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********* Story # 4 ***********
Yo JUD,
Relationships END. Don't let her CON you into this "We can just be FRIENDS" Bullshit. SEVER TIES MY MAN!!!!!!!! Anyway, I had an ex-girlfriend (who by the way is CANADIAN) a few years back and basically, this chick just out of nowhere fucking ruined me. We had never had any fights or anything but she basically shows up at my place. I had justbought a new pack of RUBS and some wine for the evening. This was in mid AUGUST about this time of year in 1996. Anyway, I gots all my shit in order
for the evening, and she comes over and sits next to me on the couch. My roomates are all working this night and I am ready for some FUCKIN all over the house because no one will be around. She lays her head in my lap and she takes my shorts off and starts givin' me a quite nice smoker. Then all of a sudden, she puts my unit back in my underwear and just lays there. She
isn't really saying anything and I am a bit confused as I was just getting a hummer while watching the L.A. Dodgers game and all of a sudden, no more hummer.
I was like, "Hey you wanna go to my room??" No response. This is getting weird I think. I say, "What's up??? Do you want some wine??" No response. I asked her a couple of other things and she didn't say a word. SO as a joke (or so I thought) I say, "What???? Are you dumping me???" I laugh at the preposterousness of such a concept. She finally says quitely,
"Yeah."
Needless to say, It was quite a blow (not literally). I got her off my lap and went into my room and looked at myself in the mirror shocked that after three years with this bitch, she would not only dump me, but tease me with a 'LAST BLOW JOB' that I don't even get to finish.
Well, being that her birthday was in September a couple weeks off, I had given her an early B-Day present a week or so earlier of two front row tickets to see RUSH along with some real ornate and expensive Chinese sculptures. She liked RUSH a lot (perhaps due to their CANADIANNESS) and so I paid almost $200.00 AMERICAN for these tickets and gave them to her for us
to go. Then I got dumped as hereinbefore explained, and I found out that she had been "Hanging out" with an old friend of her's named Dan in the months leading up to the break up. She lets me know that they had, "AT LEAST KISSED......." prior to her severing our relationship. SHe wouldn't say anything beyond that but she implied that more took place which I later
found out, it did.
Not one to take being JILTED lightly, I stopped talking to her. But what REALLY chapped my ass was to think of her and her new QUEER-FUCK boyfriend sitting in the front row to see RUSH. I don't even LIKE RUSH but still, I buy the fucking tickets and she fucks me over right before theconcert???????? I don't EVEN FUCKING THINK SO!!!!!! SO I got my plan into gear. I went to her Junior College and found her car in the parking lot. I used my copy of her car key to open her vehicle and low and behold, there
was one of the Chinese Scuptures I gave her and her Birthday card with theRUSH tickets still inside!!!!!!!!! I thought to myself, "NO BITCH FUCKS ME OVER." Then I took the scuplture and the tickets and left a note signed byme saying, "Thanks for the memories. Enjoy your birthday!!!" I then pawned the sculpture, (getting ALMOST 40% of what I paid for it). I also
posted at my University that I had two front row RUSH tickets for the upcoming show. I got so many interested parties, I ended up not only selling the tickets to a cute freshman chick, but I got $20.00 more than the ticket price per ticket. This REALLY pissed off my Ex who kept leavingmessages shitting on me and saying that NO ONE takes back gifts and that I was a cheap asshole and all this.
Here though is where GOD really took care of me. I was able to buy pretty good Laker tickets with my sculpture/RUSH tickets proceeds for a gamein L.A. against the Celtics which kicked ass. What REALLY kicked ass was that I took one of my Ex's coworkers who is hot and has fake tits. She gaveme a Blowjob in the car on the way home from the game and word soon got
around at their place of work. Apparently, my girlfriend became so upset and nauseous at hearing about it that she had to leave work to go home andcry. This was great in itself but what is better is that while I never did get to fuck my ex's coworker, about a month later I ended up hooking up with the freshman cutie that bought the RUSH tickets off of me and went out with
her for 2 years......before she also dumped me!!!! I can't win!!!!!!!!!!
Hope this helps you out man. One more thing though.....Go look at yourself in the mirror, pause, and then ell, "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
THIS BROTHA'S FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Then get yourself back out on the market and bird dog some beaver.
Sincerely,
G.W
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