I had sex in the kitchen

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  • kane
    Too lazy to set a custom title
    • Aug 2001
    • 20684
    #1

    I had sex in the kitchen

    As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while. She has moved into an assisted living center. My brother is getting divorced and is going to stay with me for a while but he isn't moving in for a few more weeks. So last night the girlfriend and I are watching a movie and messing around. She suggests that since time alone in this house seems to be non-existent we should do it in the kitchen just because we can.

    I have to admit, it wasn't as cool as it looks in porn. The freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher.

    We both ended up laughing more than anything else.

    Clearly being a pornstar is a talent.
    Tags: None
    • bluebook18
      Confirmed User
      • Mar 2012
      • 4082
      #2
      you should take away your balls out in the kitchen

        Comment

        • pornmasta
          Too lazy to set a custom title
          • Jun 2006
          • 19809
          #3
          sex in the kitchen ? like in a porn movie ?
          So now, ask your girlfriend to do the same thing as in this picture:

            Comment

            • kane
              Too lazy to set a custom title
              • Aug 2001
              • 20684
              #4
              Originally posted by pornmasta
              sex in the kitchen ? like in a porn movie ?
              So now, ask your girlfriend to do the same thing as in this picture:

              that is hands on directing.

                Comment

                • thegreatestporn
                  Confirmed User
                  • May 2012
                  • 516
                  #5
                  Next time make her start cooking. Then do it standing up while shes making a meal. Its a win win!
                  CrakRevenue | WebCamWiz - Free WebCam Whitelabel |

                    Comment

                    • kane
                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                      • Aug 2001
                      • 20684
                      #6
                      Originally posted by thegreatestporn
                      Next time make her start cooking. Then do it standing up while shes making a meal. Its a win win!
                      Not a bad idea. . . the problem is she might be the worst cook ever. She can make mac n cheese, but that is about it.

                        Comment

                        • AaronM
                          GFY Royality ;)
                          • Oct 2001
                          • 46917
                          #7
                          Originally posted by kane
                          Not a bad idea. . . the problem is she might be the worst cook ever. She can make mac n cheese, but that is about it.

                          Try it while she's cooking bacon.

                            Comment

                            • AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                              Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
                              • Jul 2004
                              • 38323
                              #8
                              Originally posted by AaronM

                              Try it while she's cooking bacon.


                              Sounds like you and your wifey both need to spend more time in the kitchen - her cooking, and you basting...practice makes perfect!



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                                • shake
                                  frc
                                  • Jul 2003
                                  • 4663
                                  #9
                                  Remind me not to eat off your counter
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                                    Comment

                                    • alias
                                      aliasx
                                      • Apr 2001
                                      • 19010
                                      #10
                                      Bro, I stay positive & so should you.

                                      Instead of "freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher"

                                      May I suggest:

                                      This cum slut was so demanding of all my cock that I didn't even notice how I was pulverizing my lower leg as I fucked her hard on the tile.

                                      I was demolishing that ass so badly that I barely noticed the repeated impact of my engorged sperm sack on the appliances."

                                      Also, pics.
                                      https://porncorporation.com

                                        Comment

                                        • CheeseFrog
                                          Confirmed User
                                          • Dec 2003
                                          • 1724
                                          #11
                                          Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".
                                          Cary | AIM: cheesefrog | ICQ: 4287002

                                            Comment

                                            • baddog
                                              So Fucking Banned
                                              • Apr 2001
                                              • 107089
                                              #12
                                              Originally posted by CheeseFrog
                                              Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".

                                                Comment

                                                • Chosen
                                                  VIPPay.com | AdultWebSponsors.com
                                                  • Aug 2001
                                                  • 63151
                                                  #13
                                                  Pics or it didn't happen

                                                    Comment

                                                    • Chosen
                                                      VIPPay.com | AdultWebSponsors.com
                                                      • Aug 2001
                                                      • 63151
                                                      #14
                                                      Originally posted by CheeseFrog
                                                      Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".
                                                      LoL

                                                        Comment

                                                        • ottopottomouse
                                                          She is ugly, bad luck.
                                                          • Jan 2010
                                                          • 13177
                                                          #15
                                                          Originally posted by alias
                                                          Bro, I stay positive & so should you.

                                                          Instead of "freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher"

                                                          May I suggest:

                                                          This cum slut was so demanding of all my cock that I didn't even notice how I was pulverizing my lower leg as I fucked her hard on the tile.

                                                          I was demolishing that ass so badly that I barely noticed the repeated impact of my engorged sperm sack on the appliances."

                                                          Also, pics.
                                                          ↑ see post ↑
                                                          13101

                                                            Comment

                                                            • AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                                                              Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
                                                              • Jul 2004
                                                              • 38323
                                                              #16
                                                              If you get tired of sex in the kitchen you could always read a book:





                                                              Of course, there is always sex on the beach:



                                                              Then you would probably be bitching about the sand getting in everything...



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                                                                • joerudy1988
                                                                  Confirmed User
                                                                  • Apr 2012
                                                                  • 224
                                                                  #17
                                                                  what was the camera man doing?
                                                                  Sig too big

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                                                                    Comment

                                                                    • Lykos
                                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                      • Apr 2003
                                                                      • 31027
                                                                      #18
                                                                      Originally posted by AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                                                                      If you get tired of sex in the kitchen you could always read a book:





                                                                      Of course, there is always sex on the beach:



                                                                      Then you would probably be bitching about the sand getting in everything...



                                                                      ADG

                                                                        Comment

                                                                        • brassmonkey
                                                                          Pay It Forward
                                                                          • Sep 2005
                                                                          • 77384
                                                                          #19
                                                                          you have a bedroom? turn on some music and bang out
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                                                                            Comment

                                                                            • Bill8
                                                                              Confirmed User
                                                                              • Oct 2001
                                                                              • 1901
                                                                              #20
                                                                              bent over a table or counter is the only thing that ever really worked for me as far as kitchen sex goes.

                                                                                Comment

                                                                                • TisMe
                                                                                  Confirmed User
                                                                                  • Aug 2008
                                                                                  • 1719
                                                                                  #21
                                                                                  Please cancel my roast beef with mayo on rye.

                                                                                  Also, CheeseFrog makes a very good point

                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                    • Verbal
                                                                                      Confirmed User
                                                                                      • Dec 2001
                                                                                      • 3420
                                                                                      #22
                                                                                      Neuken in de keuken

                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                        • Wizzo
                                                                                          2011 GFY Hall of Fame!
                                                                                          • Nov 2000
                                                                                          • 15224
                                                                                          #23
                                                                                          I'm just glad your GF was there or this would be a much different thread...
                                                                                          Looking for Opportunity!

                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                            • Chosen
                                                                                              VIPPay.com | AdultWebSponsors.com
                                                                                              • Aug 2001
                                                                                              • 63151
                                                                                              #24
                                                                                              Originally posted by AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                                                                                              Of course, there is always sex on the beach:



                                                                                              Then you would probably be bitching about the sand getting in everything...



                                                                                              ADG
                                                                                              This one is really cool

                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                • martinsc
                                                                                                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                  • Jun 2005
                                                                                                  • 27043
                                                                                                  #25
                                                                                                  hehe, yeah, the kitchen isn't the most comfortable place for that.... hehehe
                                                                                                  Make Money

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                                                                                                    • adultchatpay
                                                                                                      Let's Make Money
                                                                                                      • Dec 2008
                                                                                                      • 8775
                                                                                                      #26
                                                                                                      It should be served with bacon and eggs.

                                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                                        • MarkDeus
                                                                                                          Confirmed User
                                                                                                          • Oct 2011
                                                                                                          • 643
                                                                                                          #27
                                                                                                          You should leave that stuff to pros.


                                                                                                          Worst appliance I've done it on was a drying machine. All you heard is loud noises because it moves around, and the sides are goddamn cold.
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                                                                                                            • sperbonzo
                                                                                                              I'd rather be on my boat.
                                                                                                              • May 2003
                                                                                                              • 9750
                                                                                                              #28
                                                                                                              Originally posted by CheeseFrog
                                                                                                              Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".
                                                                                                              DAMN! You beat me to it! That's EXACTLY what I was thinking as I started reading... Like, whaaaaaaaaaat?





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                                                                                                                • John-ACWM
                                                                                                                  Work Work Work
                                                                                                                  • Nov 2008
                                                                                                                  • 20060
                                                                                                                  #29
                                                                                                                  fun times

                                                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                                                    • 2intense
                                                                                                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                      • Dec 2009
                                                                                                                      • 12495
                                                                                                                      #30
                                                                                                                      Originally posted by pornmasta
                                                                                                                      sex in the kitchen ? like in a porn movie ?
                                                                                                                      So now, ask your girlfriend to do the same thing as in this picture:

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                                                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                                                        • kane
                                                                                                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                          • Aug 2001
                                                                                                                          • 20684
                                                                                                                          #31
                                                                                                                          Originally posted by CheeseFrog
                                                                                                                          Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".
                                                                                                                          LOL you have a great point.

                                                                                                                          This was a case of too much information

                                                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                                                            • PAR
                                                                                                                              Confirmed User
                                                                                                                              • May 2005
                                                                                                                              • 1835
                                                                                                                              #32
                                                                                                                              Originally posted by kane
                                                                                                                              Clearly being a pornstar is a talent.
                                                                                                                              So was she able to make you a sandwich at the same time?

                                                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                                                • ShoeBox
                                                                                                                                  So Fucking Banned
                                                                                                                                  • May 2012
                                                                                                                                  • 2056
                                                                                                                                  #33
                                                                                                                                  Originally posted by kane
                                                                                                                                  As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while. She has moved into an assisted living center. My brother is getting divorced and is going to stay with me for a while but he isn't moving in for a few more weeks. So last night the girlfriend and I are watching a movie and messing around. She suggests that since time alone in this house seems to be non-existent we should do it in the kitchen just because we can.

                                                                                                                                  I have to admit, it wasn't as cool as it looks in porn. The freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher.

                                                                                                                                  We both ended up laughing more than anything else.

                                                                                                                                  Clearly being a pornstar is a talent.
                                                                                                                                  LOL maybe your mom should come back home

                                                                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                                                                    • newb102k
                                                                                                                                      So Fucking Banned
                                                                                                                                      • Aug 2011
                                                                                                                                      • 665
                                                                                                                                      #34
                                                                                                                                      nice share of experience!

                                                                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                                                                        • kane
                                                                                                                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                                                          • Aug 2001
                                                                                                                                          • 20684
                                                                                                                                          #35
                                                                                                                                          Originally posted by PAR
                                                                                                                                          So was she able to make you a sandwich at the same time?
                                                                                                                                          Sadly, I did all the work and then bought her dinner. . . . greedy woman

                                                                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                                                                            • shimmy2
                                                                                                                                              Confirmed User
                                                                                                                                              • Mar 2009
                                                                                                                                              • 3271
                                                                                                                                              #36
                                                                                                                                              i film girls in kitchens/bathrooms for the lighting and the audio comes out better in enclosed areas. its not practical or comfortable to do it on a hard cold dirty floor. leave it to the movies
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