"How To Tell if Your Wife is a Porn Star"

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  • TimCase
    Confirmed User
    • Jul 2004
    • 123

    #1

    "How To Tell if Your Wife is a Porn Star"

    http://www.beatking.com/forums/index...&mode=threaded

    YOUR WIFE COULD BE PORN STAR!
    Here's how to tell:

    By DOUG VINCENT

    Porn Stars are living among us -- and your wife could be one of them!

    "You'd be amazed at the number of ordinary men who are married to famous porn stars and don't even know it," states A. J. Podaski, a California based writer who covers the adult-film industry. "More and more XXX actresses want the stability of marriage, but they don't want to give up the money and glamour of porn. So they just lie about it."

    Here are some foolproof ways to tell if your wife is making dirty movies behind your back:

    -- Every couple of weeks she has to fly to California to care for a "sick aunt."

    -- When in bed, she just lies there until you yell "Action!"

    -- Just as you're about to make love, she asks, "What's my motivation?"

    -- She keeps getting mail addressed to "Patty O'Plenty."

    -- Whenever you go out, drooling men ask her for her autograph.

    -- She looks suspiciously like the Hustler pin-up in your neighbor's garage.

    -- She knows sexual positions that would put a circus contortionist in the hospital.

    -- She wears a micro miniskirt and six-inch spike heels to go grocery shopping.

    -- On your joint tax return she lists her occupation as "passion princess."
    Tim Case
    Writer. Strip Club Manager. Suitcase Pimp. Hippie.
    http://www.TittyBarBoss.com
  • munki
    Do Fun Shit.
    • Dec 2004
    • 13393

    #2

    I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.” -Oscar Wilde

    Comment

    • Spyce
      Confirmed User
      • Dec 2002
      • 335

      #3
      She's not keeping it much of a secret, is she??? LOL :-)
      Spyce



      Our content feeds, your design - now starting at only $0.49 per gb - NO MINIMUMS!

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      • tony299
        lurker
        • Aug 2002
        • 57021

        #4
        very funny stuff

        Comment

        • Jens Van Assterdam
          The Dupre Pimp
          • Feb 2008
          • 6677

          #5
          lol i love that haha.
          Read TOS for signature rules

          Comment

          • SexualDragon
            Confirmed User
            • Aug 2006
            • 3038

            #6
            When in bed, she just lies there until you yell "Action!"
            Make 2009 a great year with Tiffany Preston
            436-127-934

            Comment

            • Farang
              one sick puppy
              • Oct 2004
              • 11713

              #7
              LOL
              fbm

              Comment

              • raven1083
                Confirmed User
                • Jul 2007
                • 7687

                #8
                Such a funny stuff, going to relay it to my friend!
                Femdom Stories | Bound BBW Blog and Videos |Bondage Sex Videos and Pictures

                Hardcore Japanese Bondage | BDSM Movies And Galleries Mistress Cuckold CBT

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                • Iron Fist
                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                  • Dec 2006
                  • 23400

                  #9
                  I am perfectly fine with this.
                  i like waffles

                  Comment

                  • GrouchyAdmin
                    Now choke yourself!
                    • Apr 2006
                    • 12085

                    #10
                    ...I still have to pay her $250 and have her sign a document up front.

                    Comment

                    • Michaelious
                      Confirmed User
                      • Jan 2004
                      • 6720

                      #11
                      Lol funny mate, i like that one!

                      Comment

                      • Porno Dan
                        Court Jester
                        • May 2003
                        • 6342

                        #12
                        She asks to see your test before she blows you.
                        Reality TV Star, AVN Hall of Fame, Five-Time XBIZ Winner

                        2021 XBIZ Europe Winner Best Director Site

                        Promote the sites where members get paid to get laid by their favorite porn stars

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                        • Vick!
                          Confirmed User
                          • Nov 2005
                          • 6882

                          #13
                          funny .. but I was expecting something better.
                          Affordable Quality Web Hosting

                          Comment

                          • Lace
                            Too lazy to set a custom title
                            • Mar 2004
                            • 16116

                            #14
                            Originally posted by Vick!
                            funny .. but I was expecting something better.
                            I concur!
                            Your Paysite Partner
                            Strength In Numbers!
                            StickyDollars | RadicalCash | KennysPennies | HomegrownCash

                            Comment

                            • tehHinjew
                              Confirmed User
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 5755

                              #15
                              lol nice ones

                              Hot Porn Wanna trade? email me at wanker (@) wanknation dot com

                              Comment

                              • D Ghost
                                null
                                • May 2006
                                • 9819

                                #16
                                hahha pretty funny

                                Comment

                                • Dagwolf
                                  President of Canada
                                  • Sep 2003
                                  • 23141

                                  #17
                                  Yep, the signs are there.
                                  Sleep well, and dream of large women.

                                  Comment

                                  • NemesisEnforcer
                                    Confirmed User
                                    • Aug 2003
                                    • 2122

                                    #18
                                    You missed one.

                                    -- Every time you have sex with her, you get a strange bill for a $100 agency fee.
                                    The Only Time When Success Comes Before Work Is In A Dictionary.

                                    Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs.'

                                    Comment

                                    • Spunky
                                      I need a beer
                                      • Jun 2002
                                      • 133978

                                      #19
                                      They are all whores

                                      Comment

                                      • CumSlutKylie
                                        Confirmed User
                                        • Dec 2006
                                        • 103

                                        #20
                                        nice spunky...
                                        my hubby can prob relate on some level...no lies here tho
                                        Make some real Ka$h with Kylie!
                                        http://www.kyliekash.com

                                        -----> Read My Slutty Blog

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