Television was made for The Simpsons.
Homer: STEALING?! How COULD YOU! Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons in church, Captain Whatshisname?! We live in a socieity of laws! Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies, for fun? Well I didn't hear anybody laughing!! Did you?! Except at that guy who made sound effects... brrrrrrrrrummm, pyowww, nuhhhhhh, myoooowwww, HONK HONK... hehehe. Where was I? Oh yeah... stay out of my booze!
Another from the same episode, after Bart tries to steal a video game:
Homer: OK, I figured out the boy's punishment. First of all, he's grounded. No leaving the house, not even for school. Second, no egg nog. In fact, no nog, period. And third, absolutely no stealing for 3 months.