Crummy Tour! - GoFuckYourself.com - Adult Webmaster Forum

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cratchit

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#1

Crummy Tour!

01-18-2003, 10:18 PM

my site is about a girl who fucks, sucks and flashes, licks, poses and does glamour shots and my tour reflects Class and Style for the gentleman. I would like to get some real criticism on what to do to get the tour fixed. Can you help?!?!?!
site is http://www.ohjennifer.com
there is an amateur ranks popup, this is not spam i need help!!

Cratchit
Okay this is my first post! Will someone help please!
Just give me all of the critism no holds barred and I will weed through it okay?
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pine

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#2

01-18-2003, 10:21 PM

If you have some money, get a designer.

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cratchit

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#3

01-18-2003, 10:25 PM

And if I dont?
How bout some ideas about what is wrong and what you would do to make it better?
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Lethal

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#4

01-18-2003, 10:30 PM

Quit now, there's no hope. That looks like a really bad regular AVS tour circa 1998. "Crummy" is not the word.
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pine

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#5

01-18-2003, 10:31 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
And if I dont?
How bout some ideas about what is wrong and what you would do to make it better?

format c:

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cratchit

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#6

01-18-2003, 10:38 PM

So IYO What would you spend on a tour and who would you hire?
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Lethal

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#7

01-18-2003, 10:41 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
So IYO What would you spend on a tour and who would you hire?

Well if I were you I'd forget all about porn and go back to BK.
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cratchit

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#8

01-18-2003, 10:42 PM

You know I came here for help. The least you could do is just say "Go Fuck Yourself" and be done with it.
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Plugger

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#9

01-18-2003, 10:44 PM

http://www.webinc.com/websites.html
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Lethal

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#10

01-18-2003, 10:46 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
You know I came here for help. The least you could do is just say "Go Fuck Yourself" and be done with it.

Sure!

GO FUCK YOURSELF

Last edited by Lethal; 01-18-2003, 10:47 PM.
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cratchit

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#11

01-18-2003, 10:46 PM

Dead link.
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Cirrus

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#12

01-18-2003, 10:46 PM

I don't think you need a desinger for an amateur website

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cratchit

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#13

01-18-2003, 10:47 PM

Lethal, so now you are done with it. So you can shut up and get the hell out right? LOL
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pine

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#14

01-18-2003, 10:47 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
So IYO What would you spend on a tour and who would you hire?

Your budget is your budget. There are several threads only a page or two deep here where designers have posted their URLs and portfolios. Some are amazing, expensive and busy, like the guy whose URL I already posted for you. Others are quick and dirty and will get the job done.

Otherwise, surf some other adult-related websites...like the ones on your pop-up. Then, learn how to use an HTML editor like Dreamweaver, GoLive or FrontPage.

Then you can format c:. Deal?

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#15

01-18-2003, 10:47 PM

Originally posted by pine

format c:

355 north
Adultdatelink.com
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cratchit

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#16

01-18-2003, 10:48 PM

Cirrus, what would you suggest. We are on a limited budget and it is a mom and pop thing.
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Cirrus

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#17

01-18-2003, 10:51 PM

From my experience a fancy desing is not wise for amateur type websites. Actually, I believe the worse design the better (with some limits) The surfer should believe that the site/girl is real and I don't think that many people, especially girls, are design wizards.

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cratchit

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#18

01-18-2003, 10:54 PM

I appreciate that, but is there some part of the order, progression or whatever that you would change?
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Cirrus

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#19

01-18-2003, 10:57 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
Cirrus, what would you suggest. We are on a limited budget and it is a mom and pop thing.

The fist page is fine

http://www.ohjennifer.com/index2.htm

here you should optimize your page for higher resolutions, put everything in table tag with these parameters align=center width=100%

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Chrischun

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#20

01-18-2003, 10:59 PM

Hi Cratchit,

i believe we've met before irl at the diplomat last year... also if i recall correctly your in my local area.

as for the design of your site, yup it's gawd awful... i'd be more than happy to design a professional looking tour for you, for trade of services. i don't and wouln't design for money but have done about two dozen pay site tour designs for my own and others sites. interested? let me know.

SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, then you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60.
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Cirrus

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#21

01-18-2003, 11:01 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
I appreciate that, but is there some part of the order, progression or whatever that you would change?

put on your main page your latest update

12.02.03 new pictures added

blablablablabla

for sample pics click here

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cratchit

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#22

01-18-2003, 11:02 PM

Email me Chrischun!!
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RedShoe

赤い靴 call me 202-456-1111

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#23

01-18-2003, 11:02 PM

Originally posted by Chrischun
Hi Cratchit,

i believe we've met before irl at the diplomat last year... also if i recall correctly your in my local area.

as for the design of your site, yup it's gawd awful... i'd be more than happy to design a professional looking tour for you, for trade of services. i don't and wouln't design for money but have done about two dozen pay site tour designs for my own and others sites. interested? let me know.

Why on earth would you design for free?

SPECIALTY COSTUMES • PROPS • FX
Superheroes • Monsters • Robots
PM for details

For any manufacturing needs. Adult or otherwise.

aka BonsHigh on Insta
Bonsai weed plants
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pine

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#24

01-18-2003, 11:03 PM

Originally posted by Cirrus
...

That's some nice content, Cirrus. Do you do that yourself, or are your brokering for someone else?

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Cirrus

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#25

01-18-2003, 11:04 PM

Originally posted by pine

That's some nice content, Cirrus. Do you do that yourself, or are your brokering for someone else?

Own production (I'm not a photographer)

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Chrischun

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#26

01-18-2003, 11:04 PM

Originally posted by RedShoe

Why on earth would you design for free?

i wouldn't design for free... but for trade of services, for sure!

Last edited by Chrischun; 01-18-2003, 11:06 PM.

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wethoney

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#27

01-18-2003, 11:07 PM

Originally posted by Chrischun

i wouldn't design for free... but for trade of services, for sure!

Better make sure Jennifer knows your bartering with her
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cratchit

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#28

01-18-2003, 11:07 PM

Hmm first time here on this board, and I sense some people here under 18. Probably frustrated, fat, ugly, pud wackers with NO... absolutely NO life and nowhere to go. This board probably makes them feel safe and sound and able to act like they have huge gonads when they really have no clue what the hell they are or what they are doing!
Pine, great name! Like the tree.. so your dick is like a tree? LMAO you must have a really small weenie! Sorry!
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quiet

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#29

01-18-2003, 11:09 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
Hmm first time here on this board, and I sense some people here under 18. Probably frustrated, fat, ugly, pud wackers with NO... absolutely NO life and nowhere to go. This board probably makes them feel safe and sound and able to act like they have huge gonads when they really have no clue what the hell they are or what they are doing!
Pine, great name! Like the tree.. so your dick is like a tree? LMAO you must have a really small weenie! Sorry!

you've got us pegged...

we'll miss you our friend. RIP
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cratchit

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#30

01-18-2003, 11:10 PM

Would definitely have to clear any bartering situations through her first!! LOL
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wethoney

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#31

01-18-2003, 11:10 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
Hmm first time here on this board, and I sense some people here under 18. Probably frustrated, fat, ugly, pud wackers with NO... absolutely NO life and nowhere to go. This board probably makes them feel safe and sound and able to act like they have huge gonads when they really have no clue what the hell they are or what they are doing!
Pine, great name! Like the tree.. so your dick is like a tree? LMAO you must have a really small weenie! Sorry!

There is a lot of Keyboard warfare that goes on here.... I get blasted a lot you might even take a few hits just by being in the same thread with me I'm a rebel rouser..
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Cirrus

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#32

01-18-2003, 11:11 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
Hmm first time here on this board, and I sense some people here under 18. Probably frustrated, fat, ugly, pud wackers with NO... absolutely NO life and nowhere to go. This board probably makes them feel safe and sound and able to act like they have huge gonads when they really have no clue what the hell they are or what they are doing!
Pine, great name! Like the tree.. so your dick is like a tree? LMAO you must have a really small weenie! Sorry!

http://amateurmasters.com/

amateur niche people

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cratchit

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#33

01-18-2003, 11:11 PM

Wet... I can take it you don't have to pamper me honey!
Pine and I go way back!
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wethoney

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#34

01-18-2003, 11:14 PM

Originally posted by Cirrus

http://amateurmasters.com/

amateur niche people

Hey Cirrus, I bought a video from you guys that in the description was suppose to come with 64 screenshots... where are the screenshots they weren't in the downloads..
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McAttack

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#35

01-18-2003, 11:16 PM

Ok, brutal honesty (better than bullshit I guess)

The site to me LOOKS like a guy writting for a girl. It reads like a Playboy Playmate article. "Turn ons and turn offs". The writting is very weak and is missing that "personal" touch that is needed in a single model amateur site.

The general design is horrible. I'm not against the black and white deal, but then don't dither your picstures so bad on your tour page that it makes me wonder about the quality inside the site.

The "My Pictures" area has a COMPLETELY different color scheme. Now you're giving the surfer the impression that your site is an absolute mess with no rhyme or reason. Just noticed your join page is also a different style. My expectations of the members area now is a jumble of crappy scans taken with a disposable camera, no real order in it and if the webmaster can't even make the colors match from page to page, they're probably not doing updates too often either.

You're giving a LOT of Diary, but nothing in terms of pictures. Is the diary your main sales tool? I doubt it. If it is supposed to be, then make it look nicer then. Cut the diary down to 3-4 entries, make them sound like stories and cut it short. "Went to vegas, met this girl blah blah blah, lots of foreplay and then we went to the hotel room and we started playing with each other....... more inside"
If the person like stories and wants to play along, then he'll hook up. But the Diary is not a main sales tool.

You have dead links, liek the amateur trading cards. Again this shows that the site isn't being kept up properly.

Your tour is just generally not enticing me. I already see a pic of her tits, so basically, I got a free money shot. Nudity is good, but you already show nipple on your 18+ page. Show a pic of her with a skimpy top, a topless shot from the back so you don't see her tits, stuff like that. Make me WANT to see what her tits look like. Don't just let me see them like that. It's all in the seduction.

You know Teen Kelly converts like crazy.
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cratchit

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#36

01-18-2003, 11:16 PM

Okay, well some help there. Will take all of that in consideration!
1. Hire help
2. Format C:
3. Go fuck myself
4. Put items on index page for updates
5. Center index2.htm
6. Kick Pines Ass
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Cirrus

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#37

01-18-2003, 11:18 PM

Originally posted by wethoney

Hey Cirrus, I bought a video from you guys that in the description was suppose to come with 64 screenshots... where are the screenshots they weren't in the downloads..

You are right, some latest videos got screwed. I will send you a link in a moment

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cratchit

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#38

01-18-2003, 11:19 PM

Fuck me! Thank you! Help... just what I was looking for!
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cratchit

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#39

01-18-2003, 11:20 PM

Thanks McAttack and Cirrus
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wethoney

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#40

01-18-2003, 11:21 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
Fuck me! Thank you! Help... just what I was looking for!

Just like conversion rates for a pay site good pieces of advice on GFY are about 1:500
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Chrischun

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#41

01-18-2003, 11:26 PM

Originally posted by cratchit
Email me Chrischun!!

what's your email?

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pine

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#42

01-19-2003, 12:00 AM

Originally posted by cratchit

...so your dick is like a tree? LMAO you must have a really small weenie! Sorry!

Pine and I go way back!

6. Kick Pines Ass

<center>
<img src="http://home.cogeco.ca/~honeypine/prozac.jpg">
</center>

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wolfie

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#43

01-19-2003, 12:48 AM

Dude, remove that silly error message
" Right mouse click disabled".
It doesn't work.
Don't you know IE6 is a "grabber".
File / Save As gets it all.
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