am very proud of him. He started working at a travel agency for a
                          big airline. He went to flight school to become a pilot and also managed
                          to become a partner in the company where he now owns a majority of the
                          assets. He became so rich that he recently gave his best friend a brand
                          new jet for his birthday."

                          The third man said, "Well, well, congratulations! My son is also my
                          pride and the apple of my eye and he is also wealthy. He studied in the
                          best universities and became an engineer. He started his own
                          construction company and became quite successful and a multimillionaire.
                          He too gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend
                          for his birthday -- he gave him a 30,000 sq ft mansion built especially
                          for his friend."

                          The three friends congratulated each other mutually for the successes of
                          their sons. The fourth friend who had gone to the restroom returned and
                          asked, "What is going on -- what are all the congratulations for?"

                          One of the three explained, "We were talking about the mutual pride we
                          feel for the successes of our sons." And then he asked, "What about your
                          son?"

                          The fourth man replied, "My son is gay and he makes a living dancing as
                          a stripper at a nightclub."

                          The three friends commiserated, "What a shame -- that must
                          be horrible for you. What disappointment you must feel."

                          The fourth man replied, "Oh no, I am not ashamed. Not at all. He is my
                          son and I love him well. He is my pride and joy, and he is very
                          fortunate, too. Did you know that his birthday just passed and the other
                          day he received a brand new jet, a beautiful 30,000 sq ft mansion, and a
                          top-of-the-line Mercedes Benz from his three boyfriends."








                          muhahahaaa
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                            Comment

                            • Aquarius
                              Confirmed User
                              • May 2004
                              • 4754
                              #8
                              I liked the second one most.

                                Comment

                                • cool1
                                  sex is good
                                  • Sep 2001
                                  • 24939
                                  #9
                                  Those were good CD

                                    Comment

                                    • CDSmith
                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                      • May 2001
                                      • 51460
                                      #10
                                      Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and values.
                                      Stu said, "I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?"
                                      Leroy replied, "I'm not sure, What was her maiden name.
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                                        Comment

                                        • Mike Okitch
                                          Confirmed User
                                          • May 2004
                                          • 4126
                                          #11
                                          SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, then you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60.

                                            Comment

                                            • CDSmith
                                              Too lazy to set a custom title
                                              • May 2001
                                              • 51460
                                              #12
                                              "Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the divorce court
                                              Judge said, "And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week,"
                                              "That's very fair, your honor," the husband said. "And every now and then I'll
                                              try to send her a few bucks myself,"
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                                                Comment

                                                • Rankings
                                                  Adult SEO
                                                  • Jan 2004
                                                  • 10633
                                                  #13
                                                  Originally posted by CDSmith
                                                  "Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the divorce court
                                                  Judge said, "And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week,"
                                                  "That's very fair, your honor," the husband said. "And every now and then I'll
                                                  try to send her a few bucks myself,"
                                                  haha... I laughed out loud
                                                  Your leader for Adult SEO Services

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                                                    Comment

                                                    • BMI Lace
                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                      • Mar 2004
                                                      • 16116
                                                      #14
                                                      Originally posted by CDSmith

                                                      muhahahaaa

                                                      HAHAHAHAHH ROFL !@#@#?
                                                      Your Paysite Partner
                                                      Strength In Numbers!
                                                      StickyDollars | RadicalCash | KennysPennies | HomegrownCash

                                                        Comment

                                                        • Elli
                                                          Reach for those stars!
                                                          • Apr 2003
                                                          • 17991
                                                          #15
                                                          Those are very good I'd only heard one of them before!

                                                          A guy gets shipwrecked.

                                                          When he wakes up, he's on a beach.

                                                          The sand is purple. He can't believe it.

                                                          The sky is purple.

                                                          He walks around a bit and sees that there is purple grass, purple birds
                                                          and purple fruit on the purple trees.

                                                          He's shocked when he finds that his skin is starting to turn purple too.

                                                          "Oh no!!" he says, "I think I've been marooned!!"
                                                          email: [email protected]

                                                            Comment

                                                            • cool1
                                                              sex is good
                                                              • Sep 2001
                                                              • 24939
                                                              #16
                                                              Originally posted by Mike Okitch

                                                              little Johnny jokes with pictures cool

                                                                Comment

                                                                • mardigras
                                                                  Bon temps!
                                                                  • Feb 2003
                                                                  • 14194
                                                                  #17
                                                                  Originally posted by CDSmith
                                                                  Refer to thread title
                                                                  LOL, I can take the joke, it just struck me as silly rather than funny
                                                                  .

                                                                    Comment

                                                                    • CDSmith
                                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                      • May 2001
                                                                      • 51460
                                                                      #18
                                                                      Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder
                                                                      1. All the DNA is the same.
                                                                      2. There are no dental records.
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                                                                        Comment

                                                                        • mardigras
                                                                          Bon temps!
                                                                          • Feb 2003
                                                                          • 14194
                                                                          #19
                                                                          Originally posted by CDSmith
                                                                          Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and values.
                                                                          Stu said, "I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?"
                                                                          Leroy replied, "I'm not sure, What was her maiden name.
                                                                          Now that makes me laugh
                                                                          .

                                                                            Comment

                                                                            • Spunky
                                                                              I need a beer
                                                                              • Jun 2002
                                                                              • 133987
                                                                              #20
                                                                              Heh heh

                                                                                Comment

                                                                                • CDSmith
                                                                                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                  • May 2001
                                                                                  • 51460
                                                                                  #21
                                                                                  A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell me how long it'll
                                                                                  take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?"
                                                                                  The agent replies, "Just a minute..."
                                                                                  "Thank you," the blonde said and hung up.
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                                                                                    • CDSmith
                                                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                      • May 2001
                                                                                      • 51460
                                                                                      #22
                                                                                      Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.
                                                                                      "How was he killed?" asked one detective.
                                                                                      "With a golf gun," the other detective replied.
                                                                                      "A golf gun?! What the hell is a golf gun?"
                                                                                      "I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan."
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                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                        • CDSmith
                                                                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                          • May 2001
                                                                                          • 51460
                                                                                          #23
                                                                                          THE SMARTASS HUSBAND

                                                                                          While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display
                                                                                          of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since
                                                                                          I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's
                                                                                          advice. "What do you think?" I asked. "Should I get a bikini or an
                                                                                          all-in-one?"
                                                                                          "Better get a bikini," he replied. "You'd never get it all in one."
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                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                            • CDSmith
                                                                                              Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                              • May 2001
                                                                                              • 51460
                                                                                              #24
                                                                                              Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter and beeped the
                                                                                              horn by mistake. She turned and looked at him for an explanation. He
                                                                                              said, I did that by accident."
                                                                                              She replied, "I know that, Grandpa."
                                                                                              He replied, "How did you know?"
                                                                                              She said, "Because you didn't say "asshole" afterwards.
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                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                • CDSmith
                                                                                                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                  • May 2001
                                                                                                  • 51460
                                                                                                  #25
                                                                                                  A young woman, wearing a tight leather mini-skirt with
                                                                                                  matching tight leather boots and jacket, was waiting
                                                                                                  for the city bus.

                                                                                                  When the young woman stepped up to board the bus,
                                                                                                  she quickly realized that her skirt was too tight. The embarrassed
                                                                                                  young woman reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little. She
                                                                                                  hoped this would give her enough slack to climb the stairs onto the bus.
                                                                                                  Much to her chagrin, though, that didn't help.

                                                                                                  A big Texan, who was in line behind the embarrassed,
                                                                                                  young woman, gently lifted her from the waist and
                                                                                                  helped her onto the bus.

                                                                                                  As expected, the young woman went ballistic, and turned
                                                                                                  on the would-be hero, screeching at him, "How dare you
                                                                                                  touch me! I don't even know who you are!"

                                                                                                  The big Texan drawled, "Well ma'am, normally I would agree
                                                                                                  with you, but since you were unzippin' my fly, I kinda
                                                                                                  figured that we was friends!"
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                                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                                    • maxdaname
                                                                                                      Confirmed User
                                                                                                      • Oct 2003
                                                                                                      • 5193
                                                                                                      #26
                                                                                                      Stop It You're Killing Me!

                                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                                        • DESIREbyDESIGN
                                                                                                          Confirmed User
                                                                                                          • May 2004
                                                                                                          • 239
                                                                                                          #27
                                                                                                          Originally posted by CDSmith
                                                                                                          Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder
                                                                                                          1. All the DNA is the same.
                                                                                                          2. There are no dental records.


                                                                                                          SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, then you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60.

                                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                                            • Pete
                                                                                                              Confirmed User
                                                                                                              • Jan 2001
                                                                                                              • 6617
                                                                                                              #28
                                                                                                              Now thats fuckin funny!
                                                                                                              Evoke Electronics

                                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                                • CDSmith
                                                                                                                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                  • May 2001
                                                                                                                  • 51460
                                                                                                                  #29
                                                                                                                  Japan recently sent the American people 50,000,000 cases of Viagra ...... They heard that our entire country can't get an election straight ...
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                                                                                                                    • CDSmith
                                                                                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                      • May 2001
                                                                                                                      • 51460
                                                                                                                      #30
                                                                                                                      My fellow Canuckleheads might appreciate this one....



                                                                                                                      BROKEN SNOWMOBILE

                                                                                                                      An Eskimo brought his snowmobile in for servicing. He told the mechanic that it wasn't running right. The mechanic took a look at the snowmobile , turned to the Eskimo and said, "It doesn't look too bad, but I think you've blown a seal."

                                                                                                                      ... The Eskimo looks puzzled for a minute, wipes off his face and says, "Nah...its just some ice in my mustache..."
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                                                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                                                        • BigG
                                                                                                                          So Fucking Banned
                                                                                                                          • Apr 2004
                                                                                                                          • 931
                                                                                                                          #31
                                                                                                                          A man walks into a doctor's office.

                                                                                                                          He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.

                                                                                                                          "What's the matter with me?" he asks the doctor.

                                                                                                                          The doctor replies, "You're not eating properly."

                                                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                                                            • CDSmith
                                                                                                                              Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                              • May 2001
                                                                                                                              • 51460
                                                                                                                              #32
                                                                                                                              A physician claims these are actual comments from his patients made
                                                                                                                              while he was performing colonoscopies: (scope tube up the pooper)

                                                                                                                              1. "Take it easy, Doc, you're boldly going where no man has gone
                                                                                                                              before."

                                                                                                                              2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

                                                                                                                              3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

                                                                                                                              4. "Oh boy, that was sphincterrific!"

                                                                                                                              5. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

                                                                                                                              6. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."

                                                                                                                              7. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"

                                                                                                                              8. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out. You do the
                                                                                                                              Hokey Pokey...."

                                                                                                                              9. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

                                                                                                                              10. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must aquit!"

                                                                                                                              11. "Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

                                                                                                                              12. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"

                                                                                                                              13. "Could you write me a note for my wife, saying that my head is not,
                                                                                                                              in fact, up there?"
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                                                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                                                • CDSmith
                                                                                                                                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                  • May 2001
                                                                                                                                  • 51460
                                                                                                                                  #33
                                                                                                                                  I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it...
                                                                                                                                  so I said "Implants?"
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                                                                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                                                                    • BRISK
                                                                                                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                      • Feb 2003
                                                                                                                                      • 12240
                                                                                                                                      #34
                                                                                                                                      Originally posted by CDSmith
                                                                                                                                      Gay Bob goes into the doctor's office and has some tests run.
                                                                                                                                      The doctor comes back and says "Bob, I'm not going to beat
                                                                                                                                      around the bush. You have AIDS."
                                                                                                                                      Bob is devastated. "Doc, what can I do?"
                                                                                                                                      "Eat 1 sausage, 1 head of cabbage, 20 unpeeled carrots
                                                                                                                                      drenched in hot sauce, 10 Jalapeno peppers, 40 walnuts, 40
                                                                                                                                      peanuts, 1/2 box of Raisin Bran, and top it off with a gallon of
                                                                                                                                      prune juice."
                                                                                                                                      Bob asks, "Will that cure me, Doc?"
                                                                                                                                      Doc says, "No, but it should leave you with a better understanding of what your ass is for."
                                                                                                                                      I post on GFY so that when people ask me what I do,
                                                                                                                                      I can tell them that I work with the mentally retarded.

                                                                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                                                                        • CDSmith
                                                                                                                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                          • May 2001
                                                                                                                                          • 51460
                                                                                                                                          #35
                                                                                                                                          How do you know if a woman used a vibrator while she was pregnant?


                                                                                                                                          The kid stutters.
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                                                                                                                                            • BigG
                                                                                                                                              So Fucking Banned
                                                                                                                                              • Apr 2004
                                                                                                                                              • 931
                                                                                                                                              #36
                                                                                                                                              Originally posted by CDSmith
                                                                                                                                              How do you know if a woman used a vibrator while she was pregnant?


                                                                                                                                              The kid stutters.


                                                                                                                                              I can actually hear the ?rim shot? as I read each of these jokes!

                                                                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                                                                • Doctor Dre
                                                                                                                                                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                  • Jan 2001
                                                                                                                                                  • 51692
                                                                                                                                                  #37
                                                                                                                                                  ROFL ... owange
                                                                                                                                                  Originally posted by rayadp05
                                                                                                                                                  I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?

                                                                                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                                                                                    • CDSmith
                                                                                                                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                      • May 2001
                                                                                                                                                      • 51460
                                                                                                                                                      #38
                                                                                                                                                      It was also reported today that at a White House staff meeting last week
                                                                                                                                                      there was a long discussion about the health of Vice President Cheney
                                                                                                                                                      and his angina problem. President Bush interrupted and stated
                                                                                                                                                      emphatically that "Men do not have anginas." The President was
                                                                                                                                                      especially perplexed when a staffer said that Cheney has "acute angina."
                                                                                                                                                      Clinton would have asked him for a date because Hillary's angina is old
                                                                                                                                                      and damn ugly.
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                                                                                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                                                                                        • Doctor Dre
                                                                                                                                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                          • Jan 2001
                                                                                                                                                          • 51692
                                                                                                                                                          #39
                                                                                                                                                          Originally posted by CDSmith
                                                                                                                                                          A teacher asks her class if anyone could use the word 'indefinitely' in
                                                                                                                                                          a sentence. Little Johnny raises his hand at the back of the class.

                                                                                                                                                          But the teacher knows he's a trouble maker and that he
                                                                                                                                                          doesn't know the answer, so she calls on Jim.

                                                                                                                                                          Jim replies, "Due to the weather, school was cancelled indefinitely."

                                                                                                                                                          "Good" the teacher replies. "What about you Jenny?"

                                                                                                                                                          Jenny says, "Since the bus broke down, transportation
                                                                                                                                                          has been stopped indefinitely."

                                                                                                                                                          The teacher then says that the sentence was too much
                                                                                                                                                          like the other one, and asks if anyone can use it in a different way.

                                                                                                                                                          So there's Little Johnny waving his hand again. And the
                                                                                                                                                          teacher thinks... (Maybe he really does know the answer ,
                                                                                                                                                          so she calls on him. Johnny stands up and says,
                                                                                                                                                          "As I felt my balls slap against her ass, I knew that I was
                                                                                                                                                          in definitely"
                                                                                                                                                          ZzZzZ ... that would be something a 1st grade teacher would ask
                                                                                                                                                          Originally posted by rayadp05
                                                                                                                                                          I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?

                                                                                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                                                                                            • Doctor Dre
                                                                                                                                                              Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                              • Jan 2001
                                                                                                                                                              • 51692
                                                                                                                                                              #40
                                                                                                                                                              Originally posted by CDSmith
                                                                                                                                                              Four friends reunited at a party after thirty years. After a few laughs
                                                                                                                                                              and drinks, one of them left to visit the rest room. The others began to
                                                                                                                                                              talk about their kids and their successes.

                                                                                                                                                              The first man said, "I am really proud of my son; he is my pride and
                                                                                                                                                              joy. He started working at the bottom of a very successful company. He
                                                                                                                                                              studied economics and business administration, and he was soon promoted
                                                                                                                                                              and began to climb the corporate ladder, becoming the general manager.
                                                                                                                                                              Now he is the president of the company. He is so rich that he could
                                                                                                                                                              afford to give his best friend a top-of-the-line Mercedes Benz for his
                                                                                                                                                              birthday."

                                                                                                                                                              The second man said, "Wow, that's terrific! My son also is my pride and
                                                                                                                                                              joy, I am very proud of him. He started working at a travel agency for a
                                                                                                                                                              big airline. He went to flight school to become a pilot and also managed
                                                                                                                                                              to become a partner in the company where he now owns a majority of the
                                                                                                                                                              assets. He became so rich that he recently gave his best friend a brand
                                                                                                                                                              new jet for his birthday."

                                                                                                                                                              The third man said, "Well, well, congratulations! My son is also my
                                                                                                                                                              pride and the apple of my eye and he is also wealthy. He studied in the
                                                                                                                                                              best universities and became an engineer. He started his own
                                                                                                                                                              construction company and became quite successful and a multimillionaire.
                                                                                                                                                              He too gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend
                                                                                                                                                              for his birthday -- he gave him a 30,000 sq ft mansion built especially
                                                                                                                                                              for his friend."

                                                                                                                                                              The three friends congratulated each other mutually for the successes of
                                                                                                                                                              their sons. The fourth friend who had gone to the restroom returned and
                                                                                                                                                              asked, "What is going on -- what are all the congratulations for?"

                                                                                                                                                              One of the three explained, "We were talking about the mutual pride we
                                                                                                                                                              feel for the successes of our sons." And then he asked, "What about your
                                                                                                                                                              son?"

                                                                                                                                                              The fourth man replied, "My son is gay and he makes a living dancing as
                                                                                                                                                              a stripper at a nightclub."

                                                                                                                                                              The three friends commiserated, "What a shame -- that must
                                                                                                                                                              be horrible for you. What disappointment you must feel."

                                                                                                                                                              The fourth man replied, "Oh no, I am not ashamed. Not at all. He is my
                                                                                                                                                              son and I love him well. He is my pride and joy, and he is very
                                                                                                                                                              fortunate, too. Did you know that his birthday just passed and the other
                                                                                                                                                              day he received a brand new jet, a beautiful 30,000 sq ft mansion, and a
                                                                                                                                                              top-of-the-line Mercedes Benz from his three boyfriends."








                                                                                                                                                              muhahahaaa
                                                                                                                                                              Predictable ... but I didn't predict it ... great joke . Where did you get it from ?
                                                                                                                                                              Originally posted by rayadp05
                                                                                                                                                              I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?

                                                                                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                                                                                • CDSmith
                                                                                                                                                                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                                  • May 2001
                                                                                                                                                                  • 51460
                                                                                                                                                                  #41
                                                                                                                                                                  Originally posted by Doctor Dre
                                                                                                                                                                  great joke . Where did you get it from ?
                                                                                                                                                                  I'm not at liberty to say.
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                                                                                                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                                                                                                    • Doctor Dre
                                                                                                                                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                                      • Jan 2001
                                                                                                                                                                      • 51692
                                                                                                                                                                      #42
                                                                                                                                                                      Originally posted by CDSmith
                                                                                                                                                                      A young woman, wearing a tight leather mini-skirt with
                                                                                                                                                                      matching tight leather boots and jacket, was waiting
                                                                                                                                                                      for the city bus.

                                                                                                                                                                      When the young woman stepped up to board the bus,
                                                                                                                                                                      she quickly realized that her skirt was too tight. The embarrassed
                                                                                                                                                                      young woman reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little. She
                                                                                                                                                                      hoped this would give her enough slack to climb the stairs onto the bus.
                                                                                                                                                                      Much to her chagrin, though, that didn't help.

                                                                                                                                                                      A big Texan, who was in line behind the embarrassed,
                                                                                                                                                                      young woman, gently lifted her from the waist and
                                                                                                                                                                      helped her onto the bus.

                                                                                                                                                                      As expected, the young woman went ballistic, and turned
                                                                                                                                                                      on the would-be hero, screeching at him, "How dare you
                                                                                                                                                                      touch me! I don't even know who you are!"

                                                                                                                                                                      The big Texan drawled, "Well ma'am, normally I would agree
                                                                                                                                                                      with you, but since you were unzippin' my fly, I kinda
                                                                                                                                                                      figured that we was friends!"
                                                                                                                                                                      old
                                                                                                                                                                      Originally posted by rayadp05
                                                                                                                                                                      I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?

                                                                                                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                                                                                                        • CDSmith
                                                                                                                                                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                                          • May 2001
                                                                                                                                                                          • 51460
                                                                                                                                                                          #43
                                                                                                                                                                          Fresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining
                                                                                                                                                                          to her husband that her breasts are too small. Instead of
                                                                                                                                                                          characteristically telling her it's not so, her husband
                                                                                                                                                                          uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.

                                                                                                                                                                          "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet
                                                                                                                                                                          paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."

                                                                                                                                                                          Willing to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and
                                                                                                                                                                          stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.

                                                                                                                                                                          "How long will it take? " she asks.
                                                                                                                                                                          They'll grow larger over a period of years" he replies.

                                                                                                                                                                          The wife stops. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper
                                                                                                                                                                          between my breasts over years will make them grow bigger"?

                                                                                                                                                                          Without missing a beat the husband says "Worked for your butt; didn't it?"
                                                                                                                                                                          Promote Wildmatch, ImLive, Sexier.com, and more!!

                                                                                                                                                                          ALWAYS THE HIGHEST PAYOUTS: Big Bux/ImLive SIGNUP ON NOW!!!
                                                                                                                                                                          Put some PUSSYCA$H in your pocket.                                                                                                                                                                           ICQ me at: 31024634

                                                                                                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                                                                                                            • CDSmith
                                                                                                                                                                              Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                                              • May 2001
                                                                                                                                                                              • 51460
                                                                                                                                                                              #44
                                                                                                                                                                              Originally posted by Doctor Dre
                                                                                                                                                                              old
                                                                                                                                                                              Tell a joke or die. Bitch.
                                                                                                                                                                              Promote Wildmatch, ImLive, Sexier.com, and more!!

                                                                                                                                                                              ALWAYS THE HIGHEST PAYOUTS: Big Bux/ImLive SIGNUP ON NOW!!!
                                                                                                                                                                              Put some PUSSYCA$H in your pocket.                                                                                                                                                                               ICQ me at: 31024634

                                                                                                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                                                                                                • Doctor Dre
                                                                                                                                                                                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                                                  • Jan 2001
                                                                                                                                                                                  • 51692
                                                                                                                                                                                  #45
                                                                                                                                                                                  Originally posted by CDSmith


                                                                                                                                                                                  13. "Could you write me a note for my wife, saying that my head is not,
                                                                                                                                                                                  in fact, up there?"
                                                                                                                                                                                  I would take that note
                                                                                                                                                                                  Originally posted by rayadp05
                                                                                                                                                                                  I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?

                                                                                                                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                                                                                                                    • CDSmith
                                                                                                                                                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                                                      • May 2001
                                                                                                                                                                                      • 51460
                                                                                                                                                                                      #46
                                                                                                                                                                                      A man goes to a shrink and says, "Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me.
                                                                                                                                                                                      Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, she
                                                                                                                                                                                      sleeps with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy. What do you think I
                                                                                                                                                                                      should do?"
                                                                                                                                                                                      "Relax," says the Doctor, "take a deep breath and calm down.
                                                                                                                                                                                      Now, tell me, where exactly is Larry's bar?"
                                                                                                                                                                                      Promote Wildmatch, ImLive, Sexier.com, and more!!

                                                                                                                                                                                      ALWAYS THE HIGHEST PAYOUTS: Big Bux/ImLive SIGNUP ON NOW!!!
                                                                                                                                                                                      Put some PUSSYCA$H in your pocket.                                                                                                                                                                                       ICQ me at: 31024634

                                                                                                                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                                                                                                                        • CDSmith
                                                                                                                                                                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                                                                          • May 2001
                                                                                                                                                                                          • 51460
                                                                                                                                                                                          #47
                                                                                                                                                                                          Hung Chow call his boss and says: "Hey, boss I not come work
                                                                                                                                                                                          today, I really sick. I got headache, stomach ache and my legs hurt, I not
                                                                                                                                                                                          come work."

                                                                                                                                                                                          The boss says: "You know Hung Chow I really need you today. When I feel
                                                                                                                                                                                          like this I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes me feel
                                                                                                                                                                                          better and I can go to work. You should try that."

                                                                                                                                                                                          Two hours later Hung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what you say and I feel
                                                                                                                                                                                          great, I be at work soon. You got nice house."
                                                                                                                                                                                          Promote Wildmatch, ImLive, Sexier.com, and more!!

                                                                                                                                                                                          ALWAYS THE HIGHEST PAYOUTS: Big Bux/ImLive SIGNUP ON NOW!!!
                                                                                                                                                                                          Put some PUSSYCA$H in your pocket.                                                                                                                                                                                           ICQ me at: 31024634

                                                                                                                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                                                                                                                            • pxxx
                                                                                                                                                                                              First African GFY Member
                                                                                                                                                                                              • Mar 2004
                                                                                                                                                                                              • 12114
                                                                                                                                                                                              #48

                                                                                                                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                                                                                                                • FlyingIguana
                                                                                                                                                                                                  aspiring banker
                                                                                                                                                                                                  • Mar 2002
                                                                                                                                                                                                  • 10870
                                                                                                                                                                                                  #49

                                                                                                                                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                                                                                                                                    • Firehorse
                                                                                                                                                                                                      Desire it and have it!!!
                                                                                                                                                                                                      • Apr 2002
                                                                                                                                                                                                      • 30767
                                                                                                                                                                                                      #50
                                                                                                                                                                                                      Thanks for the laugh, CD!
                                                                                                                                                                                                      MySweetEbony

                                                                                                                                                                                                        Comment

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