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hybrid

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#1

Is it ok for your girlfriend to be sexually attracted to someone else?

08-03-2003, 02:48 AM

This is really eating up a buddy of mine. His girlfriend recently shared this with him, and he does'nt know how to react.

His girl was at this thing for work when he was'nt there, and there was some dude there who was older than him and set up in life etc. while he's (my buddy) is still in school. Anyway, this guy is like, totally hitting on his woman, trying to get her drunk & go home with him and shit, even after she told him she had a b/f. Nothing ended up happening, but she told my friend about it a couple days later. According to her, she had chosen him (her b/f) over some momentary "animal sex" urge, but that she *was* attracted to him, and *had* considered it.

He took it all in stride and laughed it off, but he came to me asking how he should've reacted. I told him it was'nt a big deal, and that he should be happy that she feels comfortable in their relationship (about 2 1/2 years) to talk to him about it.

But then I really started thinking about it...

Is it really ok and he should just shrug it off? Or is it kind of tell-tale that she may not be able to handle herself so well in the future, and he should just bag her? Like, would this be a prelude to the fact that she is'nt ready to settle down and still wants to fuck around, or is it normal?

I mean, i know that in my relationship, I crave other women all the time, and it's come close, but it just seems different for a woman.

What do you think i should tell him? Stick with the advice I gave or tell him to bag her?
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#2

08-03-2003, 02:52 AM

You've got to know when to hold em'
Know when to scold em'
Know when to beat their ass
And when to buy a gun

Just kidding around dude. Not sure how I would react exactly.

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#3

08-03-2003, 02:53 AM

Originally posted by stocktrader23
You've got to know when to hold em'
Know when to scold em'
Know when to beat their ass
And when to buy a gun

Just kidding around dude. Not sure how I would react exactly.

fuck off kenny

we'll miss you our friend. RIP
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hybrid

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#4

08-03-2003, 02:54 AM

fuck off kenny
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#5

08-03-2003, 02:54 AM

ask dr phill

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#6

08-03-2003, 02:54 AM

well at least she appears to be honest.
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quiet

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#7

08-03-2003, 02:55 AM

Originally posted by hybrid

rogers

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#8

08-03-2003, 02:56 AM

it's ok if she wants to term her life
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#9

08-03-2003, 02:56 AM

Originally posted by quiet

rogers

I was wondering the same.

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hybrid

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#10

08-03-2003, 02:57 AM

rogers

........
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hybrid

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08-03-2003, 02:57 AM

it's ok if she wants to term her life

What do you mean?
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#12

08-03-2003, 02:58 AM

if my girlfriend did this to me, not sure how i would react.

i think i would be glad she was comfortable to tell me, but pissed he tried to get her.

so id prolly laugh it off with her, or thank her for being honest and faithful, then youd see me in the paper for sticking this dudes chopped off arms into little black bag's

dunno, hard to say without being there.

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#13

08-03-2003, 02:59 AM

Originally posted by hybrid
What do you mean?

i would kill her
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quiet

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#14

08-03-2003, 02:59 AM

you've got to know when to hold em

know when to fold em

know when to walk away

know when to run

you never count your money, while your sittin at the table

they'll be time enough for countin, when the dealin's done

we'll miss you our friend. RIP
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hybrid

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#15

08-03-2003, 03:01 AM

you've got to know when to hold em

know when to fold em

know when to walk away

know when to run

you never count your money, while your sittin at the table

they'll be time enough for countin, when the dealin's done

You're too post to drunk, buddy.
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#16

08-03-2003, 03:02 AM

Originally posted by hybrid

He took it all in stride and laughed it off, but he came to me asking how he should've reacted. I told him it was'nt a big deal, and that he should be happy that she feels comfortable in their relationship (about 2 1/2 years) to talk to him about it.

Keep in mind she still has the other guys phone number -- just in case your friend got or gets pissed enough about it to get in a big fight with her over it

How could he fight with her when shes being so honest and upfront about her feelings for the other guy

Just one "break up day" is all she needs... maybe two if its a weekend.

Sneaky calculating women
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hybrid

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#17

08-03-2003, 03:03 AM

That would be harsh.
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#18

08-03-2003, 03:03 AM

Originally posted by goBigtime

Keep in mind she still has the other guys phone number -- just in case your friend got or gets pissed enough about it to get in a big fight with her over it

-- when, shes being honest and upfront about it

Sneaky calculating women

Good theory, and I bet you are 100% on target also.

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quiet

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#19

08-03-2003, 03:04 AM

Originally posted by hybrid
You're too post to drunk, buddy.

if you say so.

kenny rogers. the gambler.

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#20

08-03-2003, 03:04 AM

Originally posted by stocktrader23

Good theory, and I bet you are 100% on target also.

Even 'dumb' women have certain built-in's
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hybrid

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#21

08-03-2003, 03:05 AM

kenny rogers. the gambler.

D-O-H.
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#22

08-03-2003, 03:07 AM

now im thinking about it

i would have to kill the guy she is attracted. This way i won't be a direct suspect and probably avoid ending up in jail. Life we'll be back in normal after a couple of weeks.
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#23

08-03-2003, 03:07 AM

Let them talk about their future and how serious is all this...

Personally, I would start looking for a new g/f (y)

don't even think about it
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#24

08-03-2003, 03:11 AM

another option.

he can find out the guys name and where he hangs out and begin stalking him to find out what he likes.

become good friends with him, eventually explaining how you had feeling for him and beleive you are true companions, etc, etc.

take pics of you fucking him in the ass and show to the girl and say "see honey? he really wasnt after you!! he is a fucking homo!!"

problem solved

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#25

08-03-2003, 03:11 AM

i have been practising all my life on the

"im innocent" role

i bet i can get an oscar

tell your buddy to contact him. I'll give few acting courses and then he can get rid of the bastard without much worrying.
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#26

08-03-2003, 03:16 AM

If she's honest, it probably means she wants to be faithful.

I mean, COME ON. Guys THINK about banging every hot chick they see. Some do it. Some don't. You can't fault someone just for having desires. That's just unfair and ridiculous.

My husband and I both point out people we think are attractive to each other all the time and we're comfortable with it.

Just this week we were eating in a restaurant and one of the waiters was really sexy. I told my husband about it. Then later that same day I saw a really hot girl in shorts and I pointed her out to him because I knew he'd like to look at her. Heck, I did, too.

The point it, as long as it's just lustful desire and nothing more, and as long as you can be open and honest in your relationship, there is absolutely nothing wrong with looking at other guys or girls lustfully.

Okay, that was WAY too long of a response for having had no sleep, so g'night.
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#27

08-03-2003, 03:18 AM

Originally posted by tootie
If she's honest, it probably means she wants to be faithful.

I mean, COME ON. Guys THINK about banging every hot chick they see. Some do it. Some don't. You can't fault someone just for having desires. That's just unfair and ridiculous.

My husband and I both point out people we think are attractive to each other all the time and we're comfortable with it.

Just this week we were eating in a restaurant and one of the waiters was really sexy. I told my husband about it. Then later that same day I saw a really hot girl in shorts and I pointed her out to him because I knew he'd like to look at her. Heck, I did, too.

The point it, as long as it's just lustful desire and nothing more, and as long as you can be open and honest in your relationship, there is absolutely nothing wrong with looking at other guys or girls lustfully.

Okay, that was WAY too long of a response for having had no sleep, so g'night.

Haha, so you're saying you get to look at guys and in exchange he gets to look at girls. Yet you enjoy looking at them also?

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#28

08-03-2003, 03:19 AM

This sort of thing is going to happen no matter what. Its good that she showed the maturity and responsibility to not be swayed by the guy, As well as telling her BF (your buddy).

A relationship IS nothing but trust. So it's up to this buddy of yours as to whether HE is mature enough to trust her.

Personally, my old man would see to it the guy was divorced if married, fired one way or the other, his family would go missing (to the 4th cousin) and THEN he would get mad at the guy. rotfl

But there are going to be dogs out there that will try for anything female or remotely close to female. He either trusts that she is faithful or not.

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#29

08-03-2003, 03:32 AM

women=bizzatches
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#30

08-03-2003, 04:02 AM

Personally I would pay this guy a visit.

The guy knows she with your friend and is being disrespectable...

I am not the jealous type but would have to give this guy a very stern warning...........just a matter of principle

I don't endorse a god damn thing......
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#31

08-03-2003, 04:07 AM

i dont chase em i replace em..every woman is replaceable

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#32

08-03-2003, 04:22 AM

i replace em..every woman (MAN) is replaceable

And THAT way of thinking is what lead to throwaway relationships lol Teenagers read this and think 'Hey THAT is being real pimpin eh?'

So when they are 30, alone and wondering what happened, maybe they should think about what could have been and try to fix it for the better.

Not that I believe half the sh*t that TDF shoots on here. lol

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#33

08-03-2003, 04:25 AM

Originally posted by Gemini
i replace em..every woman (MAN) is replaceable

And THAT way of thinking is what lead to throwaway relationships lol Teenagers read this and think 'Hey THAT is being real pimpin eh?'

So when they are 30, alone and wondering what happened, maybe they should think about what could have been and try to fix it for the better.

Not that I believe half the sh*t that TDF shoots on here. lol

im too young to think long term..i'd rather wet my dick in every hot piece of latina chocha from here to mexico...im 24,so I have a longg way to go before I consider 'the one'

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#34

08-03-2003, 04:32 AM

That is true in your case TDF... ever put 2-1/2 yrs into a relationship tho? (Not having a clue how old these particular people are in this case)

Something I learned in my mid to late 30's is that when you put forth some serious time and effort in a relationship, you first try to FIX it if something breaks, not just toss it aside. Hey the other person has feelings too. ;-)

But if you are just dating around, its a whole 'nother story. :D As long as the OTHER person understands that its just dating as well.

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#35

08-03-2003, 04:33 AM

Originally posted by Gemini
That is true in your case TDF... ever put 2-1/2 yrs into a relationship tho? (Not having a clue how old these particular people are in this case)

Something I learned in my mid to late 30's is that when you put forth some serious time and effort in a relationship, you first try to FIX it if something breaks, not just toss it aside. Hey the other person has feelings too. ;-)

But if you are just dating around, its a whole 'nother story. :D As long as the OTHER person understands that its just dating as well.

2 years was my longest relationship..pain,love,and sacrifice...i dont know how she did it..im the most stubborn ass person alive

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#36

08-03-2003, 04:53 AM

Nahh *I* live with the most stubborn male around. lol I get my way too but when it comes to some things, it just IS! I'm glad to say after 8 yrs its all been 'for' the best decisions.

I'm stubborn but who isn't anymore? :D

Guess you just have to learn where to cut off the 'selfish' and to turn on the charm!

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#37

08-03-2003, 05:52 AM

A lot of guys seem to think that once they get a girlfriend she is never to have any kind of attraction to another male, period. She is supposed to shut off these urges completely.........

... this is completely retarded.

Guys, grow the fuck up. Only little boys should be intimidated by this. Men are supposed to be a bit more secure in themselves, especially when their woman feels enough intimacy with you to actually come and talk to you about something like this. In this case, I sense that the girl really wanted her boyfriend to know how strong a bond she feels for him, so strong in fact that she would refuse to give in to these natural urges.

I would hang on to a woman like that.

Of course, if you don't want a normal woman you can always go to a fetish club and find yourself a submissive slave bitch that will never so much as look at another man. Feed your insecurity!

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#38

08-03-2003, 05:54 AM

I think she should have just let it go and not said anything to him.

She did nothing wrong, so she wouldn't be hiding anything. Women get hit on all the time, married, single, with a bf.. whatever..

So she may have considered it.. but she didn't do it..

Why go home and tell the other half everytime someone hits on ya..

Some things are probably just better left unsaid..

Now if this guy keeps hitting on her.. then say somethin..

I'm kinda wondering why she told the bf that, "she considered it"

That's just saying, "I thought about going to bed with another guy tonight"

Though honest she may be.. not the best thing to be tellin a bf..
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#39

08-03-2003, 05:56 AM

I think Chris Rock said it best...

That guy is a "dick in a glass case ---- In case of emergency, break open glass"

I would've said it's ok to be attracted to other people, but once she has crossed that mental line of "considering hard sex with random dude" it's time to reasess her deservedness of the puresexnow wang.
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#40

08-03-2003, 06:23 AM

How the hell is this guy supposed to even know that this chick has a b/f, she is not waring a ring is she? She tells him she has a b/f and nothing happens. I would be cool with with, just put my lookout on high for the next couple weeks. Now you "should" be worried if she said she met this nice guy that she thinks the 2 of you could be friends with...thats fucking trouble

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#41

08-03-2003, 06:26 AM

If a woman tries to pretend she isn't sexually attracted to anyone but her man, she's a lying hahahaha. Better that she be honest. It's what she DOES with that attaction that's most important. If she takes it home to her man and takes out her sexual frustration on him, fine. If she's slutting it up and telling him that to "test the waters" and make him jealous, slap the bitch, then ditch the bitch.

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#42

08-03-2003, 09:11 AM

this thread is sorta funny...

I always let my hubby know if i am attracted to the opposite sex... usually its smoking hot guys i see on TV..cause my hubby is pretty damn sexy..but he will not ever admit to even looking at other women, he hides his magazines and secretly watches the playboy channel....wierd...i get upset that he tries harder at hiding it than sharing with me (i have been with more women than him anyhows..hahaha)

your friends should be glad his women is honest like that...If only more people were acceptant of this, it would probably save a relationship or two
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#43

08-03-2003, 09:19 AM

Girls are human too. I'd rather have an open and honest relationship instead of some wanna be fake honest relationship 95% of people have with their loved ones. If I see a girl I wanna bang, I tell my wife. Vice versa for her too (girls AND guys). Do we actually go fuck around? Not if we dont really know the persons... but I have enuff confidence in myself and our relationsip to have such a door open.

Break it down from a nature standpoint and humans aint suppose to be monogomous... its a fucking joke. Hello divorce rates!

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#44

08-03-2003, 09:26 AM

She did nothing. She was honest enough to tell him about it. Every human being in existence is sexually attracted to people other than the one they're dating. No big deal if you don't act on it.

You can tell a person's age by how they respond in this thread. The young guys are still too immature, with low self esteem, so they show that immaturity in their posts.

She sounds like a great girlfriend.

If you don't think YOUR girlfriend has such thoughts you're wrong. Wouldn't you rather KNOW about them directly from her mouth??
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#45

08-03-2003, 09:28 AM

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#46

08-03-2003, 09:31 AM

It's OK for the girlfriend to be attracted to other guys.
Humans are sexual beings and get attracions all the time.
It is good to know she can control her urges, but she shouldn't
have said anything.

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#47

08-03-2003, 09:32 AM

to tell you that she is trying to get your attention. She is saying "hey babe, there are other guys out there after me, you better pay tench! "

Spice it up. Romance her. Tell her how hot she looks etc..

We are always going to be attracted to other people. Its human nature. Anyone who says the are not is full of shit, or married to Pamela Anderson.

Your chick is giving you a chance to get back in the game. Get in there.

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#48

08-03-2003, 09:58 AM

It's okay for a girlfriend to be attracted to someone else, but only if it's another girl.

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#49

08-03-2003, 10:15 AM

yeah like others here say, it happens. she didn't do anything and she told her boyfriend. all i would do is fuck her extra good that night, lol. make sure she knows i love her and all that. and the next time there is some kind of after work activity, i might make more of a point to go with her. if he really had anything to worry about, she wouldn't of said anything.

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#50

08-03-2003, 10:15 AM

Being attracted to someone else when you're in a relationship is normal.

Considering offers to sleep with other people, though, is not cool.

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