Hollywood Rock Critic Survives Shark Attack

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  • BAKO
    Don’t be a short Imp
    • Jul 2005
    • 18482

    #1

    Hollywood Rock Critic Survives Shark Attack

    LOS ANGELES ? In a rather bizarre twist of events, a well known rock journalist and screenwriter was attacked in his own swimming pool by a six foot Tiger shark that was accidentally dropped there by a Los Angeles Fire Department helicopter while fighting a raging brush fire in the 2000 block of Nichols Canyon on Tuesday night.

    Brett Meisner, 39, was rushed to an area hospital early Wednesday morning after the vicious attack in the swimming pool area of his Hollywood Hills residence . Meisner suffered massive blood loss and substantial injuries to his right arm during the scuffle. The shark was killed during the half hour battle which was reportedly triggered by Meisner?s attempt to remove the shark from his pool.

    ?He was obviously angered by the circumstances of having this animal in his swimming pool,? said veteran record producer, Bob Ezrin. ?We tried to persuade him to wait for the proper authorities, but he wouldn?t listen to us.? Ezrin and another house guest drove Meisner to the hospital after witnessing the entire attack. ?It was one of the most bizarre events I have ever witnessed, and I?ve seen a lot over the years.?

    Meisner was released from the hospital Saturday morning and is reportedly in good condition. Manager Jace Hollinger did not rule out pursuing legal action on behalf of his client. ?Our main concern is Brett?s health and safety,? stressed Hollinger. ?At the same time we strongly oppose the idea that it is acceptable for the Fire Department of Los Angeles to cluster bomb its citizens with man eating sharks.?

    The Los Angeles Fire Department is conducting a full investigation and refused to comment at this time. It is believed that the shark may have been accidentally pulled from the waters of Malibu as a squad of ten fire fighting helicopters were repeatedly reloading their payloads with ocean water in an effort to fight the fire in the posh and exclusive Canyon area. Believed to have been started by an unattended campsite fire, the blaze destroyed nearly 40 acres of land. No homes were damaged as a result of the fire.

    This shit made me laugh for hours
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  • dav3
    Confirmed User
    • May 2007
    • 7348

    #2
    Poor shark.
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    • JA$ON
      Confirmed User
      • Aug 2007
      • 1329

      #3
      This guy is the best, check out his site....

      www.rockandrollbadboy.com

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      • Sacred Belle
        Registered User
        • Jul 2007
        • 61

        #4
        wow...thats fucked up


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        • _mC_
          Confirmed User
          • Jun 2002
          • 1195

          #5

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          • BAKO
            Don’t be a short Imp
            • Jul 2005
            • 18482

            #6
            the guy is a fucking legend yo
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            • JA$ON
              Confirmed User
              • Aug 2007
              • 1329

              #7
              Here is the link on his site.....

              http://www.rockandrollbadboy.com/hol..._shark_attack/

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              • BAKO
                Don’t be a short Imp
                • Jul 2005
                • 18482

                #8
                Originally posted by JA$ON

                Shit was so funny i forgot to post the link
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                • Jimmy Rock
                  Confirmed User
                  • Feb 2005
                  • 3055

                  #9
                  There was no shark in that pool!! it was Bako... when Brett Meisner went for a swim, Bako held his breath for 2 whole minutes then attacked Bretts toes slightly injuring his pinky toe on his left foot... Thats the real story!!
                  Jimmy Rock | ICQ: 285 748 329
                  [email protected]

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                  • CynthiaB
                    Confirmed User
                    • Mar 2005
                    • 1274

                    #10
                    If he wrote that in a movie no one would believe it - but then who tries to get a shark out of a pool with your bare hands!

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                    • WarChild
                      Let slip the dogs of war.
                      • Jan 2003
                      • 17263

                      #11
                      Originally posted by WWC-Bako
                      Manager Jace Hollinger did not rule out pursuing legal action on behalf of his client. ?Our main concern is Brett?s health and safety,? stressed Hollinger. ?At the same time we strongly oppose the idea that it is acceptable for the Fire Department of Los Angeles to cluster bomb its citizens with man eating sharks.?
                      Of course they're going to persue legal action because as a whole, Americans are the largest group of people that refuse to take responsibility for their own actions on earth.

                      Sure, it's stupid that the shark ended up in his pool, but what's even dumber is that this fucking idiot decided to try and remove it himself thus being the direct cause of all the injuries he sustained. Time to sue!
                      .

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                      • Profits of Doom
                        Monster Rain
                        • Feb 2004
                        • 4978

                        #12
                        Talk about wining the unlucky lottery. I thought he was swimming and the shark was dumped in his pool, but this genius wasn't even in the pool decides to try and get the shark out himself? Nice...
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                        • JA$ON
                          Confirmed User
                          • Aug 2007
                          • 1329

                          #13
                          Originally posted by WWC-Bako
                          the guy is a fucking legend yo
                          I cant belive you you found that article, B is a great friend of mine for a looonnnggg time and a true character in Hollywood. Here is another classic pic.....

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                          • MikeVega
                            **Porntrepreneur**
                            • Jul 2004
                            • 12788

                            #14
                            its funny but can't be true. the buckets they use to scoop water have a big grate in them to stop anything bigger then a fist from entering it. it could not have scooped up a 6' shark ...lol


                            Mike Vega-ICQ:253868499-AIM:mikeydicevega

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                            • crockett
                              in a van by the river
                              • May 2003
                              • 76818

                              #15
                              WTF is this for real did you get this from some tablid or some shit? How the fuck could that happen lol.
                              In November, you can vote for America's next president or its first dictator.

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                              • WarChild
                                Let slip the dogs of war.
                                • Jan 2003
                                • 17263

                                #16
                                Yeah this whole thing does seem a little unlikely.
                                .

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                                • BAKO
                                  Don’t be a short Imp
                                  • Jul 2005
                                  • 18482

                                  #17
                                  It gets funnier every minute OMFG
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                                  • JA$ON
                                    Confirmed User
                                    • Aug 2007
                                    • 1329

                                    #18
                                    Originally posted by WWC-Bako
                                    It gets funnier every minute OMFG
                                    You should see the threads on his site. People debate the crazieness for fucking hours, LOL

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                                    • BAKO
                                      Don’t be a short Imp
                                      • Jul 2005
                                      • 18482

                                      #19
                                      Originally posted by JA$ON
                                      You should see the threads on his site. People debate the crazieness for fucking hours, LOL
                                      I do visit sometimes
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                                      • Drake
                                        Hello world!
                                        • Mar 2003
                                        • 12508

                                        #20
                                        That's funny as hell lol

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                                        • Shok
                                          Confirmed User
                                          • Apr 2001
                                          • 5611

                                          #21
                                          For Immediate Release
                                          08/12/2005

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