Originally Posted by Jel

I'm way too fucking lazy to give pointers, just let me know when L-Pink has posted. In fact I'll just agree with what he says now.

some phrases to remember, then you can utilise them as/when/etc

clown's pocket
wizard's sleeve
yawning donkey

pro tips:
utilise her best friend's name/close friend who is promiscuous (you must be spoilt, because jenny couldn't get enough of my dick while I was fucking her on the side)

utilise the name of whichever ex you had before her that she is insecure about, if applicable (I couldn't get into tongueing your cave of a cunt without thinking about sheila as you didn't do it for me like she did, and my mind would wander off to her, so yeah - my bad on that one no wonder you didn't cum)

in general: damn that's almost as many words as fingers can fit inside that clown's pocket of a cunt you have between those wobbly fat things you call legs

etc. though going by replies so far, seems uk and usa humour is even more different than I previously thought.