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same shit different spin lot of little things that cumulated into a clusterfuck of problems
im sick of my wife being immature and ungrateful - taking everything for granted
shes sick of my long hours and unwillingness to be ruled
my friends 21st birthday was last night so i went out with them - agreed that once the wife called i would bounce, which i did.
she was pissed i was at a bar, which is retarded because where the fuck else would i be. yelled at me in front of everyone, acting hard.
anyway straw that broke the camels back - shes not traditionally materialistic or anything and fairly low maintenence but she gives me absolutely no credit where credit is due - that shit is tiring.
Originally posted by footsex maybe if you seperate for a while things will change
agreed
ill give it some time but my wife is as hardheaded as me
i used to care a lot about her and its just gotten old
she doesnt understand all that ive given up for her and the shit i dont do because of our marriage but in contrast to the little things i still get away with seem to be all she sees
im fucking tired of walking the line i have a lot of dreams that shes never been supportive of - she reaps the rewards but doesnt acknowledge them
sadly my life becomes like eminems more every minute why god why hahahh
Originally posted by ytcracker same shit different spin lot of little things that cumulated into a clusterfuck of problems
im sick of my wife being immature and ungrateful - taking everything for granted
shes sick of my long hours and unwillingness to be ruled
my friends 21st birthday was last night so i went out with them - agreed that once the wife called i would bounce, which i did.
she was pissed i was at a bar, which is retarded because where the fuck else would i be. yelled at me in front of everyone, acting hard.
anyway straw that broke the camels back - shes not traditionally materialistic or anything and fairly low maintenence but she gives me absolutely no credit where credit is due - that shit is tiring.
Welcome to my world! My divorce pretrial is Oct. 7....We've been in the courts for a year and a half..it's costed me THOUSANDS of dollars that I could be spending on other things...The girl tried to use "porn" as an excuse...then she said I'm showing the kids porn, then she said I'm using the kids IN THE PORN! None of that worked, she's on supervised visitation and she lives in another state....I talked to her on the phone this morning to try to talk some sense into her...She knows she's fucked but she keeps trying to talk shit about some papers the judge filed in her favor that I don't know about yet..(right)...She disregards the five year civil protection order I have on her..she disregards the fact that the civil court has already ruled that she has committed domestic violence on ME...and she has disregarded that she has already been fined for contempt of court for disallowing me to see my children...
Then the bitch has the nerve to tell me to "Bring Some Kleenex" to the pretrial Tuesday....This is the same bitch who I will bury due to a video I have of her intoxicated and passed out around her infant and the family court has talked to all the schools and doctors and they will all state that she has been acting funny and not handling business....
I'm telling you right now...no matter how much it costs...GET RID OF HER NOW!!
This is the main reason I was begging for a plane ticket to vegas last January...the divorce shit was killing my pockets....Thanks Puremeds!
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Originally posted by BVF
I'm telling you right now...no matter how much it costs...GET RID OF HER NOW!!
This is the main reason I was begging for a plane ticket to vegas last January...the divorce shit was killing my pockets....Thanks Puremeds!
good looking out BVF
i would say to a degree that shes not twisted like that - her mother definately is so i wouldnt put it past her. its in her genes.
im sure we can both be civil about it but only time will tell. part of her hardheadness stems from this unbreakable pride issue she has - taking my money without "earning" it doesnt really appeal to her and therefore a certain degree of respect is in place.
i just finished putting her through school so she can get a career now doing whatever.
If your mind is made up...I mean 100% sure, then follow BVF's advice. Get a lawyer, do it now, and get the ball rolling. No sense letting a bad situation fester.
I've been there, I'm paying through the nose but I'm happier than I was so that's all that counts.
Originally posted by ytcracker same shit different spin lot of little things that cumulated into a clusterfuck of problems
im sick of my wife being immature and ungrateful - taking everything for granted
shes sick of my long hours and unwillingness to be ruled
my friends 21st birthday was last night so i went out with them - agreed that once the wife called i would bounce, which i did.
she was pissed i was at a bar, which is retarded because where the fuck else would i be. yelled at me in front of everyone, acting hard.
anyway straw that broke the camels back - shes not traditionally materialistic or anything and fairly low maintenence but she gives me absolutely no credit where credit is due - that shit is tiring.
Not to sound like a bitch, but I think that's the problem with a lot of new marriages today. People still want to do things that single people do. If I had a husband, I'd never put up with him going to bars/clubs. It's just wrong... regardless of whose birthday it is... that's putting yourself in temptation's path. No matter how innocent or harmless it might be... it's just not healthy for a marriage.
It's great to work and provide for your family, but being responsible and attentive goes a lot further than just how hard you bust your ass or how many things you can buy. Just because you set aside some free time just for family, doesn't mean it makes up for the lost time working or doing other things.
My parents didn't have a great marriage but I can only imagine how much worse it would have been if one of them were still going to bars/clubs. I know I wouldn't have liked to see mommy or daddy hanging out in a bar a few nights a week, it's traumatizing and creates insecurities. That's something you have to give up all together if you are ready for marriage. Unless of course, you do it together and that's what you are both happy with. But if one of the people in the marriage, doesn't like it... it's always going to be a problem.
I just don't think partying, without your spouse is good at any time. Having time away from each other is healthy, doing your own hobbies etc... but bars, clubs, parties etc.. That's for single people. People might disagree and that's fine... what works for one person/couple, doesn't always work for the next and if one person in a relationship doesn't like it, it will never work.
Flame away... that's just my opinion.
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Originally posted by nap how old are you two and how long have you all been married
i just turned 21 shes 19 weve been married since last oct - the 25th
she moved in with me about three years ago i should have seen this shit coming
i used to be all luvyduvy and shit and she used to be cool and we had respect but now its like i spoiled her too much and now shes all twisted up
hasnt ever lived in the real world
has no understanding of work other than bussing tables and selling vitamins at gnc
i mean you get the picture
she thinks shes smart as fuck and shes being rebellious but im like laughing to myself because im not her fucking parents rebelling against me is just retarded and counter productive
Wish it was different for ya hon. Best of luck and whatever happens, please remember to always put the little one first. I have no doubt that you will, but sometimes jealous vengeful women make you want to do or say things that can have repercussions later, ya know?
i would say to a degree that shes not twisted like that - her mother definately is so i wouldnt put it past her. its in her genes.
im sure we can both be civil about it but only time will tell.
dude...I'm telling you...she IS twisted like that....My wife's mother is a crazy habitual lying hahahaha and it's been passed down to the daughter...You just haven't seen the ugliness yet...I used to think that my wife couldn't go any lower when it comes to the kids and divorce....the bitch accused me of CHILD PORN! I would never have believed she would have acted like this a year and a half ago....
My wife was just like yours...no matter how much money I gave her..no matter what I did for her..she would take that shit and immediately bite the hand that fed her and claim that I've never done anything for her...
I'm telling you right now...If you give that woman an inch, she will fuck you over....What you need to do is what I should have done....Kicked her down and kept kicking her while she's down..That's what I'm doing now and she STILL doesn't believe the truth and I have my foot solidly on her neck right about now...
GET RID OF HER OR YOU WILL FUCKING REGRET IT!!
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More proof not to get married until you're in your 40's - at least
I got married and had a kid young and while the kid was an excellent parting gift, we were WAY too young to get married. And if you've been with her since she was 16....she's going to be at least 5 different people between the time she's 16 and hits 30.
As far as your spouse going out - I certainly don't see a problem with that. If that's where their friends are going, why shouldn't they (we) join them? There's not any more temptation at a bar than there is any other party, grocery store, office, etc.
Do what's best for the kid - period. And good luck!
Originally posted by Furious_Female I know I wouldn't have liked to see mommy or daddy hanging out in a bar a few nights a week, it's traumatizing and creates insecurities.
It was one night, for a friend's birthday party. It's not like he goes there regularly or was there alone trolling for women... a group of them went out to have a drink.
As for the insecurities - stuff like that doesn't create them. They're there to begin with, especially in young women.
Originally posted by Furious_Female I just don't think partying, without your spouse is good at any time. Having time away from each other is healthy, doing your own hobbies etc... but bars, clubs, parties etc.. That's for single people. People might disagree and that's fine... what works for one person/couple, doesn't always work for the next and if one person in a relationship doesn't like it, it will never work.
Flame away... that's just my opinion.
FF in a lot of ways i agree with you.
this is my situation. my wife doesnt work a 9-5 - shes basically a homemaker.
she does have grandmas and other people she can push the baby off on if necessary. during the day while im doing my thing lining shit up, shes out hanging out with her friends doing whatever. she seems to think that the time that im working is my "me time". now dont get me wrong, i enjoy the shit i do, but work is not my life.
i set aside plenty of time with my family - we do a lot of shit together.
however - me going out and hanging with the boys is not a daily or even weekly occurence. its like once in a blue moon i get to go out and unwind. she gets on a fucking power trip because she thinks that i have all this time to myself doing what i like doing. its a simple misunderstanding that she doesnt have the concept of because, again, she doesnt know any different.
Originally posted by LadyMischief It's funny I hear so many more horror stories about how women fuck men over, sometimes it makes me ashamed to be one. Best of luck, cracker
Not to sound like a bitch, but I think that's the problem with a lot of new marriages today. People still want to do things that single people do. If I had a husband, I'd never put up with him going to bars/clubs. It's just wrong... regardless of whose birthday it is...
ya see ytcracker how twisted some women think? When I run across a woman who thinks like this now, I SPRINT as fast as I can away from her because I know she's a potential nutcase...If I can't go to a bar and have a drink without my woman bitching, why the fuck would I want her...There's a lot of bars that has nothing but men in there trying to get out of the house and get a buzz on before they go home to their bitching wife...And a lot of these bars don't even have enough women to go around in there for you to even have temptation...
RUN FOREST RUN FOREST RUN!!!
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Originally posted by Carrie
It was one night, for a friend's birthday party. It's not like he goes there regularly or was there alone trolling for women... a group of them went out to have a drink.
As for the insecurities - stuff like that doesn't create them. They're there to begin with, especially in young women.
good post ...
And they are there for young men too.
I don't think getting married at age 19 is a good thing.
You're still a teenager for crying out loud.
Not to sound like a bitch, but I think that's the problem with a lot of new marriages today. People still want to do things that single people do. If I had a husband, I'd never put up with him going to bars/clubs. It's just wrong... regardless of whose birthday it is... that's putting yourself in temptation's path. No matter how innocent or harmless it might be... it's just not healthy for a marriage.
It's great to work and provide for your family, but being responsible and attentive goes a lot further than just how hard you bust your ass or how many things you can buy. Just because you set aside some free time just for family, doesn't mean it makes up for the lost time working or doing other things.
My parents didn't have a great marriage but I can only imagine how much worse it would have been if one of them were still going to bars/clubs. I know I wouldn't have liked to see mommy or daddy hanging out in a bar a few nights a week, it's traumatizing and creates insecurities. That's something you have to give up all together if you are ready for marriage. Unless of course, you do it together and that's what you are both happy with. But if one of the people in the marriage, doesn't like it... it's always going to be a problem.
I just don't think partying, without your spouse is good at any time. Having time away from each other is healthy, doing your own hobbies etc... but bars, clubs, parties etc.. That's for single people. People might disagree and that's fine... what works for one person/couple, doesn't always work for the next and if one person in a relationship doesn't like it, it will never work.
Flame away... that's just my opinion.
I see alot of divorces and restraining orders in your future...and all against you ;)
i just turned 21 shes 19 weve been married since last oct - the 25th
she moved in with me about three years ago i should have seen this shit coming
i used to be all luvyduvy and shit and she used to be cool and we had respect but now its like i spoiled her too much and now shes all twisted up
hasnt ever lived in the real world
has no understanding of work other than bussing tables and selling vitamins at gnc
i mean you get the picture
she thinks shes smart as fuck and shes being rebellious but im like laughing to myself because im not her fucking parents rebelling against me is just retarded and counter productive
she cant prove shit to me
Dude, I'm sorry to hear about this! But young marriages don't last long! Sorry to say! I hope everything goes smooth tho!
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ya see ytcracker how twisted some women think? When I run across a woman who thinks like this now, I SPRINT as fast as I can away from her because I know she's a potential nutcase...If I can't go to a bar and have a drink without my woman bitching, why the fuck would I want her...There's a lot of bars that has nothing but men in there trying to get out of the house and get a buzz on before they go home to their bitching wife...And a lot of these bars don't even have enough women to go around in there for you to even have temptation...
RUN FOREST RUN FOREST RUN!!!
Yes - I think I see what you are saying.
I explain it like this ...
If she speaks in "absolutes" ...
- you never listen
- you are always right
- you always go out
RUN FOREST RUN ...
Originally posted by BVF
RUN FOREST RUN FOREST RUN!!!
HAHHAHAHA point taken no doubt.
like i said she used to be understanding and now i just gave her too many inches
miles and miles have gone by and its the only reason she has anything to say
perhaps i am a moderate misogynist in a way - i make compromises but the whip doesnt crack. i bounce back like a bop bag on shit where she tries to put her foot down.
which is why im at this impass - i have sacrificed way too much for this girl and she acts like i have sacrificed nothing. where she thinks that she had these pie in the sky dreams of this and that i dont fall into that equation, yet everything thus far has been my doing - providing a life for my family, taking care of business first and foremost
its easy for her to talk shit because she doesnt know shit period
Originally posted by ytcracker same shit different spin lot of little things that cumulated into a clusterfuck of problems
im sick of my wife being immature and ungrateful - taking everything for granted
shes sick of my long hours and unwillingness to be ruled
my friends 21st birthday was last night so i went out with them - agreed that once the wife called i would bounce, which i did.
she was pissed i was at a bar, which is retarded because where the fuck else would i be. yelled at me in front of everyone, acting hard.
anyway straw that broke the camels back - shes not traditionally materialistic or anything and fairly low maintenence but she gives me absolutely no credit where credit is due - that shit is tiring.
there is always two sides to the story ...
and this is NOT an attack on you ...
but you said "and [an] unwillingness to be ruled" ...
that says to me "she has grown up" and my question to you would be are you letting her expand as an individual?
Sometimes you must think of your kid first and suck it up. Who would get the kid in the divorce - The loving mom who has the support of her friends and parents, or the father, who works in the porn industry? I hate to say it, but that will be the arguement in court.
To me, nothing is worth losing my daughter. I'd kiss anyones ass to ensure I get to see her every day of my life.
Not to sound like a bitch, but I think that's the problem with a lot of new marriages today. People still want to do things that single people do. If I had a husband, I'd never put up with him going to bars/clubs. It's just wrong... regardless of whose birthday it is... that's putting yourself in temptation's path. No matter how innocent or harmless it might be... it's just not healthy for a marriage.
You must be kidding! A guy/girl should have a right to go out with their friends to a bar or club no matter what! The fact that it?s putting in temptations path... If you have an insecurity that he/her will cheat on you then you have more then one problem there. Your significant other should still be able to do what they want with their friends once in a while, just be sure both in the relationship compromise. Seems to me like if you have a problem with the other person going out and doing things without you that you don?t trust them enough to be in such a relationship.
I agree if its every weekend or something thats a little extreme but once in a while should be ok.
I see alot of divorces and restraining orders in your future...and all against you ;)
Naa... actually it's quite simple. If someone does something you can't accept before you get married, they will not change that after you get married. So the idea is, to know who they are and what they want, before you marry them. If it comes as a shock and something new while you are married, what can you do? But if you knew this is what they do BEFORE you say I do, you can't complain about it, after you are married. Marriage doesn't change people, it just changes the status of a relationship.
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My husband and I lived together for almost three years before we got married. By that time, things were settled into a routine that we agreed with and could live with and the vows changed nothing.
Honestly, though, I think much of your trouble stems from the fact that both of you are much too young to be tied to another person. Go fuckin live already. Sow your wild oats, party until you can't stand it anymore, then settle down.
I'm sorry this is happening to you, I've been there. It sucks ass, and yes, get an attorney to represent you. I lost everything, including my son. I won't make that mistake again.
Take care of yourself.
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Not to sound like a bitch, but I think that's the problem with a lot of new marriages today. People still want to do things that single people do. If I had a husband, I'd never put up with him going to bars/clubs. It's just wrong... regardless of whose birthday it is... that's putting yourself in temptation's path. No matter how innocent or harmless it might be... it's just not healthy for a marriage.
There is nothing wrong with going out to a bar or club once in a while. Just because your married doesn't mean that your life is over and you cannot socialize with your friends. Marriage is based on trust and obviously you have trust issues!
And as far as, putting yourself in temptations path, that is ridiculous. I guarantee more married people have affairs with co-workers and people they do business with then with anyone they meet in a bar.
Originally posted by sharky Sometimes you must think of your kid first and suck it up. Who would get the kid in the divorce - The loving mom who has the support of her friends and parents, or the father, who works in the porn industry?
don't listen to this man because he obviously hasn't been in the situation...I'm in it RIGHT NOW!! I have custody of my kids and they are upstairs as we speak...the "loviing" mom is on supervised visitation....
I speak from recent experience in this very particular issue...the rest of these people don't....
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