I figured out why there is such a thing as The Florida Man

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  • crockett
    in a van by the river
    • May 2003
    • 76818

    #1

    I figured out why there is such a thing as The Florida Man

    I never thought about this but Florida is basically Austria in the US.. If Florida Man was in Australia he would just be the guy down the road no one special but in the US he's special.

    Florida is the only fucking place in the world that has Alligators, Crocodiles (including salties). We have fucking pythons, bears, coyotes, boars, panthers, a dozen snakes that can kill you.. Fucking alligator turtles.. yes having Alligators and Crocodiles wan't enough, they had to mix the two in a fucking turtle, that can bite your big toe off in one snap...

    If that's not enough there are wild fucking monkeys..giant lizards.. every shark you can think of including visits from Great Whites. Hell bull sharks routinely travel into the rivers. Not to mention sting rays and those those tiny fucking jellyfish that can actually kill you..

    Then there is the Hurricanes, the tornadoes and it's also the lighting capitol of the world, brain eating ameba and flesh eating bacteria. Then there are the Christians and the nut cases in the neighborhood watch programs shooting kids in hoodies..

    Literally everything in FL is trying to fucking kill you.. It's like Austria.. FL man is literally Mick Dundee..
    In November, you can vote for America's next president or its first dictator.
  • ghjghj
    So Fucking Banned
    • Jun 2005
    • 3768

    #2

    Comment

    • crockett
      in a van by the river
      • May 2003
      • 76818

      #3
      Study finds ghjghj is still a white nationalist.. a racist fuck..
      In November, you can vote for America's next president or its first dictator.

      Comment

      • ghjghj
        So Fucking Banned
        • Jun 2005
        • 3768

        #4
        Whatever you say Florida man

        Comment

        • klinton
          So Fucking Banned
          • Apr 2003
          • 8766

          #5
          Australia, not Austria ????
          :o

          Comment

          • SilentKnight
            Megan Fox's fluffer
            • Oct 2005
            • 24812

            #6
            Originally posted by crockett
            I never thought about this but Florida is basically Austria in the US.. If Florida Man was in Australia he would just be the guy down the road no one special but in the US he's special.

            Florida is the only fucking place in the world that has Alligators, Crocodiles (including salties). We have fucking pythons, bears, coyotes, boars, panthers, a dozen snakes that can kill you.. Fucking alligator turtles.. yes having Alligators and Crocodiles wan't enough, they had to mix the two in a fucking turtle, that can bite your big toe off in one snap...

            If that's not enough there are wild fucking monkeys..giant lizards.. every shark you can think of including visits from Great Whites. Hell bull sharks routinely travel into the rivers. Not to mention sting rays and those those tiny fucking jellyfish that can actually kill you..

            Then there is the Hurricanes, the tornadoes and it's also the lighting capitol of the world, brain eating ameba and flesh eating bacteria. Then there are the Christians and the nut cases in the neighborhood watch programs shooting kids in hoodies..

            Literally everything in FL is trying to fucking kill you.. It's like Austria.. FL man is literally Mick Dundee..
            Wildlife in Florida you say?

            A startling epiphany.

            Comment

            • TheSquealer
              Mayor of Thneedville
              • Oct 2004
              • 26203

              #7
              Dumbass doesn't know the difference between Australia and Austria
              .
              Yes, fewer illegal immigrants working equates to more job opportunities for American citizens.

              Rochard

              Comment

              • wehateporn
                Promoting Debate on GFY
                • Apr 2007
                • 27176

                #8
                Originally posted by crockett
                I never thought about this but Florida is basically Austria in the US.. If Florida Man was in Australia he would just be the guy down the road no one special but in the US he's special.

                Florida is the only fucking place in the world that has Alligators, Crocodiles (including salties). We have fucking pythons, bears, coyotes, boars, panthers, a dozen snakes that can kill you.. Fucking alligator turtles.. yes having Alligators and Crocodiles wan't enough, they had to mix the two in a fucking turtle, that can bite your big toe off in one snap...

                If that's not enough there are wild fucking monkeys..giant lizards.. every shark you can think of including visits from Great Whites. Hell bull sharks routinely travel into the rivers. Not to mention sting rays and those those tiny fucking jellyfish that can actually kill you..

                Then there is the Hurricanes, the tornadoes and it's also the lighting capitol of the world, brain eating ameba and flesh eating bacteria. Then there are the Christians and the nut cases in the neighborhood watch programs shooting kids in hoodies..

                Literally everything in FL is trying to fucking kill you.. It's like Austria.. FL man is literally Mick Dundee..
                You probably should read this

                https://www.quora.com/What-is-the-di...-and-Australia

                Comment

                • escorpio
                  doesn't fuck around.
                  • Oct 2002
                  • 23485

                  #9
                  Unvaxxed, still alive.

                  Comment

                  • crockett
                    in a van by the river
                    • May 2003
                    • 76818

                    #10
                    Originally posted by TheSquealer
                    Dumbass doesn't know the difference between Australia and Austria
                    Dumbass I clearly typed Australia at the start. I'm pretty fucking sure everyone who passed Reading and Comprehension can understand I was referring to Australia . Auto correct on my cellphone seems to have changed it to Austria in the last sentence and I didn't notice.

                    Stop being a suckwaffle..


                    This topic clearly trigger Red Hats.. Why are Red Hats so bat shit insane, perhaps that will be my next topic..
                    In November, you can vote for America's next president or its first dictator.

                    Comment

                    • Bladewire
                      StraightBro
                      • Aug 2003
                      • 56220

                      #11
                      Originally posted by crockett
                      Study finds ghjghj is still a white nationalist.. a racist fuck..
                      Remember, he's an alt-right hate fake nic


                      Skype: CallTomNow

                      Comment

                      • crockett
                        in a van by the river
                        • May 2003
                        • 76818

                        #12
                        Originally posted by wehateporn
                        You should probably stop being a suckwaffle..
                        In November, you can vote for America's next president or its first dictator.

                        Comment

                        • ghjghj
                          So Fucking Banned
                          • Jun 2005
                          • 3768

                          #13
                          Originally posted by Bladewire
                          Remember, he's an alt-right hate fake nic

                          Comment

                          • Natalie_K
                            Confirmed User
                            • Oct 2016
                            • 217

                            #14
                            In the words of Rochard, "You'd have to be a complete idiot to choose to live in Florida"

                            Comment

                            • crockett
                              in a van by the river
                              • May 2003
                              • 76818

                              #15
                              Originally posted by Natalie_K
                              In the words of Rochard, "You'd have to be a complete idiot to choose to live in Florida"
                              Unfortunately, I have family and a decent sized chunk of land here otherwise I'd have stayed the fuck out of this state when I left before..
                              In November, you can vote for America's next president or its first dictator.

                              Comment

                              • Natalie_K
                                Confirmed User
                                • Oct 2016
                                • 217

                                #16
                                Originally posted by crockett
                                Unfortunately, I have family and a decent sized chunk of land here otherwise I'd have stayed the fuck out of this state when I left before..
                                Actually out of all the things you mentioned, your story about lightning scares me the most.

                                Comment

                                • Bladewire
                                  StraightBro
                                  • Aug 2003
                                  • 56220

                                  #17
                                  ↑↑↑ Alt-right hate fake nic


                                  Skype: CallTomNow

                                  Comment

                                  • ruff
                                    I have a plan B
                                    • Aug 2004
                                    • 5499

                                    #18
                                    Just watch where you step when you're in Florida and you'll be okay.
                                    CryptoFeeds

                                    Comment

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