In light of all these political threads, I thought it would be neat to post this comparison of the two sports.
- Baseball is a nineteenth-century pastoral game.
- Football is a twentieth-century technological struggle.
- Baseball is played on a diamond, in a park. The baseball park!
- Football is played on a GRIDIRON, in a STADIUM, sometimes called SOLDIER FIELD or WAR MEMORIAL STADIUM.
- Baseball begins in the spring, the season of new life.
- Football begins in the fall, when everything is dying.
- In baseball you wear a cap.
- In football you wear a helmet
- Baseball is concerned with ups. "Who's up? Are you up? I'm not up! He's up!"
- Football is concerned with downs. "What down is it?
- In baseball you make an error.
- In football you recieve a penalty.
- In baseball the specialist comes in to relieve somebody.
- In football the specialist comes in to kick.
- Football has hitting, clipping, spearing, piling on, personal fouls, late hitting, and unnecessary roughness.
- Baseball has the sacrifice.
- In baseball if it rains, we don't go out to play. "I can't go out! It's raining out!"
- Football is played in any kind of weather: Rain, snow, sleet, hail, fog...can't see the game, don't know if there is a game going on; mud on the field...can't read the uniforms, can't read the yard markers, the struggle will continue!
- Baseball has the seventh-inning stretch.
- Football has the two-minute warning
- Baseball has no time limit: "We don't know when it's gonna end!"
- Football is rigidly timed, and it will end "even if we have to go to sudden death."
- In baseball, during the game, in the stands, there's kind of a picnic feeling. Emotions may run high or low, but there's not that much unpleasantness.
- In football, during the game in the stands, you can be sure that at least twenty-seven times you were perfectly capable of taking the life of a fellow human being
- In football, the object is for the quarterback, otherwise known as the field general, to be on target with his aerial assault, riddling the defense by hitting his recievers with deadly accuracy in spite of the blitz, even if he has to use the shotgun. With short bullet passes and long bombs, he marches his troops into enemy territory, balancing this aerial assault with a sustained ground attack that punches holes in the forward wall of the enemy's defensive line.
- In baseball the object is to go home! And to be safe! "I hope I'll be safe at home!"